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malefemale Can’t Even Hold 1 Beer


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So this happened fairly recently. I (M30) perform a lot of open mic nights at bars. At this point in my life, I have completely come to terms with the fact that I have a small bladder and a difficult time holding my urine. Anyway, I travel upstate to this bar I haven’t been to (by the suggestion of a friend of mine). The place is small, but the crowd is real cool and they have a great vibe.

The owner loves the artists, and gives everyone a free drink. I reluctantly take the drink, downing it fairly fast.

And that was the catalyst to my shame.

Within a few minutes, I realize that I won’t be able to perform if I keep holding. I’ve got around another 20 minutes before I go on, and the situation already feels urgent.

Unfortunately for me, the performers waiting area is an unfinished basement with no bathroom. Realizing this, I kick myself for taking the one drink, and kick myself again for not having the bladder control to hold one drink. I start to do the math in my head and try to assess my limits, but the intensity of what I’m already feeling is clearly going to be a problem if I don’t address it.

Tucking my tail between my legs, I waddle up the stairs and ask the bartender where the bathroom is. The bathroom, unfortunately, is a single stall, and I’m absolutely stressed out that someone is in there. I’ve already embarrassed myself by coming out early in front of a fairly packed crowd of people, and ambling straight to the bathroom.

To my immediate joy (and disappointment in hindsight), the bathroom was completely free. I ended up taking a piss so good that I shuddered. The kind you hear a guy deeply exhale for. I don’t know how much longer I could’ve held on for, but in that moment, the pressure was gone, and life was good.

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I've performed open mic a few times too and been in similar predicaments. Because of the drinks and because of the waiting!! You often don't exactly know when you are going to perform and no one wants to be called to the stage when they are pissing at the toilet! And when that happens you hold It and hold It and get more and more impatient until you're a called and after that you frequently have to rush! And as you say you often have to wait in line because there is only one stall. I've experienced and witnessed some hard desperation at open mics.

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