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female How to get past bladder lock


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Hi everyone,

Does anyone have advice for my cis female partner and me about how to work on her "bladder lock"? I'm not sure if there's another term for it. Basically, she's interested/willing to indulge my omo interests, but has not been able to pee anywhere other than the toilet or shower/bathtub.  We've tried to get her full enough to need to pee when outside the bathroom -- e.g., on the bed, tied up against a door, sitting/kneeling on the floor -- but she can't just can't go. As she describes it, part of what happens is the feeling of urgency/discomfort itself actually makes her bladder "lock up" if she's in a "unacceptable" place to pee. (This is with no one else in the house, so there is no possibility of being literally observed my anyone other than me.) Clearly there is a big psychological element tied to lifelong programming about where she can/should pee. She says she's always had trouble even going out in nature.

Any advice from anyone who has experienced this, or had a partner who did?

 

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8 minutes ago, Mariner62 said:

I found it quite difficult to wet myself at first.  The first few times, I finally ended up sitting on the toilet with my clothes still on.  Once I got past peeing with my clothes on a few times, I was then able to start wetting in other places.

Thanks! We've almost exclusively tried this without clothes (or without any clothes that would get wet during peeing), but maybe doing what you describe would help because works on breaking the social programming.

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Mariner62 is absolutely correct . She has to overcome years of training and social norms that say you must not pee in your pants. It is just wrong etc..

She may want to try sitting on the toilet in her panties when her bladder is very full.  Just relax forget she is wearing panties  imagine herself peeing . She should not try to force her pee out her bladder will fight her and lock up just relax , take all the time she needs.  Just let it happen.

Once that works she can move up to peeing in her pants over her panties standing in the shower.  Just relax be paitent it will happen. It may take several times but dont worry about it . Let it happen. 

Slowly running water into a sink or something mimicking the soumd of urinatiom may help.

At first she may just pee a little but it will happen eventually. 

I can say from experience although I did it the hard way, the elation I felt as that first wet spot appeared in my jeans. 

 

 

Edited by wettingman (see edit history)
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I think you have to do several things to unlock it.

first: that she practices alone, without necessarily being present no one else, this because she may not know it, but the nerves of getting wet for the first time are always present, added to the fact that she will have a little shame and sorrow inside, this makes the strongest blocks. 

second: to try little by little with the feeling of getting wet, that if the problem is that you can't get wet because you feel clothes on or that it is an uncomfortable place that you try to force yourself, to drink a lot of water and exert force, and I don't mean to put up with a lot but by force to urinate, to urinate on oneself by force, squeezing the bladder. If the sensation is still from the place where you urinate, try first sitting on the toilet with your pants up or your panties on, little by little until you get used to it, first peeing in your panties, then in your pants, when you get used to it to try it in the shower (preferably to practice urinating on yourself when you are about to go to the shower every day) and with that little by little your mind and body will be able to react to the need to pee whenever you want no matter where or if she has clothes or if someone observes her.

third: this is more something that I did, and it is trying to copy what I see in a video, in my case the first times I urinate in my panties I look for videos of men peeing in their panties, beyond the fact that I am heterosexual and only see omorashi content of women, I just tried to copy and assimilate in my mind that I was that person who was peeing in the video, and at the same time trying to synchronize with the moment of getting wet, I went back and watched again how he started to get wet until I started to have my own leak (with a bit of my own strength) and then the rest started to come out.

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It might also be some ki d of performance anxiety. I'm very comfortable with wetting myself but still i can sometimes get that pee-lock when i'm about to wet with my partner. It has to do with both arousal and that he's waiting for me to do it. It usually works after a while but little by little, not everything at once.

What you could try if this is the case is that you get out of the room for a while or just focus on something else than waiting for her to wet (maybe wetting yourself?) Or, if she likes the idea, leave it up to her to  wet around you some time when you're not expecting it instead of setting it up. 

Also, getting the mind off the wetting instead of concentrating on it might make it easier to pee,  like patiently talking or reading for a while until there's an urge that you can just let happen.

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Another vote here, for giving her a moment of privacy to get more used to the sensation. 
 

It should be easier if she really is desperate to go, and perhaps just in panties. Given some privacy, and a safe place (sitting on the toilet - panties still on) she might hopefully be able to relax and let it happen. Then more and more practice will help make it more natural and easier to do! And she can experiment more places. 

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On 6/20/2022 at 7:27 PM, WetterMesser said:

Also, try searching "rapid desperation" on this site. It should make her so desperate that she can't hold it.

This seems like as good a place as any to say that I've experimented with "rapid desperation" and have found that it 100 percent does not work. It does cause your bladder to fill more quickly, but it does not have any impact on your ability to hold it. So if you're the sort of person (like me) whose bladder goes into lockdown mode when it's extremely full, you're not going to be any more likely to wet yourself, you're just going to be more immediately uncomfortable.

For what it's worth, although I'm sure there's an element of psychological conditioning, I think it's mostly just because of the natural strength of my bladder that I'm normally incapable of wetting involuntarily. I can, of course, pee into my clothing on purpose, but I imagine almost everybody has a hard time with it at first. If that's all you and your partner want, then I believe it's just a matter of breaking the psychological conditioning over time. As others have noted, probably the easiest way to release the first time is by sitting on the toilet in just panties and trying to convince your body that it's just a normal trip to the bathroom. Once you get used to the feeling of wet fabric against your crotch, it should be easier to reproduce that feeling.

But it sounds like you don't even necessarily want that, since you've said your partner is trying to pee somewhere "inappropriate" without clothing. If that's the goal, perhaps she could try starting to pee on the toilet/in the bathtub in order to "break the seal", then stopping momentarily and continuing on the floor. It's a lot harder for your body to say "don't pee here" when you've already started going.

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17 hours ago, ControlFreak said:

It does cause your bladder to fill more quickly, but it does not have any impact on your ability to hold it. So if you're the sort of person (like me) whose bladder goes into lockdown mode when it's extremely full, you're not going to be any more likely to wet yourself, you're just going to be more immediately uncomfortable.

Yes!! This is exactly what she has experienced. We didn't ever try the rapid desperation protocol as such, but we have keptbwaiting for "enough" fullness, which basically backfires for the reason you describe.

I like the break-the-seal suggestion too, I think that will definitely be among the things we'll try in the next session.

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This is contrary to my usual approach, as I love the desperation scenario. Perhaps she should not wait until she is painfully full, and wants the pain to end a thus rushes he attempt to wet. I suggest not pressuring her to try ( not saying you do) and definitely let her get used to doing it alone so there is no performance anxiety . Has she ever just peed on the toilet, sans clothes, in front of you ?

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