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The Covid Bathroom Divide: Has It Become Easier or Harder to Find a Bathroom in the Pandemic?


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I was originally posting about this in my worst jobs for women needing to pee thread but then I thought that it deserved to be it's own thread all of its own.


As most people have noted during Covid bathroom access has changed for a lot of people, with a lot of public places no longer allowing people to use the bathroom or lots of public bathrooms closing due to health concerns on a scale not seen before. However the converse is that a lot of people are now working from home meaning that they are home with the bathroom always right there, meaning that their bathroom access has actually IMPROVED as a result of Covid. But then again a lot of people when they are out away from the home have been finding it increasingly hard to find a place to relieve themselves, so it sort of like a duality I guess, where in some circumstances it has made relieving yourself easier, where in other cases it has made it harder.


As far as desperation sightings go the closing of bathrooms could result in more people being caught short without a bathroom, which could end up increasing sightings. However on the more practical terms the places being closed means that fewer people are out and about and going to large gatherings where there might be large bathroom lines, drinking and things that lead to desperation. For the most part I have noticed that as far as talking to others about their desperation sightings that Covid has seen a desperation drought, meaning that basically because fewer people are out and that fewer crowded places are open there has been fewer opportunities to see desperation, whereas most people are now at home where the bathroom is no more than a few feet away.


Now the situation is something I have been thinking about a real lot because of my own unique situation, which is somewhat ironic I suppose. The fact is even before Covid I was already practicing social distancing in that I barely ever left my house, spent most of my time at home with a toilet was just five seconds away, and even when I went out it was usually to someplace that was largely not very crowded such as an empty movie theater or a bookstore or something like that, meaning that the situations where I would find myself really desperate and wanting for a bathroom were relatively few and far between.


Then in a nightmare of timing I end up taking this job that is outdoors, meaning that for the first time in my life I will either be far from a bathroom or would have to rely exclusively on public bathrooms to obtain relief. However in the time between taking that job and starting that job the pandemic hits. So now when I am starting that job that's ironic because I am now out in public and outdoors at a time when everybody else is mostly retreating to their homes. But the terrible thing is that at a time just when I am first going to have to be using and relying on public bathrooms regularly is at the exact moment when, due to the pandemic, public bathrooms are closed on a scale like never before. So when I took the job the expectation would be that I would just use these bathrooms on site because they would naturally be open, except now because of the pandemic it seems increasingly they are closed closed closed. So many times I will go to a place where the bathroom was locked and occasionally there will even be a sign on the door that says closed because of Covid. I guess they figure that if people are not going out in public why bother maintaining public facilities like that? But the fact is that some people have to rely on those public facilities if they are going to be out all day, and now I just happen to be one of them, again great timing huh? My whole life I basically have always been a homebody and have always been right near my toilet, and now just when I have to be relying on public toilets it happens to be the moment when all the public toilets are closed and everyone else is now at home nearby bathrooms. Lovely, just lovely ain't it?


But now the added frustration of course is that I am a person who is involved in an omorashi community, several in fact, and a large number of my friends are people who are into omorashi. And of course a lot of them prior to Covid had jobs where they might not have had the greatest access to bathrooms and I just found that just totally hilarious and had endless fun teasing them over that fact. Well now it seems like a lot of them are working from home just like I used to be, and no longer am. Again timing is everything isn't it? They say that timing is everything in comedy and I guess for them, and for a lot of people following my story, this is just a total laugh riot.


So yeah now not only do I have a situation where I am out in public without a bathroom, but most of the people that I spend most of my time talking with, some of whom used to be in that situation myself much to my amusement, are now no longer in that situation and they are comfortably working from home with better bathroom access than ever, but the thing is I still interact with them, except the interaction is now very much the opposite of what it was before! So yeah a lot of those women in bad jobs where they couldn't go to the bathroom are now working at home and now I am the one with the bad job crossing my legs as I stopped in my tracks seeing the bathrooms that I need to rely on our closed due to the damn pandemic.


That is why I say that the pandemic has created a Covid bathroom divide. People who were once out and about in public and experiencing regular desperation are now at home where they have easy access to bathrooms, where as a lot of other people who are now out and about in the pandemic are finding it increasingly hard to find a bathroom when they really could use one. So I feel that Covid in many ways has flipped the world on its head, but one case that I think a lot of people haven't talked about is how it has changed the bathroom situation for a lot of people, with most people I think now finding themselves closer to bathrooms, and a somewhat smaller segment finding themselves farther from bathrooms and experiencing a lot more desperation, me being one of them in a total reversal of the way things used to be. So the universe decided that my karma would not only be that I would have to be out in the world relying on public bathrooms, but I would have to be out in the world relying on public bathrooms when they are all closed and most people who used to be in that situation are now at home comfortably using their bathrooms and having an amusing time snickering at seeing Jill in their previous less than ideal bathroom situation.


The good thing is that as Covid is starting to retreat more places are opening their bathrooms, so it's definitely not as bad as it was in the beginning. Increasingly a lot of the bathrooms that were closed are now being open again. But the problem is that a lot of the places I go for my job, such as parks and beaches and places like that, still largely have bathrooms that are closed. I guess they figure that large public places are places where people aren't gathering at current because of the pandemic so why should they pay to maintain them? So that is still extremely frustrating even though it is admittedly improving.


But the more frustrating thing, at least to me personally, is that a lot of people who were likewise in sort of a shitty bathroom situation, no pun intended, are now moving on to greener pastures perhaps partially as a result of Covid. A lot of the people I have been communicating with over the course of this pandemic in the omorashi community are still now working increasingly from home or in places with good bathroom access, whereas a lot of them previously had not been in such a fortunate situation. Even my nurse friend, who is not into omorashi but who I used to tease about things like that, in another excruciatingly bad timing situation ended up retiring from her job on the exact day I got my job, again timing is a bitch.


In one of my other threads @John mentioned interestingly, and this partially inspired this thread, about how during the pandemic that although a lot of people are supposedly working at home that there are still a lot of people who are out in the field, such as yours truly, who are increasingly finding themselves caught short when it comes to bathroom access. However my observation, at least personally, and admittedly I base this on people I chat with primarily in omorashi communities, is that as a result of Covid it seems like a lot of people are actually in a BETTER bathroom situation than before, other than those who are again spending a lot of time out and about, like myself for the first time ever, again timing is a bitch ain't it?


So from where I am sitting, often with my legs crossed, is that I am finding my situation is that I am communicating with my friends in the omorashi community, often while I'm sitting at my job with a very full bladder wishing the bathrooms were open, is that most of them, the vast overwhelming majority in fact, are in pretty good situations bathroom wise, especially by contrast to me. From my standpoint the experience has been, at least as far as chatting with people during this pandemic is going, where I will be saying that I am really dying for a bathroom right now and ask if anyone is in a similar situation and those terrible words that are increasingly like a knife through my heart is "no Jill, actually I'm working at home and –"


So now as I sit there with my legs crossed all day, dealing with closed public bathrooms, sitting in traffic praying that we get back soon so I can relieve myself, fighting with my coworkers to be first in line for the bathroom when we do get back, learning to navigate my day around bathroom access and the lack thereof and to manage an increasingly full bladder while going about my daily activities, the majority of people that I talk to are drowning me in a sea of "working from home Jill" and from where they are sitting, often on the toilet itself while they are talking to me (again this is what happens when you have friends in the omorashi community that you might have teased mercilessly in the past) things are looking pretty nice for them and increasingly pretty frustrating for me. And the last thing I can think is that it seems like everybody is peeing but me. In the greatest drought of people experiencing desperation ever I seem to be experiencing the most desperation of my life. I have gone from that person asking "any women desperate today" to getting the response nope, how about you? And the only thing I can reply is you have no freaking idea and God how I miss how things used to be in pre-Covid times!


So now that I have had another rant about bathroom access, my question for anyone who got through reading all of this is that how have you found your bathroom experiences before, during and after Covid? Have you found yourself experiencing more desperation of yourself and others, or have you found yourself in a better bathroom position than you were before, one ironic result of a devastating world changing pandemic that has changed the world in so many ways, but at least from my perspective no way more than in regards to relieving yourself and finding a bathroom when you could so desperately need one.

And please for the love of God I hope that those who answer this will prove to me that I'm not the only person whose bathroom access is getting worse while everybody else's is getting better!

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Don't worry, it's definitely NOT just you! There definitely is a dichotomy with this pandemic - some of my friends have been making thousand times more than they've ever made with their business, where on the other hand there's people I know who have been laid off from 5 jobs within the year.

Even though everybody says there's a lot more remote work available, there's still a lot of in-person work like with trades and construction that have to be done that can never be remote. And I really do agree with you, I've seen one company close down all but one set of male and female bathrooms because they don't want to clean all of them properly anymore due to the pandemic.

It's really bad when the place you work doesn't even have a bathroom - I've done work on a water treatment plant at one location and they actually told me to go to a local cafe or mall to use the bathroom. Can you imagine that? Watching and hearing tonnes of water pouring through your facility and no washroom? I actually said "that's a nice joke" and he was like "I'm not joking". It was because it was a very remote location and the building had barely anything in it, just a few rooms with the machines for treating the wastewater and they wanted someone on-site to report if there were spills detected and such (makes no sense either, if there's only one person chances are they'll have to use the washroom eventually). That was only a few years back, but I genuinely feel like someone with IBS or any other medical condition would have grounds for a lawsuit.

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@John
"Don't worry, it's definitely NOT just you! There definitely is a dichotomy with this pandemic - some of my friends have been making thousand times more than they've ever made with their business, where on the other hand there's people I know who have been laid off from 5 jobs within the year."


Exactly, one of the main reasons I would not quit my job because it's basically for me aside from the bathroom situation and anyone who has a job in this situation should be thankful for it, especially seeing as I had never been employed for the previous 36 years of my life other than as a very poorly paid self published novelist. That's what happens when you become a writer, you get a job without bathrooms!


"Even though everybody says there's a lot more remote work available, there's still a lot of in-person work like with trades and construction that have to be done that can never be remote. And I really do agree with you, I've seen one company close down all but one set of male and female bathrooms because they don't want to clean all of them properly anymore due to the pandemic."


I fully understand this but I have noticed numerous trends. I have been talking to a lot of people about this over the past few days both here and elsewhere and really been giving this a lot of thought and I have noticed several trends during the pandemic that, particularly in my situation, are making me a little bit antsy to say the least!
This is where the divide issue really comes up in regards to bathroom related matters, particularly in regards to the omorashi situation that we are all concerned with. The paradox is that I think for most people the bathroom situation is actually getting better under Covid, but for people who do a lot of in person or outdoor work like me, the situation is getting much worse at the same time as everybody else's is getting better. Of course not having been in this situation pre-Covid I can't really compare it to that but I again think that my timing is just the absolute worst in that regard as is probably the worst possible time to be needing to rely on public bathrooms.


I've been talking to women, and men too, in this community I have consistently received the same answer that they have witnessed a lot less desperation of other people and have been desperate a lot less themselves. More people are now working from home than ever before or else working in places where toilets are more easily accessible and available. So the first trend is that less women are getting desperate and are closer to bathrooms than before the pandemic, and they are the lucky ones were benefiting from this trend.


Again however the exception is people like me who work outdoors where the situation is getting worse because the public bathrooms are closing and are probably going to stay closed well into the future, because like you said a lot of people don't want to maintain these bathrooms when nobody is going to all of these places. This is particularly true at big public places like parks and beaches and other outdoor places, basically all the places where I tend to have to go for work. Even looking it up online it seems like these are the primary places that are being closed and widely staying closed because nobody wants to maintain them. Even pre-Covid maintaining public bathrooms for outdoor situations that have nothing to do with business a lot of people were somewhat negligent about, now they are positively being disregarded pretty much all together, and I think that they will be some of the absolute last places to be open once everything finally does start opening again. And did I say that these are the bathrooms that I most rely on now, I think I may have mentioned that once or twice!


Even looking at a lot of guidelines that have been posted about public restrooms under Covid it seems the only solution they are saying is that if you are going to close a bathroom at say a park to let people know about it before hand, but if you are going to go to the park anyway or have to go to the park little good that does you if it happens to be closed. It seems like increasingly the advice as far as public bathrooms go home is that people should learn to rely on their bathrooms at home primarily and not to rely on public bathrooms. Now for people who are working at home and staying at home like never before with their bathrooms right nearby, that is of course wonderful, because they have the bathroom right there at all times, so again situation getting pretty good for them.


However this is of course a trend that for people like me, who are now forced to rely on public bathrooms when they are out and away from home all day, is a very very bad trend. Essentially what the public is saying is learn to do without public restrooms. But what they are really saying is for those if you rely on public restrooms tough cookies learn to adapt, which I have, but that doesn't mean that I am happy about it! And I think that trends like this, once established, can become long-term trends even after say what caused them started in the first place. So I could definitely foresee a situation that even long after Covid is gone this tendency towards not maintaining or closing public restrooms on a large scale and encouraging people to rely on home bathrooms is going to be an increasing trend, which again if you are in a situation where you now rely on public bathrooms is enough to make anybody start squirming in their seat!


So what do these trends mean from the standpoint of people who like to experience omorashi versus people who like to mostly watch omorashi and whatnot, particularly in regards to women who cannot relieve themselves outdoors as easily in most cases?


Well like what I have said is that increasingly over this pandemic there has been a drought of desperation sightings overall because people are staying home and are working from home and are near their toilets, like I said the trend is for most women anyway is that they are in better toilet situations than they were pre-Covid. So for people who prefer to have access to a toilet this is a good thing for them. For people who enjoy seeing others desperate however it's not such a good thing because sightings are now few and far between.


And I have experienced this firsthand chatting with a lot of people throughout the pandemic in the omorashi community. What I witness every time I go into chat or looking for sightings is that the majority of sightings seem to be at an all-time low. It used to be I would go into an omorashi chat room or something like that and people would have all these new desperate experiences to share, but now I hear frequently oh I am at home I haven't gone out I haven't witnessed or seen or experienced any desperation. So in terms of me getting to experience a situations I haven't heard that many experiences in the last year, in fact at an all-time low, which is rather frustrating and disappointing, as I think that most people here, since we all share the same interest, would agree.


What is the frustrating paradox that is the exception to this rule however is my particular situation. The irony is that during the largest drought of desperation sightings of other people that I have witnessed is that I have found myself in more desperate situations than ever before because I am in the exception category, the people who once had been at home but who are now ironically working outside out in the world relying on public facilities at a time when most people are not needing to at all, so you can understand the frustration.


So here's the Covid divide that I am speaking of in regards to desperation, particularly female desperation. Because of Covid the majority of people are experiencing less desperation and witnessing less desperation, however the paradox is that those who ARE still experiencing desperation are probably experiencing MUCH more desperation than ever before. The desperation burden has pretty much largely shifted so now it's mostly the women who are stuck outside relying on public toilets at this time who are bearing the greatest bladder burden, and it's quite a heavy burden to bear, heavy is the bladder that cannot release it's urine! Essentially at this point we are like the only game in town but if you happen to witness us in one of our situations you're going to see us in a quite dire state of desperation like you wouldn't before. So maybe from the standpoint of the omorashi community you are witnessing less desperation but when you see some of us who are bearing the burden of the desperation now you are seeing really great desperation, really frustrating and aggravating desperation, which I have to admit is the most entertaining desperation to witness and others but the most frustrating kind to experience yourself.


Again it's here that I find it hard to judge people for enjoying a situation like that when it is increasingly rare these days as when you enjoy desperation you can take whatever game you can get in town. However the frustrating thing is that I think that there are plenty of people out there who frustrated by the lack of desperation sightings are probably smiling when they hear about all of these public restrooms closing and all the frustration it's going to cause for people like me simply because it means at least they are going to hear some sightings of women experiencing some truly epic and dire desperation to liven up the desperation drought that we are all in.
In fact that's what a couple of people who have read my blog and my posts and who have followed my story have actually told me and might be why I have been getting more attention during this pandemic than before it. In a world where female desperation seems to be on the decline I think a lot of people are thinking, well at least they are some women who are still getting desperate and they are getting desperate like never before and bearing incredible bladder agony! When you are in an omorashi community experiencing a drought of sightings and experiences you'll always be happy to hear about a woman who is experiencing regular and frequent extreme desperation on a consistent basis. On some level it's nice to be popular but on the other level when you think of the reason why you are popular…


And yes this has overwhelmingly been my experience from chatting extensively with people. It seems like when I am going around the community or in chat room it's pretty much a case of if I asked if anyone else is desperate while I am getting is a course again of "working at home, we haven't seen anything, the toilets right there etc. etc." and people who use to have fairly regular or at least sporadic sightings are now reporting nothing at all. On the other hand I have something new to report pretty much every week almost now. I've gone from Jill the one who asks for desperation stories to the one who tells desperation stories, real ones, lots of them, constantly in an endless stream, pun slightly intended!


I have to admit it's weird going into a place and people asking if you are at work because everyone knows that you are Jill the girl who holds it all day (FYI I am at work and I am holding it right now). I can understand the draw, in a world where desperation is rare when you know that there is a woman who is consistently experiencing it you are interested to see what's happening with her. I know that I have at least a few friends and followers, including some women that I had once mocked in the past, who are now like it's a work day for Jill, we're gonna have a lot of fun now!


Now as a fan of female desperation course I totally get that, because if I knew another woman who was in my situation I would be flocking to hear her story as well if not take advantage of the situation to torment her, because in spite of all my experiences, well what can I say, I'm still me! Again I realize that karma is real now. But as a person who also likes witnessing and hearing about others desperate, to always be the one who is desperate now can be rather frustrating. And when you also have to deal with the practical implications of desperation, not voluntary holding, but actually having to navigate your day around a very full bladder, it can get rather frustrating to suddenly find yourself constantly in the opposite position to what you had previously been used to.


Like I sort of compared it to this. It's like imagine you are in a desperation club with 20 other women and every day they picked a new woman to be desperate and they rotated it. Every day 19 of those women would get to enjoy a different person desperate every single day, knowing that once in a while they will also have to be everybody's entertainment as well, which is a pretty good balance and a pretty nice club to be in. But now imagine you join this club and suddenly the club changes the rules where you are the one holding it every single day. Eventually you're going to get kind of frustrated that you are always the entertainment, always the one with a painfully full bladder while everybody else is relieving themselves and you just kind of have to grin and bear your situation. Over the long term it really certainly takes its toll mentally once you realize that is the new norm, and for me that sort of is like the new norm in the post Covid world, where as in the pre-Covid world there was a more equal distribution of desperation throughout society, now the desperation curve is slanted in one direction where you have most women now being quite literally relieved, but the ones who aren't bearing a very heavy bladder burden!


And the thing that has made this obsessed my mind so much lately is the fact that I think that this probably going to continue, the desperation polarization I guess you could call it. I think that increasingly as time goes on it seems like fewer women are getting desperate but the women who are getting desperate are getting really desperate really often on a regular basis. The desperation curve has skewed and I think it's going to continue to skew into the future where the women working from home increasingly are devoid of any real desperate experiences, while the women who are out and about in the world, like yours truly, are going to be experiencing regular and increasing desperate experiences over time and just sort of have to get used to that as being the new normal. And I kind of fate myself a little bit for the fact that I have already sort of accepted it as the new normal. Although it still a weird feeling to be in a desperation community and be the only one who has no choice but to hold it.


Now I have talked to a lot of people and a lot of people have said oh it's probably going to improve as Covid goes into retreat and things will get back to normal eventually. And while I think it's true that eventually things will get back to normal somewhat, I do think a lot of these changes are probably going to persist into a long-term future and become sort of the normal trend. Because even as Covid begins to retreat it does seem like more women are working at home with toilets and getting better bathroom access and less desperation, where those who aren't at home are finding themselves having to deal with desperation fairly regularly as the new normal as society starts turning away from public bathrooms and those who rely on them. And once again for someone like me who until just before Covid was always at home with bathrooms and now is out and about in the world relying on public restrooms for the first time ever it is really a major 180° turn, and even after all this time it still mind-boggling to find myself in this situation even though I'm sure that millions of other women are experiencing likewise. I have found myself in the women without toilet club that I had once mocked at the time when it's membership is at an all-time low but the burden is at an all-time high.


But last night when I was chatting about this with somebody I made a prediction and it will be interesting to see if I am right. Although I would like to be optimistic and think that one day I will be seeing women desperate and hearing about women desperate regularly while the extreme desperation that I am experiencing will even out a little bit or improve, based on all of the trends that I have just listed I really don't think that that's going to be the case. So when I think about my personal future in this post Covid world, and the future of desperation and omorashi in general, here's what I am actually thinking.


Given in the year since this has started things seem to have actually skewed more polarized than less I predict that a year from now, maybe even several years from now, I will still be freaking out and talking about these issues. I think that increasingly I am going to find myself a minority who is desperate in a community of people who enjoy desperation but who are not getting as desperate themselves, at least not publicly or unintentionally. I think that those women without a toilet access or frequently desperate in public, who admittedly I used to mock, are going to be an increasingly small group but who is facing increasing desperation on a regular basis and will end up being the central focal point of the omorashi community. I suspect that most of those women who once had had lousy toilet access that I used to talk to a year from now will probably be peeing at home while I will still be crossing my legs and holding it frustrated at all of the closed public restrooms. I'd like to think that things would be otherwise and that things will balance out a little bit more, but for the long-term I am be grudgingly going to admit that my strategy is that I'm going to have to learn to get used to being the one who is frequently desperate rather than hearing about others who are desperate. From now on I'm going to be the performer, not the audience, and it's still a very weird feeling I have to admit.


Anyone who thinks I am wrong please do share your thoughts as to why you feel that is the case. But for anyone who has been making these observation throughout the last year I am wondering if you are experiencing similar, noticing similar trends that I am. So far most of the people that I have talked to have confirmed this and that is what I base all of this on. I mean maybe I'm just being pessimistic and everything, but I am anticipating a future as a desperate minority in a world of, for the majority of people, less desperation overall.


"It's really bad when the place you work doesn't even have a bathroom - I've done work on a water treatment plant at one location and they actually told me to go to a local cafe or mall to use the bathroom. Can you imagine that? Watching and hearing tonnes of water pouring through your facility and no washroom? I actually said "that's a nice joke" and he was like "I'm not joking". It was because it was a very remote location and the building had barely anything in it, just a few rooms with the machines for treating the wastewater and they wanted someone on-site to report if there were spills detected and such (makes no sense either, if there's only one person chances are they'll have to use the washroom eventually). That was only a few years back, but I genuinely feel like someone with IBS or any other medical condition would have grounds for a lawsuit."


Oh believe me I can relate to that as well. In a lot of these locations where I work where the bathrooms are closed there are lakes and streams and running water, and at the beach of course there is the constant sound of the ocean crashing. It's like the perfect storm of misery when you can't go to the bathroom. That is why if the public restrooms at these places are closed to have relatively few options other than to hold it really.


Again when I first got this job I was told that of course most of these places do have bathrooms but that was before Covid it and all of these places ended up being closed. But even so they expected that most people who took a job like this wouldn't have a problem with going outside or what used to working outside, which admittedly I am not because prior to this the most time I spent outside was walking from the car to a building and that was about it! So yeah I am totally not an outdoors woman and I couldn't imagine anybody with IBS or any similar condition like that even considering a job like that or even wanting to spend much time outdoors in general.


@Will8724
"Public bathrooms haven't become harder to find for me as a result of COVID-19, but I have become less willing to use them. I have to be more desperate before I'll use one now vs. before the pandemic."


I'm actually the opposite, I'm not germophobic and although I require that the toilet be clean to use it when the choice between using a less than ideal toilet or holding it all day comes up I am a lot less picky! In fact right now I haven't gone to the bathroom in 4 1/2 hours and I just desperately wish that the porta potty on my job site wasn't locked right now because even if it was a filthy disgusting porta potty I think that I would probably not hesitate to use it!


@China Girl
I think that most people who don't have diapers as a fetish find it appealing to have to wear diapers just to do their job all day, but I suppose I can see the benefit because if you are a diaper fan you don't really ever have to worry about desperation seeing as you always have a toilet right in your pants. However to me the idea of going in my pants and sitting in it even in a really absorbent diapers just incredibly unappealing to me.

 

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  • 3 weeks later...

Maybe this should be another topic altogether but I thought that it fit in with what I was discussing here. I was discussing this trend in a chat room today and it made me think of something. Like I said because of Covid the trend is that more women are now having more access to bathrooms so that there are less women holding than before, but that the women who do still have to hold are being made to hold to much greater extremes, women like me for one…


So the question that comes up naturally is what is more interesting to fans of omorashi? Would you rather see more women having more frequent bouts of desperation but not very extreme, or would you rather have a smaller number of women who literally have to develop bladders of iron and steel just to get through the day experiencing extraordinary desperation on a regular basis?


I have a bad feeling that I probably won't like most people's answers to this question…

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1 hour ago, DesperateJill said:

So the question that comes up naturally is what is more interesting to fans of omorashi? Would you rather see more women having more frequent bouts of desperation but not very extreme, or would you rather have a smaller number of women who literally have to develop bladders of iron and steel just to get through the day experiencing extraordinary desperation on a regular basis?


I have a bad feeling that I probably won't like most people's answers to this question…

 

Hm what answers do you expect? I'm not really a big fan of either scenario because it feels like I get something at the expense of others. I know how it feels like when it's not about the fun part of desperation...

Sure I would certainly appreciate the sight but I would also feel somewhat guilty.

 

 

 
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@FluffySeal

From my chatting about this earlier most people would be willing to trade less desperate sightings for more extreme sightings of more extreme desperation, and I have to admit that I would have to agree with them, if I was the one observing not participating, but like I said in my opening topic I feel that the trend is in this direction, fewer women desperate but those who are are getting more desperate more frequently, so I am sort of preparing myself for the long term haul. I feel that by the end of this I will probably end up having a bladder of steel!

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On 6/6/2021 at 1:41 PM, John said:

 

It's really bad when the place you work doesn't even have a bathroom - I've done work on a water treatment plant at one location and they actually told me to go to a local cafe or mall to use the bathroom. Can you imagine that? Watching and hearing tonnes of water pouring through your facility and no washroom? I actually said "that's a nice joke" and he was like "I'm not joking". It was because it was a very remote location and the building had barely anything in it, just a few rooms with the machines for treating the wastewater and they wanted someone on-site to report if there were spills detected and such (makes no sense either, if there's only one person chances are they'll have to use the washroom eventually). That was only a few years back, but I genuinely feel like someone with IBS or any other medical condition would have grounds for a lawsuit.

That should be illegal. That's awful. I really hate portable toilets, but at the very, very least, they should provide those. I personally don't think I'd take a job without restroom access.

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On 6/28/2021 at 12:15 PM, 33applepies said:

That should be illegal. That's awful. I really hate portable toilets, but at the very, very least, they should provide those. I personally don't think I'd take a job without restroom access.

Yeah sadly and in my area jobs are extremely competitive, easily you'll get 500+ applicants within 48 hours of a job posting - sure people will say the majority of them are unqualified, but even if you filter it out there's still a lot of people and employers can be very choosey - and if you say even one word on how businesses can improve they'll fire you, my industry has no unions or protections.

So you get a lot of third-party water treatment people taking advantage and nobody wants to stand up against them.

The worst is when you have to do the contract for school as part of a internship, so my school administration was even threatening to expel me if I didn't take and do the job everyday, and when you tell them that the employer has no bathroom, the school would always side with the employer and not care about you (university and college is the worst customer service that I've paid for in my life lol, spend that tuition on an investment or something to relax with).

So I actually had to get a doctor to say I had to use the bathroom, and I gave a note to the school so I could quit the job without punishment and I even then I had to threaten to sue and told them I was going to tell the nearest news media what they were doing (of course I wouldn't sue or tell the news, but you have to threaten to do so otherwise they won't budge).

It's really a joke out there and it's slavery with extra steps.

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While the lockdowns were in effect it was probably a bit of both.  A lot of places were closed entirely (or straight-up went out of business like one of my favorite restaurants, which had been around since the 1950s) so that made it harder, but the places that were open, assuming they weren't filled to whatever their arbitrarily restricted capacity was at a given moment, you could almost guarantee there was a restroom available.  After the first couple of weeks of lockdowns, you'd have to be extraordinarily unlucky not to find a single available toilet in your typical open air mall in the United States.  Whether or not it's in the restroom for your specific sex or not, or a unisex/family restroom, is another matter entirely - I'm fairly sure a fair few secluded corners away from prying eyes and security cameras have seen their share of use in emergencies last year..

Edited by D0nt45k (see edit history)
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@John

I think we all like to think that we would be the one to stand up to big business or the powers that be but I think that when it comes down to it most of us are very meek. Although I talk a big game I was never one to challenge an authority figure and I tend to be very frightened by them in general and very shy about any type of confrontation with anyone.


So even back in my school when they had five stalls for 750 girls even though I am sure that most of the school was squirming, at least most of the female population anyway, I never heard anyone made a formal complaint or anything like that.


I think it just goes back again to my other thread about women being patient about waiting for the bathroom, but it could apply to men as well in situations like this. I think when it comes down to is most of us like to think that we would be the revolutionary but in most cases we just sort of quietly accept these discomforts with silent desperation, no pun intended!

@D0nt45k

I think that that was another one of the terrible things of Covid is that a lot of places that I liked to eat at closed down, and I have a very limited number of places where I really eat.

My situation more specifically though I think that the Covid had the negative impact in that a lot of the places where I go for my job such as parks and beaches and forests and other places that use to have open bathrooms basically now have been closed down due to Covid. Now it's becoming more common for them to open now that people are starting to go to places like these more often, and I still think a lot of places that there is a trend towards not maintaining them as much because nobody wants to bother cleaning them and everything. So once again it was really with me just really bad timing, that I had to start relying on public restrooms just when all of them happen to be closing.

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I've mostly stayed home.  To that extent easier.

But stores are keeping much shorter hours.  The first time I went to this town's mall, the closing time caught me by surprise.  I'd just started needing the restroom when the guards ushered everyone out.   So I crossed the street to my favorite bookstore.  Where the public restroom once was, a freshly plastered wall greeted me.  Then I discovered the stores surrounding the mall had changed their hours to match the mall.  With a wait at the transit center and a 45-minute ride home, I arrived with an unintentionally wet diaper.  Even though it does not show, I dislike sitting in my puddle.

So restroom finding has become much harder while out shopping.

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Here in the UK my usual habits were to pull up at supermarkets as I was passing in between visiting customers, and run in to pee.  During the height of the pandemic that became nearly impossible, because queuing limited it to serious shopping (considering the long time it took to get in plus not being able to justify entering the store for non-essential reasons, even though a pee might feel essential ha ha)

Now it's quite easy again, though the one way systems in place usually mean I have to buy at least something to get round to the bathroom!  So for me, generally, life is easier now and more like the good old days (2019!!)

So things here are a lot easier again at the moment.  In a few weeks I'm hoping to attend one of the first full capacity sports events since COVID and I'll be anxious to see how that goes with the bathrooms! 

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@Stanley79

"I've mostly stayed home.  To that extent easier."

Yeah this is exactly the point that I was getting at, since most people have been staying at home due to the pandemic they have had easier access to the bathroom. The irony and frustration of my situation is that even before this pandemic I was a big stay-at-home person who never pretty much left the house, so it's ironic that now that everybody is staying home this is the first time I am out and about in the world and for the first time relying on public bathrooms just when they all happen to be closed due to Covid. It was even a bigger blow to what I am used to because up until then I had been used to pretty much being able to go the second I felt the urge and never having to wait, and now I am having to learn to hold it as I confront bathroom after bathroom with a closed due to Covid sign on the door, a very cruel joke from the universe.

@rebeljaffa

"So things here are a lot easier again at the moment.  In a few weeks I'm hoping to attend one of the first full capacity sports events since COVID and I'll be anxious to see how that goes with the bathrooms!"

I hope you will let us know how that goes. I do kind of wonder that once everything starts opening again whether bathrooms was still functioning at their old capacity or whether social distancing will take some of them out of commission or the people will have stopped maintaining bathrooms on a larger scale like that. Although I do think that as Covid goes away things will eventually start getting back to normal, I do still worry that there will be just a new trend that stays towards less public restrooms and more encouraging people to rely on their own facilities at home, which of course isn't an option for people who are going to be out all day.

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I know just how averse most adults are to diapers. I have a friend who works for an airline and asked him about if any of the flight attendants did wear diapers, and he said that he wasn't aware of any who did, because if they did they were probably into wetting and kept quiet about it rather than telling anyone. Though he did have a super hot story about a flight attendant who was bursting during turbulence, and ended up dashing for the toilet in the airport spurting pee down her legs, leaving a trail behind her! I think I'd have actually had an orgasm if I'd seen that.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I have found it harder to find a bathroom during covid. The public toilets are still quite okay - in the beginning lots of them suddenly were closes, but now they are open again. But many toilets here are within buildings that used to have free public entrance. And now suddenly it's all regulated: no more than x persons, or the main door is locked and you have to ring to enter, or you have to prove you actually have to be there.

For example, I am following a new course. So I arrive there after a train trip in the morning, feeling the need of my morning tea that certainly had gone through me. In my head: ok, I arrive there, visit the toilet in the campus building and then go look for the place I have to be. But I arrive there and the whole group is waiting outside. The main  door is locked, entrance only allowed for students accompanied by a teacher. So we had to wait till the teacher from the course came down to allow us into the building.

Needless to say this caused some frustration! And I was not the only one. Many people came from a long distance. Two other girls were also complaining their bladders were full after an hour long car ride. Haha, the look on the teacher's face when she opened the door and a whole bunch of us first made a straight line to the toilets!

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  • 1 year later...
18 hours ago, DesperateJill said:

Well a year later I'm wondering if anyone has new observations to share. Fortunately now I'm back in a situation where I am at home with the toilet 5 feet away but I am wondering if there is anybody else out there who is finding themselves bursting because unfortunately it seems that Covid is here to stay for the long term.

Well, the current main variant is easier to catch but less dangerous, and most people who want to be vaccinated are by now. Not much is still closed (though it seems we're not getting all-night Wal-Marts back...) 

As for your bathroom situation, I do wonder this: when you first go back to that job after having not needed to hold it for a long time every day, do you find that your iron bladder is out of practice and it's harder to hold it for hours than it is when doing so has been routine for a while?

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@trekkie

"As for your bathroom situation, I do wonder this: when you first go back to that job after having not needed to hold it for a long time every day, do you find that your iron bladder is out of practice and it's harder to hold it for hours than it is when doing so has been routine for a while?"

Fortunately I am now free of that job and I am now pretty much home all the time right by my toilet again but when I was at my job I usually had a couple of days to recover after a long hold so it's kind of hard to say. Since then I haven't done much recreational holding so if I did a major serious hold I might be out of practice but I still think that my bladder has probably built up to a higher level just from all the holding I did in the last year or two.

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9 hours ago, trekkie said:

Well, the current main variant is easier to catch but less dangerous, and most people who want to be vaccinated are by now. Not much is still closed (though it seems we're not getting all-night Wal-Marts back...) 

As for your bathroom situation, I do wonder this: when you first go back to that job after having not needed to hold it for a long time every day, do you find that your iron bladder is out of practice and it's harder to hold it for hours than it is when doing so has been routine for a while?

All-Night Walmarts were already being phased out before COVID hit in order to save money as they were becoming too much of a hassle for corporate to deal with(I wasn't even aware all-night Walmarts were even a thing until recently as none of the Walmart stores near me ever stayed open overnight).

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2 hours ago, LifeIsStrange said:

All-Night Walmarts were already being phased out before COVID hit in order to save money as they were becoming too much of a hassle for corporate to deal with(I wasn't even aware all-night Walmarts were even a thing until recently as none of the Walmart stores near me ever stayed open overnight).

Stores everywhere are having problems hiring enough staff, especially at the wages that they offer.  The Walmart in my area is still open all night, but I hear that may not continue.  

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It's depressing that nearly 2 1/2 years since the beginning Covid is still with us now and probably will be with us as sort of a permanent feature, but one of the things it seems to change is that more people are still working at home now than ever before which means that they are close to their bathrooms.


It does seem like most stores are now opening and I haven't noticed people wearing masks everywhere, so although Covid is still out there I think that all of the bathroom closings seem to be lessening. It figures it was at the absolute worst just when I needed the bathroom for most of course, now that I'm finally home again with my toilet nearby of course now all of the stores seem to be opening their bathrooms again, figures!


I still suspect that women who work outdoors though in this environment are probably still facing a lot of desperation still due to Covid and that is what I'm most interested in hearing about.

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You know, at the very height of the pandemic it wasn't too bad, many bathrooms were closed but there were barely any people out so once you found one you were fine. But at it after that you had a spot where there were still many closed bathrooms but more people, even the men's rooms had lines too. Thankfully now it's not too bad most places are open but I'm still scared I still see many people getting sick still.

1 hour ago, DesperateJill said:

It's depressing that nearly 2 1/2 years since the beginning Covid is still with us now and probably will be with us as sort of a permanent feature, but one of the things it seems to change is that more people are still working at home now than ever before which means that they are close to their bathrooms.


It does seem like most stores are now opening and I haven't noticed people wearing masks everywhere, so although Covid is still out there I think that all of the bathroom closings seem to be lessening. It figures it was at the absolute worst just when I needed the bathroom for most of course, now that I'm finally home again with my toilet nearby of course now all of the stores seem to be opening their bathrooms again, figures!


I still suspect that women who work outdoors though in this environment are probably still facing a lot of desperation still due to Covid and that is what I'm most interested in hearing about.

It's off-topic a bit, but one thing I liked about post-covid is that everybody is much more clean and I get a lot less strange people shaking my hand or hugging me. I used to take many business trips to asian countries and I lived in asian-populated areas in North America, so I was used to seeing people in masks, it's very interesting how we adopted their culture. At the same time it's polarizing, I've had bad employers who flipped to the opposite side and would tell the workers "You need to take that thing off" if you wore a mask. One even said "You look like an alien".

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@John

"You know, at the very height of the pandemic it wasn't too bad, many bathrooms were closed but there were barely any people out so once you found one you were fine. But at it after that you had a spot where there were still many closed bathrooms but more people, even the men's rooms had lines too. Thankfully now it's not too bad most places are open but I'm still scared I still see many people getting sick still."

Actually the height of the pandemic was probably the worst for me because that's when they closed all of the bathrooms in really public places like parks which I happen to need so that was the reason why didn't get to go to the bathroom most of the time. And even after Covid die down a little bit those places still tended to be closed bathrooms most of the time. And the extreme frustrating thing is that you are right, fewer people were out, and I happened to be out just when everybody else was comfortably at home with their bathrooms 5 feet away! The is the exact point, most people were home and getting to go but those of us out in public were really saddled with the majority of the desperation burden.

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