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Consent and pleasure in omorashi


Consent and pleasure in omorashi - poll  

76 members have voted

  1. 1. What are your personal requirements for consent in order to find pleasure in watching / reading about omorashi-content? (not talking about the legal aspect here)

    • The omorashi-part has to be consensual as well as the recording and sharing of it, in order for me to enjoy the content. (i.e. deliberate wetting for sharing purposes)
      18
    • The omorashi-part does not need to be consensual as long as recoring and sharing are given consent to. (includes consensually recording a real accident or forced wetting)
      20
    • It does not make a difference for my pleasure if any consent was given or not.
      18
    • I recieve the maximum pleasure, when I know that consent is lacking regarding the omorashi-part. (i.e. loss of controll > deliberate wetting)
      10
    • I recieve the maximum pleasure, when I know that consent is lacking regarding recording and sharing of the content. (i.e. real voyeur > staged voyeur)
      10


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Just wanna give my two cents in the form of a phrase I've really latched onto over the last few years: "consent is sexy." I've learned that, while there is a certain something about a "true voyeur" video, they're very difficult to enjoy once you view it in context. When that context is either "I didn't know I was being recorded and have not given express permission for this recording" or "I expressly did not consent to this recording", my feelings of arousal or pleasure or whatever are massively outweighed by feelings of guilt.

This is also a large part of why I've started paying for more content, particularly from individual models. If someone is selling a video on their own platform, or on a platform under their own name (or assumed name), then it's pretty clear that they consent to its existence and distribution. Plenty of these videos include 100% real desperation, even if it's a predetermined environment. I'll admit that I do find myself searching for outtakes, or BTS type videos, or anything that seems like things may have gotten out of control. But still, there's an important layer of consent there for me in that the model or studio is still putting it out there, rather than finding it on some virus-riddled tube site.

Overall I think the fascination with voyeurism and "real desperation" are a natural part of this kink, but that those of us who consume and/or create content related to it have a moral responsibility to make sure we're not hurting anyone. I've seen plenty of models put out realistic - even actually "real" - content that's indistinguishable from your best "shaky cam in the bushes" video. I also think that if you're specifically attracted to the fact that the subject of the video doesn't want it out there, then it's going to be increasingly difficult to find support, as you're basically looking for content that's explicitly illegal in many places. You certainly don't have my support, as I think those sorts of things cross the line between "healthy/harmless kink" and "hurtful urges." If you feel like that's what you're really interested in, then I'd wholeheartedly encourage you to seek therapy if possible.

Tl;dr I think consent is sexy and the lack of consent is unsexy 

Edited by brothacheese (see edit history)
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For me there has to always be at least an idea of consent for me to enjoy any kind of omorashi.  Because consent turns me on, just the idea of a person who is able to know what they are doing and why but they still enjoy it.  Anything that has an expressed or implied lack of consent is an instant turn off for me, because it just isn't sexy for every party involved not to be "in on it" so to speak.  In my mind it's like how can I get any pleasure from this if there is another person involved who isn't?  Having a strong foot fetish in general I have seen a lot of those voyeur kinds of videos online, and even those kind of creep me out now.  But there was a time when I was very lonely and angry where I might have felt slightly different about it, but still anything that is obviously non consensual has always just made me feel weird so I find something else to look at.

Edited by Oceanus
post was messed up (see edit history)
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And remember, we all see omo as something awesome and, in many cases, love engaging in it ourselves, but others see it quite differently. There are those that might be able to brush it aside or even laugh it off, but others might be embarrassed by it. (And some of us, like myself, would be really embarrassed to wet ourselves in front of someone even if we love doing it in private) Plus deliberately forcing someone into a situation to take sexual pleasure in their pain is wrong.

I do feel that people are missing out on how good wetting yourself feels, and it shouldn't actually be considered any worse than getting wet with water, but viewing pee to be evil and wetting to be embarrassing is something humans are taught at a young age and not everyone can get past that, and forcing a wetting on them is not the answer as any good feeling about it could be overridden by embarrassment.

Of course there's nothing wrong with fantasizing about such scenarios.

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I'll be brutally honest and acknowledge I never think about whether or not consent was involved. It's not to say I condone ignoring one's consent; it's just not something I think about when I'm anxiously looking for fap material to relieve sexual tension at 11 PM . The hotness of the content is what I pay attention to. Assuming said content makes me nut, I'm satisfied (or at least less depressed about being a lonely loser; you know what I mean). 

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Does this include consent from onlookers in a public scenario? I absolutely despise public wettings for the lack of consent from those who witness the mess. The mere potential of getting caught, such as wetting on a walk back home in the dark, is also enough to prevent me from really enjoying it whether that happens in the video or not. I'm aware the thrill of not getting caught is a pretty big drive for a lot of people, including in my own fantasies, but I can't help but worry about the unwilling accomplices. This happens to a lesser extent when reading stories of real public scenarios because I'm often too horny to worry about the consequences, if I realize them at all.

Back on the topic of consent from the person doing the wetting: Something designed to look like voyeurisms makes me uncomfortable even with the awareness that it's staged, but I otherwise don't pay attention to whether there's actual consent. I assume names in stories are anonymized whether the poster explicitly mentioned they censored names or not, so I don't worry about that either. I stop enjoying a video if I later learn it's non-consensual, which fortunately only happened once.

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@TomatoNLettuce

"Does this include consent from onlookers in a public scenario? I absolutely despise public wettings for the lack of consent from those who witness the mess. The mere potential of getting caught, such as wetting on a walk back home in the dark, is also enough to prevent me from really enjoying it whether that happens in the video or not. I'm aware the thrill of not getting caught is a pretty big drive for a lot of people, including in my own fantasies, but I can't help but worry about the unwilling accomplices. This happens to a lesser extent when reading stories of real public scenarios because I'm often too horny to worry about the consequences, if I realize them at all."

This is what I was thinking about in my previous comments. The way I see it if you are doing something out in public you can't really blame people for looking or maybe even taking pictures or videos, even if it's rude. When you are putting on a public performance you have to realize that you are out in the public exposing yourself, so although I might be self-conscious being desperate in public and being seen by others, I can see where some people could feel violated if people are watching, but I don't feel you can blame people for watching or even enjoying a situation like that as long as they were not the ones forcing you into that situation or causing it. I still don't feel it's a crime to look, especially seeing as they don't know the greater context of what is going on. But for most people witnessing a person desperate or wetting themselves it probably doesn't amount to a fetish thing and is probably not sexually arousing to them.

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On 12/23/2021 at 8:15 AM, DesperateJill said:

I still don't feel it's a crime to look, especially seeing as they don't know the greater context of what is going on. But for most people witnessing a person desperate or wetting themselves it probably doesn't amount to a fetish thing and is probably not sexually arousing to them.

If an onlooker discovers somebody doing sexual acts in public, I imagine they wouldn't be too happy. Accidents happen, but intentions can be obvious if you or somebody else is holding a camera pointing towards the accident. Or worse, if they recognize you having done this before! If they don't notice the sexual nature of the act, they may still be annoyed by or feel empathy for the person with the wet pants. Either way, I don't enjoy watching others disrupting strangers or risk doing that, most likely because I don't want to be in the shoes of the disrupt stranger.

My stance would probably be different if I wasn't so socially anxious lol. Most people would get over it quickly but I'm not one of those people.

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On 12/24/2021 at 10:30 PM, TomatoNLettuce said:

If an onlooker discovers somebody doing sexual acts in public, I imagine they wouldn't be too happy. Accidents happen, but intentions can be obvious if you or somebody else is holding a camera pointing towards the accident. Or worse, if they recognize you having done this before! If they don't notice the sexual nature of the act, they may still be annoyed by or feel empathy for the person with the wet pants. Either way, I don't enjoy watching others disrupting strangers or risk doing that, most likely because I don't want to be in the shoes of the disrupt stranger.

My stance would probably be different if I wasn't so socially anxious lol. Most people would get over it quickly but I'm not one of those people.

Thanks to your response I will likely make a new poll regarding these incidents... I wonder, what people would actually think in these kinds of situations...

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On 12/20/2021 at 9:19 PM, NotGraeme said:

Gonna be honest, when I think of this site the first word that comes to mind isn't "fascists".

I'm not 100% sure where that came from.

It came from the Fascists.

 

No, seriously, you know the rule that says the most vehemently anti-homosexual person shouting down the LGBs is the biggest Gay of them all? Apply that rule to the people crying "fascist!" and suddenly it becomes so true it's actually a law. Actually, the same people shrieking about any "ism" and persecuting their political opponents to death for holding evil beliefs are in reality the greatest champions of said evil beliefs.

The Nazis have successors, and they literally do this all the time, it never gets old for them!

"Accuse the enemy of what you yourselves are guilty of" ~ Joseph Goebbels.

Edited by Maryn (see edit history)
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On 1/1/2022 at 12:30 AM, Maryn said:

It came from the Fascists.

 

No, seriously, you know the rule that says the most vehemently anti-homosexual person shouting down the LGBs is the biggest Gay of them all? Apply that rule to the people crying "fascist!" and suddenly it becomes so true it's actually a law. Actually, the same people shrieking about any "ism" and persecuting their political opponents to death for holding evil beliefs are in reality the greatest champions of said evil beliefs.

The Nazis have successors, and they literally do this all the time, it never gets old for them!

"Accuse the enemy of what you yourselves are guilty of" ~ Joseph Goebbels.

I'm definetly using that quote elsewhere. Thanks for the explanation.

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I think about this a lot and have written about it on here before. As someone that is turned on by the accident side of the kink, it's a tricky line to straddle. I can't help what turns me on, but I also have a very strong ethical code about consent.  I've written about how I deal with that in real life situations and you can find my thoughts on that in my posting history. Here, I want to address voyeur videos/photos of real life accidents.

Again, I can't help what turns me on. And a real accident with desperation and embarrassment tops the list. So, I do watch those videos. I am careful to only watch videos where the person involved is clearly under 18, but other than that I do feel that it is ethical and fits my moral stance. It comes down to whether the person involved at an expectation of privacy when they were being filmed. In most western countries anything filmed in a public space is fair game to post because the individual does not have that expectation when they are in public. They do when they are in a bathroom or in their home so those videos I do not watch.

The one thing I do want to stress is that what isn't cool is to interact with the person in the video by commenting or DMing them. They did NOT consent to you engaging with them in a sexual fashion (which you are, even if you try and play it cool with a "have you ever peed your pants before" type of comment. 

The bottom line to me is that so long as you aren't harming them by making them uncomfortable then you're ok. If you just watch and move on, you're not IMO. 

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Having just returned from a 30 day ban for breaking this rule myself, inadvertently (yes my post was quite deliberate, I’m not trying to make excuses for it, I just didn’t fully understand the rules - and then I got a bit cheeky about it, so hands up I was in the wrong), I’ve found this thread interesting to tread different viewpoints, and if anything it’s helped me to better understand why the rule is as “hardline” as it is, because it clearly has to be.

I think my previous lack of comprehension came from the fact Ono isn’t a sexual thing for me, so not a fetish in the true sense, it’s just an interest. But I realise that by sharing content here most people will be using it for sexual gratification even if I’m not, which means it becomes fetish content and therefore consent is paramount. 

 

Quick question from me, and it’s not about challenging the rules, they are what they are and for very good reason, I just want to understand where the line is drawn so I don’t inadvertently cross it in the future - although I will be much more careful sharing content regardless. 
 

The content I shared which was forbidden was a photo of somebody who’d had a genuine accident, and whilst they’d shared the image publicly they’d not given consent for it to be shared here for others gratification, and I realise now why that’s not acceptable. In a situation where a sportsperson has an accident whilst competing, for example, and it’s captured in photo/video format by TV coverage, would that still require their consent to be shared? And would the requirement be different if it was captured on a private video or photo  by a spectator, rather than broadcast media or press?

Thanks, and thanks for the education around the wider issue, it really helps. 🙂 

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As someone who is very curious themselves about the consent issue, I think Kozmo's handling of this is exemplary, by the way. It's difficult to be a strong community leader, especially on a forum like this that is so subtly nuanced.

I know that my own particular take on the kink straddles the consent line, which is a source of worry to me, and I started a similar thread about this not long ago (I was actually looking to wrap it up when I stumbled across this one). If I see a desperate woman about to duck into the bushes or squat at the roadside, it takes every fibre of my strength to turn away from the scene and I'm concerned that I might not be able to do it under certain situations, or that I might do or say something that turns me into a predator. I'd never cross the line into filming or photographing, though, which is an obvious breach of consent.

I think being hyper-aware of consent, where the boundaries are, and constantly alert for your own reactions is a reasonable place to be.

 

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