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Do you guys ever feel judged when going to the bathroom?


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I was wondering if anybody else here has this problem or if its just me.

For me like im actually kinda scared to go pee during a movie or on an airplane because everyone knows what your doing. I sat through a 3 hour flight once without getting up. That was not the most pleasant flight ever. 

Im also the type of person to hide my urge because I dont like people knowing I need to go so maybe that has something to do with it.

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Ooohhhh yes, I used to struggle with this so hard, basically my whole life until I was 23. Then my job made it impossible for me to be shy and I had to get over it pretty rapidly; my line of work has me in incredibly close quarters. I totally understand though. I used to be the type of person to put an apple core or coffee cup in my purse instead of getting up in front of people to throw it out. I think this behavior is tied to my anxiety disorder which I've since gotten a much better handle on. I still don't like people knowing that I'm getting up for the restroom on like, a plane or something but at least I can actually do it now. 

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Hmm, not anymore. Until I got older I was very hesitant to go to the toilet for various reasons. This did sometimes end in accidents and not the pleasant ones...

Nowadays I usually don't care much about what others think. Everybody has to go at some point...

But I can guarantee you, there are many people with the same problem.

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I’m pee shy also, this prevents me from going for the same reason, I don’t like people to know I need and that’s strange because we all go so why do I think this way?

I used to hate it when I was jiggling but too shy to mention my need when an older adult would notice and ask me if I was needing the toilet, I would be horrified and deny it at same time trying to hold it in without jiggling to hide my desperation, I’ve had a few close calls denying myself relief as too shy about it,

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5 hours ago, SoBursting said:

I used to hate it when I was jiggling but too shy to mention my need when an older adult would notice and ask me if I was needing the toilet, I would be horrified and deny it at same time trying to hold it in without jiggling to hide my desperation, I’ve had a few close calls denying myself relief as too shy about it,

This is literally my favorite scenario in the world. There's something about the multiplied anxiety of having to go, but then having the simple fact of having to go *also* be embarrassing (admitting you have to interrupt the activity because you can't wait) so you try to deal with that too as it ramps up in intensity. Just delish. 😍

But I also tend to feel the same way, so I guess relating to it is also a big part of why I like it.

Edited by AliasnameTO (see edit history)
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This is a big part of having a shy bladder for me; The times I've tried to go in a public restroom that had other people in it, I end up thinking they're all fixated on how I can't get myself to start going and thinking there's something wrong with me. Of course, that just makes it even more difficult to let anything flow. I know that, realistically, no one's paying attention and no one cares, but reminding myself of that doesn't help stop the anxiety like I wish it would. 

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There was a time years back when all the worst possible incidents prevented me from exscusing myself to the bathroom until I was absolutely bursting I just had to say something, we were going to bars as 18 year olds enjoying this new freedom as adults, we left a bar where we met up on a Saturday afternoon having had a couple of drinks, we went to another place upon entering I knew I felt a slight need but did nothing about it some others went, we were shown to a bay where I was unwillingly herded into it being trapped by the others either side, I would need to ask them all to let me out to go to the loo that was daunting,

waitress service brought drinks, as we sat and chatted over the loud music I knew I was filling up more now and was dying to pay a visit but the girl to my right was engaged in conversation with me, I couldn’t find a moment to interrupt her without being impolite so waited more, food came hot Dogs etc, I didn’t order anything but someone did for me, I decide I have to wait now till the food is over, I’m bursting to go but wait for a less inconvenient time to ask to get out, why can’t I just say I need to go, they would understand... looks like everyone is done eating now and someone gets up to go this is my chance, I find the words to say I’d better go now also, the others shuffle up out their seats to let me out, I’m so desperate I’m numb, I can hardly walk to the men’s room, once inside I quickly undo the jeans and pee into a urinal for a long time.... 

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I feel that people around me judge the fact that I go to the bathroom everywhere I go pretty much all the time, and also judge me for using public toilets in general, as though it's like something sick and disgusting, but I think it's kind of something everybody needs to do at some point!

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I'm just like you. I know it shouldn't matter but just like how your (or maybe just mine) bladder clenches when you hear someone walk into the bathroom, it just feels naturally to not leave and go, especially when you receive lots of attention. Its a vicious cycle, you don't go because you think it'll be too awkward and then you get too desperate for your own good and the notion amplifies.

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On 6/22/2021 at 2:35 AM, WhenYouGottaGo said:

I was wondering if anybody else here has this problem or if its just me.

For me like im actually kinda scared to go pee during a movie or on an airplane because everyone knows what your doing. I sat through a 3 hour flight once without getting up. That was not the most pleasant flight ever. 

Im also the type of person to hide my urge because I dont like people knowing I need to go so maybe that has something to do with it.

I will not use the bathroom during the flight except for intercontinental ones taking teens hours.  It usually takes 6-7 hours from boarding to found a bathroom in the destination airport, sometimes to the hotel room. 

When I am out with others, I also try not to be the one who propose to use the bathroom. Sometimes my company seems following the same rule as mine, which will result in neither of us had visited the bathroom all day long. 

 

 

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On 6/23/2021 at 12:56 PM, April Nine said:

I'm just like you. I know it shouldn't matter but just like how your (or maybe just mine) bladder clenches when you hear someone walk into the bathroom, it just feels naturally to not leave and go, especially when you receive lots of attention. Its a vicious cycle, you don't go because you think it'll be too awkward and then you get too desperate for your own good and the notion amplifies.

Im weird, for me Im perfectly fine in a crowded bathroom. Nobody can see me sitting in the stall so I have no problem peeing away! But like if people can see me I lock up. I have posted a story on here before about it but I literally cannot go thru my swimsuit on the beach or in the water.

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The funny thing is I never had a problem expressing my needs. Whenever I had to pee I told everyone around me and announced it everytime it came to my mind, I was the person that went every 5 minutes whenever I felt the slightest urge, even if it caused inconvenience for others or they had to wait. I didn't even think about what others might think, it was just completely normal for me. Just as I didn't think about others having to pee, it simply didn't matter.

Until I discovered that I'm into omorashi about 4 or 5 months ago. I'm by the way only into seeing others desperate or wetting, I don't like to do it myself. But since then I'm extremely shy around having to use the restroom. It's like I physically can't get up or tell anyone I have to go. I feel like I have to pretend I do not have such needs. I see it as a weakness, think I make myself vulnerable when I tell others I have to go. Now I avoid peeing whenever someone might notice, if I have to I'll hold it for the whole day, rather than telling anyone and I find it weird when people tell me about their own needs, eventhough I used to do the same not long ago. 

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On 6/23/2021 at 1:56 PM, April Nine said:

I'm just like you. I know it shouldn't matter but just like how your (or maybe just mine) bladder clenches when you hear someone walk into the bathroom, it just feels naturally to not leave and go, especially when you receive lots of attention. Its a vicious cycle, you don't go because you think it'll be too awkward and then you get too desperate for your own good and the notion amplifies.

Same thing happens to me. I know that literally nobody cares, but I get so nervous when someone walks in. I cannot use urinals in that scenario. Once I really had to go in public and finally found a bathroom and I went to use a urinal when a guy walked in. My face went red and I was so nervous I was fumbling with my belt. It took a good couple minutes to finish, and during that time I was considering going into a stall instead, but I was worried that seemed weird too, so I pee danced until he finished (I could get away with pee dancing since their were dividers) and I finally managed to go.

On 6/24/2021 at 3:27 PM, WhenYouGottaGo said:

Im weird, for me Im perfectly fine in a crowded bathroom. Nobody can see me sitting in the stall so I have no problem peeing away! But like if people can see me I lock up. I have posted a story on here before about it but I literally cannot go thru my swimsuit on the beach or in the water.

Same thing for me! I was desperate after watching a movie once and I was totally fine using the urinal with a crowded bathroom but when it’s just me and someone else I have to hold it.

On 6/21/2021 at 2:35 PM, WhenYouGottaGo said:

I was wondering if anybody else here has this problem or if its just me.

For me like im actually kinda scared to go pee during a movie or on an airplane because everyone knows what your doing. I sat through a 3 hour flight once without getting up. That was not the most pleasant flight ever. 

Im also the type of person to hide my urge because I dont like people knowing I need to go so maybe that has something to do with it.

Airplanes are the worst. I can’t imagine trying to hide my urge while waiting in line in cramped conditions where everyone can see me. Lucky, the only flight I’ve been on was like 3 hours so I managed to hold it.

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Not really, unless I catch somebody trying to get a look at my junk while I’m at a urinal (I have to admit, not a whole lot to see down there, at least while flaccid, definitely a grower rather than a shower)

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Not something that normally bothers me but the worst is when there's been a long queue and now all the people behind me want me to get it done as quickly as possible and then it'll take me several minutes to get started as I feel all the stares on my back.

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I sometimes feel a bit judged by the frequency of my toilet visits. Like when I want to take a quick precautionary pee, or when they notice you go pee during every single break.

When I am in a pub drinking and talking intensely with a person I have this too. They are okay if I interrupt the conversation to visit the toilet. But when I have to do it again, and then another time again, they are like: what is it with this guy? So I mostly try to be very apologetic about it - in the case they would think I was totally bored by them! 😄

And of course long car trips with a group are a difficult one too. Often people have a sort of "schedule" in their head. And when that involves no pee pause, or maybe just one after like 3 or 4 hours, it starts messing with their schedule if you want more. Also, sometimes people are of the opinion that you only have a right to a pee pause if you really need to go badly. But I don't want to wait that long, because who knows what happens along the way. It wouldn't be the first time I courageously waited till it was "bad enough" to then be confronted with a traffic jam during those last miles before the gas station.

So yeah, I have had some discussions, big and small, about that in my life!

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