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female Is it Seen as Impolite For Women to Excuse Themselves to Use the Bathroom?


Is it Seen as Impolite For Women to Excuse Themselves to Use the Bathroom?  

76 members have voted

  1. 1. Do you think people see it as impolite for women to excuse themselves to use the bathroom?

    • Yes.
      11
    • No.
      65


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I was just thinking about my other thread about social interaction when desperate and this suddenly occurred to me that I felt that in a subtle way, maybe not so subtle way in some cases, women are sort of politely encouraged to not mention their need to go to the bathroom until they can politely take care of it without making a big fuss about it. Like if a guy announces I have to take a huge piss or I have to take a huge dump people will think it's kind of funny, but I think that when a woman announces that she has to go to the bathroom a lot of people sort of feel it's inappropriate or gross.


I mean maybe it's because I grew up with a love of toilet humor and being open about bodily functions, but I always got the subtle feeling that my family sort of disapproved of the idea of a woman announcing that she needs the bathroom, like it is something that you quietly take care of when you have the appropriate moment but otherwise you do not excuse yourself to go to the bathroom if you happen to be interacting with somebody else.


I guess it also goes along with that whole mythology that some people like to promote the idea that women are dainty things and they don't do gross things like piss and shit. Of course everybody on this message board knows better, but what I am asking is not how you personally feel in the matter, as I know most here would likely be excited by a woman announcing her need, but how you feel that society in general tends to regard this from what you have noticed from your interactions with others.

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I think that people of both genders usually try to avoid to mention their need to use the toilet and take care of it "silently" (without talking about it). If that's not possible and you need to excuse yourself (like during dinner at a restaurant or a meeting) or if you need to ask where a bathroom is, then I think it's more a matter of personality and upbringing than a matter of gender. Maybe women tend to be raised in a way that they're more shy about mentioning their needs, especailly about something that's deemed "too personal" (like bodily functions). I would think (and hope) this is something that has changed in the past decades. I definitely don't think it's "impolite" to excuse yourself to the bathroom (no matter what gender you are) and I feel like most people nowadays do feel the same.

Edited by JensH2 (see edit history)
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It's quite normal that you have to pee occasionally, so I don't see why it would be impolite for women to excuse themselves to use the bathroom. But it can be a bit embarrassing, if you have to do it several times in quick successions and people are often reluctant to go to the bathroom for second or third time in short time span.

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@JensH2

"Maybe women tend to be raised in a way that they're more shy about mentioning their needs, especailly about something that's deemed "too personal" (like bodily functions). I would think (and hope) this is something that has changed in the past decades."

I think that's the way women are raised in general as I know I was certainly raised that way but it didn't really take! My family was really embarrassed about anything having to do with nudity and sex or excretory functions but I was kind of just the opposite and they always seem to think that that was rather inappropriate.

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Guest AromaticPee

I have a story for this...

On a certain semester, during high school, Stella and I got into the same gym class. We both loathed the subject, but for different reasons. During warm-ups one day, we had to do butterfly stretches, and Stella made a lot of uncomfortable noises. I waited until afterwards to ask her what was wrong. "Ohhhh..." she moaned. "Clover, I don't think I can go on much longer..."

"Me neither..." I said to her. "I mean, PE is a really strenuous class. It's only natural for me to feel out of place."

"Uhhhh... yeah," she stammered. "That makes perfect sense. After all, who doesn't want to spend the day indulging in your fantasy?"

I noticed her clutching her vulva and twisting her legs while moving her butt this way and that. "Stella," I asked, "would you mind telling me why you're doing... that? I think I have an idea, but I want—"

"*gasp* Clover! You really shouldn't be asking those things!" She continued potty dancing. "I'm just tired, that's all!"

"...then why are you shaking your butt?"

"I can't... UGH. If I tell you, you gotta promise to leave me alone."

"Well, Stella fella, I can already guess... you don't have to tell me what's troubling you."

"...Just help me get to my destination."

"Deal, but you gotta show me something that'll do something with my suspicions."

"...Fine. I'll let you in on it once we're there."

Then we headed over to the nearest bathroom. It was quite far, but not so far that Stella would wet herself before we got there. "Okay, Clover," she said, "I have to go."

"Go?" I repeated. "Go where? ... I'm not trying to be dense or anything, Stella."

"...Isn't it obvious?!" She hopped in place before really squeezing her vulva. "I have to..."

"Pee?"

"...yes..." she whimpered. "I really have to peeeeeeee..."

"Um... so do I. Why don't we pee together?"

"...Okay, Clover. Let's get it over with." Then we headed into the men's room. Stella moved in front of me, pulled her panties down, exposed my penis, then sat on the urinal, facing me. "...Clover, there's something I want to tell you."

"Um... do you wanna suck my—"

"No, Clover... I... I love you!"

"Awww... well, what can I say besides 'I love you too?'"

*pssssssssssshhhhhhhhhh* "OOOOOOHHHHHHH..." We peed on each other and moaned aloud. It was just pure delight and wholesomeness disguised as a golden shower... beautiful, smelly, and warm.

"Oh my god, Clovie-wovie... I feel so good right now..."

"Me too, Stella fella!"

"Aaaaaahhh... my body is quivering right now... and I'm peeing right in front of you... the apple of my eye..."

"Stella fella, you're so beautiful... *sniff sniff* and even more so when you smell like pee!"

"Eww..." she cooed.

"Sorry, Stella. I just like pee that much."

"Me too..."

"Then why did you say 'ew, gross?'"

"...I didn't mean it!" She laughed, and I joined in with her.

After we were done peeing, we washed our hands together, with our privates still exposed. "Whoops!" Stella said. "Better get these baddies back under our pants..."

"Yup," I responded.

We covered up our genitalia. "...wasn't that relieving, Stella fella?" I asked her.

"Yeah..." she answered, "and also embarrassing."

"...good. I like it when girls are embarrassed yet happy." We laughed for about a minute. Then we went back to class... just in time for today's activities!

The End.

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@Raziel

"Maybe for people who grew up 30 or 40 years ago, but I've heard so many women say "I NEED TO PEE!" out loud in the last 20 years that it seems to be normal behavior now."

True that was definitely the case for my parents and my families generation but certainly not for me. I'm 38 so I guess I'm sort of in that generation raised by people who had that attitude still for the most part though. I still think that there is a fair segment of the population who simply refuse to acknowledge that women have biological needs such as going to the bathroom, as absurd as it sounds,even if deep down they must know the truth!

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I don't think it is inappropriate.  I think that from a guy's perspective, one may wonder whether a woman is excusing herself just to get away or to actually use the bathroom.  I think announcing dramatically "I NEED TO PEE/POOP!" without being comfortable with someone could be seen as inappropriate however in my own opinion.  But then the same is true for a guy who thinks it's hilarious to describe his needing to use the bathroom in such crude ways.  

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Impolite is not it. It's rather.. mauvais tone. Ladies with proper upbringing are used to hold their pee home. Announcing their need to someone else? Scandalous is what it is.

My first date with one lady lasted some 6 hours, and she wasn't coming from home, so it was probably even longer since she urinated last. And she had tea before the movies, and likely something else before then. Never she announced her need, or excused herself to the restroom, nor displayed any of those signs of desperation. Another girl I talked to admitted to be super shy about this around guys, and that she's only able to go together with her female friends. So when they're out drinking together in the company of males, she often holds her pee home, and after alcohol there's quite a lot of it...

And then there's other type who'll announce their need upon the first urge and literally squat in a metre away from you where they're barely covered. More tomboyish and less ladylike. It shows it's not about "society", but always about individual women.

By the way, this complicates things when looking for desperation content. Because you would normally assume she wouldn't consider the bushes or generally outdoors - only as a very, very last resort. But she might as well be not the "proper lady" kind. So it's kinda hard to tell.

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10 hours ago, DesperateJill said:

@Raziel

I still think that there is a fair segment of the population who simply refuse to acknowledge that women have biological needs such as going to the bathroom, as absurd as it sounds,even if deep down they must know the truth!

So for the record: You, a female of the species, excrete waste from your lower region like males of the species?

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This theory goes way back to the 1800's and who knows how far back. Women were covered head to toe. They wore dresses that went all the way to the floor, and they wore multiple layers of undergarments, making urination difficult and impracticable. Therefore they just had to hold it all day, until they got undressed, unless they were  home. Otherwise they would likely get their outfit wet.

I remember a couple of decades ago PBS did a series where they put volunteers in a nineteenth century setting. What they had to work with varied depending on their modern day station in life There was a late teens female who didn't like the extra work . In one scene she complained about the difficulty going pee with all the heavy clothes she wore. She admitted not wearing underwear so she could just let go. She stepped off screen and let go. She must have been standing on a wooden platform of some sort. I briefly heard the unmistakable splattering  onto the wood, and she said there.

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I feel at one point, definitely and to an extent alot of women still feel it is impolite. (Which it isnt)

I for one would like a girlfriend that loudly and proudly announces that she's "gonna go piss" I feel it is a stupid social norm that should be left in the past, like women always wearing dresses.

Edited by WetandKinky13 (see edit history)
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Actually, women should not have to ask to be excused.  They should just leave for the restroom as needed (unless they are voluntarily in a control-my-bladder game).  But the fact is that long long ago (when I was young), some would not attend to their bladders with strangers around.  I mean i dated a girl whose church told her to even be seen (other than by family) entering a bathroom.  But even then, a girls embarrassment about peeing mostly depend on her parents viewpoints.

In my childhood neighborhood, girls didn't let on that they could sweat.  So their only physical summer activity was swimming.  My omo cousin is something of a tom boy.  When she was

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@Raziel

"So for the record: You, a female of the species, excrete waste from your lower region like males of the species?"

Yes, frequently and often in large amounts!

@wettingman

"

This theory goes way back to the 1800's and who knows how far back. Women were covered head to toe. They wore dresses that went all the way to the floor, and they wore multiple layers of undergarments, making urination difficult and impracticable. Therefore they just had to hold it all day, until they got undressed, unless they were  home. Otherwise they would likely get their outfit wet.

I remember a couple of decades ago PBS did a series where they put volunteers in a nineteenth century setting. What they had to work with varied depending on their modern day station in life There was a late teens female who didn't like the extra work . In one scene she complained about the difficulty going pee with all the heavy clothes she wore. She admitted not wearing underwear so she could just let go. She stepped off screen and let go. She must have been standing on a wooden platform of some sort. I briefly heard the unmistakable splattering  onto the wood, and she said there."

I do think a lot of our modern day notions are still lingering carryovers from that era in which I imagine there must have been a great deal of female desperation!

@Stanley79

"Actually, women should not have to ask to be excused.  They should just leave for the restroom as needed (unless they are voluntarily in a control-my-bladder game).  But the fact is that long long ago (when I was young), some would not attend to their bladders with strangers around.  I mean i dated a girl whose church told her to even be seen (other than by family) entering a bathroom.  But even then, a girls embarrassment about peeing mostly depend on her parents viewpoints."

The women in my family are lie that, almost never using the bathrooms when others are around or in public. I did not take after them in that regard....

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I do agree that they shouldnt need approval for being excused. I don't think its necessary to tell what you have to do. That is your business but just say "Excuse me I have to use the bathroom." I do see why just getting up without just cause or without saying anything might be seen as rude. In a family gathering or a business meeting, leaving without a word might not be the best thing. But then again, it might be tmi to say "I have to use the bathroom" instead of saying "Please excuse me for a few minutes". May be at family gatherings, those that involve strangers (engagement party, a wake, or wedding) or a business meeting some might see this as being seen as rude. But I still think it should be alright even so just to say the above.

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23 hours ago, wettingman said:

This theory goes way back to the 1800's and who knows how far back.

The Victorians have a lot to answer for.

On 6/25/2022 at 9:02 AM, DesperateJill said:

I was just thinking about my other thread about social interaction when desperate and this suddenly occurred to me that I felt that in a subtle way, maybe not so subtle way in some cases, women are sort of politely encouraged to not mention their need to go to the bathroom until they can politely take care of it without making a big fuss about it.

Frankly, I think this is largely true because it's true of everything: women are subtly told they are supposed to subordinate themselves. To everyone, really: men, kids, other women... So this is true, but not bathroom-specific. And also ridiculously awful. The way that conditioning ties people in knots... it's horrible to see, sometimes. Which is why I totally agree with this:

 

16 hours ago, WetandKinky13 said:

I for one would like a girlfriend that loudly and proudly announces that she's "gonna go piss"

 

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