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Telling Others Where the Bathrooms Are


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I wanted to relate an experience that I had yesterday. Yesterday I was once again my job and it seemed like there were no bathrooms at the place where I was again, even though the last couple of times I had gotten lucky and there had been bathrooms. Unfortunately for me I had to go to the bathroom rather soon and I ended up having to hold it all day and was really bursting towards the end of the day like usual.


One thing that was unusual though is that while I was desperate I was noticing that my other female coworkers seemed like they were a bit more, I don't know I guess you would say casual, like they didn't seem to show as much signs of desperation and they looked like they were a little bit more loose and easy-going compared to normal.


Normally at the end of the day we all race each other pretty much to get to the bathroom first but today my coworkers didn't seem like they were in as much of a rush while I was bolting for the bathroom as usual.


What happened is later I mentioned that I really had to go today even though I usually don't mention anything like that and they said something to me that was really just like a gut punch. They said I probably should have just used the porta potty.


That took me aback for a minute because I didn't know that the place we were at had a porta potty available! So I asked them about it and they eventually said that while they were out in the field there was a porta potty out there and they were just using that throughout the day. So the entire day while I was holding it I could have been using a porta potty to relieve myself, so that was very frustrating to know that there was a bathroom available that I could have been using that entire time!


But the interesting thing that this brought up is the fact that my coworkers never thought to tell me about the fact that there was a porta potty until I brought the question up later, and had I not said anything I might not have even found out about this fact.


But the thing is it brought up an interesting question, given that they knew I probably had to go to the bathroom all day, why did they not tell me there was a porta potty available? I mean to be fair I spend most of the day in the van alone in the back of the van while my rest of my coworkers are out in the field, so it's not like I am talking to them all day long, but seriously I think that they could have told me that there was a bathroom available, as I could have really used it the other day!


This goes back to another interesting thing though that I have noticed. I have talked to numerous men and women over the years and I always propose this theoretical situation, where as if you knew somebody was desperate and you knew there was a bathroom where they could relieve themselves would you tell them about the bathroom or would you let them keep holding it?


An interesting thing was that I found that more men than women would tell another woman where the bathroom was and where it was available. Women seemed less inclined to inform other women of the bathroom. Now to be fair it wasn't an unbiased sample, everyone I have talked about this with has been a fan of omorashi, so this might not be the normal reaction to a person who doesn't have the fetish. And since I'm posting this on omorashi board I am going to get a similarly biased answer, but my question is for all of you men and women out there, if you saw a desperate woman who needed a bathroom and you knew where there was one available, would you tell her about the bathroom being available or would you just say nothing and let her keep holding it so that you could watch her desperate?


Now I very much doubt that my coworkers are omorashi fans, they probably just never thought to tell me about the bathroom, but it does make you wonder why wouldn't they tell me about a bathroom like that? Now I'm always going to be a little bit suspicious of them I have to admit!

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I personally wouldn't tell. Not for kink reasons as much as an assumption that she knows already, or I'm misinterpreting signals.

Now if she says first she has to go, I might suggest it, but might wonder already if she would choose not to use a porta-potty because they tend to be gross.

So no I likely wouldn't tell because I'm weird and wouldn't want to embarrass her or myself unless the situation was very clear.

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I was actually thinking about and discussing the situation with someone and I thought that maybe I am judging my coworkers prematurely because it's never like I explicitly ask them about a bathroom, so unless somebody specifically brings it up it's probably not the thing that you would mention. In the same situation if I had found that porta potty and they had to go to the bathroom unless they specifically said something I probably wouldn't have brought it up either.

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@PrincessPeeach

I think that's actually some pretty good points, yes it's true that we really don't discuss bathroom related matters and stuff like that, but surely my female coworkers know every day that we end up running, racing like animals to the bathroom at the end of the day and that we all badly have to go. So I was just thinking, they were basically using a porta potty all day knowing that I was probably bursting and they never thought to tell me about it. I mean again it's not something that you would really bring up I guess, but I guess I just feel kind of like they were using this bathroom all day that they know I really could have used and they never said anything about it.


But again I can't really be too critical because situation reversed would I have probably said something to them, and the answer is probably no. But just the thought that they were interacting with me all day knowing that I almost certainly had to go to the bathroom really badly and never even bringing it up, it does kind of make you wonder…

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In general, I think people usually just don't mention bathrooms to other people when there isn't an explicit reason to. In a large majority of places, there's either marked signage or staff to direct people to the bathroom if they need it, and even though there are definitely places where that's not the case, I can't recall a situation where I've been told where the bathrooms were without asking.

For me personally, I just always assume that if a person doesn't use the bathroom or ask where it is, that they just don't have to go. There are hundreds of variables that affect how quickly a person's bladder fills up that even if it was a person I was intimately familiar with and I often paid attention to that (i.e. either an SO or a girl that I had a thing for and was close with), I wouldn't really think anything of it, and certainly wouldn't tell them where the bathrooms were without them prompting me first.

I would say it's unreasonable to expect people to pay as close attention to your bodily needs and functions as you do, especially since people are generally not open about those kinds of things in the first place. They probably just didn't think you needed to go.

Edited by Railgun-sama (see edit history)
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Once again all reasonable assumptions except one thing that is sort of telling though is that I think that my coworkers and I, my female coworkers anyway, I think that we all know that by the end of the day we all have to piss like horses. We may not say anything about it directly usually, but we know that by the end of the day that we all have to go. The thing is I was interacting with them throughout the day and I was explicitly noticing that they seemed more casual than usual, and I'm sure that they noticed that I seemed like I was showing the telltale signs of desperation like I always do, and yet they didn't say anything. Again you're right they might just want to be polite and most people will not bring that up explicitly, but it sort of a weird feeling thinking that they noticed that I had to go to the bathroom all day, that there was probably no way for me to know that porta potty was there, and they chose to say nothing. Again in the reverse situation I probably wouldn't say anything either so I'm not going to condemn them for that, but at the same time I feel like they must have known that I probably could have used that porta potty!

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I don’t think I’ve ever told anyone where a restroom was without being asked, or without the person at least letting me know they need to go. Even if I think it looks like someone needs to pee, I wouldn’t say anything since I know I’d be really uncomfortable if someone did that to me, and embarrassed that I’d been acting in a way that made my need obvious. If they don’t ask, I assume there’s a reason, like I’m mistaken and they don’t actually have to go, and are fidgeting for a different reason. 

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3 hours ago, PrincessPeeach said:

I would assume that an adult would ask. It seems odd and kind of unusual that I would just out of nowhere tell another adult ‘hey there’s a bathroom here’.

I don’t think most typical people are that attentive to others’ cues of desperation or even consider that an adult may be in a situation where whey can’t manage their own bathroom needs. It’s kind of demeaning to assume that they can’t. 
I mean certainly if I knew the adult had some issues(shyness etc.) then I might mention it, but for the most part, no.

I definitely don’t speak with my coworkers about their bathroom needs or habits or tell them where the bathroom is when we go to new places. It would feel weird. 

Maybe I’m a bit odd then. At work if I have a visitor or anyone new to our office comes I always tell them where the bathrooms are straight away as soon as I meet them. 

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I used to work at schools and colleges, as a student and later adjunct work so I'd be on-campus often. I often get approached by prospective students or other visitors like sponsors, volunteers, etc. so I'd often just tell them where I think the closest washroom would be.

There was one event where we were leading a group of prospective female students (our school wanted to get more women into computer and IT fields), we'd usually show them around the campus and our offices. I led one part of the event in the afternoon/evening or so, taking over after one of my co-workers finished with their morning activities.

After an hour into it, one of the women asked me desperately where the bathrooms were, then they all started nodding with her and asking too! I had no idea they were so desperate! Apparently they were doing their activities the whole day, also eating meals and drinking plenty of fluids outside to keep hydrated, and not one of the other profs or volunteers who was leading them before throughout the day told the women where the bathrooms were, they didn't even give them a bathroom break! You'd think they could've used the bathroom when they ate, but they told me it was mostly outdoor barbeques with no bathrooms.

Definitely some bad miscommunication between departments. But it was no problem, I showed them to where the closest washroom was - unfortunately the ladies' room there had only 4 toilets and the group was like 40 women, and there were other women not in our event attending classes nearby who needed to use it to. So there was a big line for like an hour, I wish they had told me sooner about their issue, but I guess the school and profs were intimidating. I took the chance to grab a meal and we all took a break after. I genuinely felt bad for the women, but the next closest washroom was in another building you'd have to take a bus to get to sadly! 

I'd always tell someone where the washroom is if I'm asked, omo is only fun with me and my consenting partner.

But when I used to work retail, not all the places had public restrooms (edit: they had "employee" washrooms only). So it'd REALLY suck because my bosses would explicitly tell me not to let any customers use the washrooms or else he'd fire me. Really sucks when the demographic of your store is for kids, so get a lot of parents with kids who desperately have to go who do not know any better.

I let one kid/parent use the washroom once and the boss said "This is your final warning, you do that again and you're going to the unemployment line," so in the future I had to tell them "sorry we don't have a public restroom" and the parents would get so mad and stressed and just leave immediately without buying anything, making a lose-lose situation for everybody. What do my bosses think, that we have military secrets next to the employee washroom or something? Sheesh.

Edited by John (see edit history)
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I definitely would never approach someone, whether they were a random stranger or I knew them, and say where the bathrooms were without being asked. Even if they looked desperate I would be mortified if I pointed it out to them and was wrong, or was right but they were embarrassed at being noticed. 

Also, generally I'm not going to talk to anyone without being explicitly addressed. If someone is fidgeting around like they need to pee but aren't actively asking or getting up to go look themselves, it's 100% not my problem or even my business. Same with any scenario, unless it's like, visibly an issue (i.e. someone's going towards a door and has their arms full of heavy stuff, then I'd go open the door without asking) I'm not getting involved in whatever the problem is. People aren't my favorite things at the best of times. Imo it's likely your coworkers don't think about your collective bathroom needs like you do because they're not into omo, so it doesn't occur to them the same way it does to you. They probably assumed you noticed the porta potty, or else that at some point you'd just flat-out ask. 

The only time I can think of when I'd tell someone where the restroom was without prompting is if it was someone who shares my kink, and I knew they were actively holding for me, and it was part of the game. Otherwise, it's every man (or woman) for themselves. 

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@Juliered

"it really depends on who has to! but it's more likely that I'll just enjoy watching! I can confirm that guys are more likely to help a girl find a toilet."

Once again I find this interesting as this is something I have consistently observed from chatting too many people. I chatted with someone about this and we concluded that partially maybe the reason why guys would be helping a woman find a toilet is that because they are hoping to win brownie points with the opposite sex, but I don't know if it's just that.


But yes one thing I have consistently noticed is that when it comes to bathroom access I think that women definitely are meaner to other women when it comes to desperation, particularly women who have this fetish anyway. Again it's an interesting observation that men seem to be a little bit more sympathetic to a woman in distress like that, where as other women seem to maybe sometimes more likely to take delight in another woman suffering bladder pain, and again I'm not saying that I am any different! In fact as I have said here before I do find it more entertaining when the woman in question doesn't want to be desperate and is aggravated by it, even though given my recent experiences I should be more sympathetic.

Again just an interesting observation, but maybe women are just more competitive with each other, but it does seem like when it comes to desperation women are more likely to enjoy seeing other women suffer than men are. Again very interesting. I actually started an entire topic about this as to whether women are cruel or two other women needing to pee.

@John

"After an hour into it, one of the women asked me desperately where the bathrooms were, then they all started nodding with her and asking too! I had no idea they were so desperate! Apparently they were doing their activities the whole day, also eating meals and drinking plenty of fluids outside to keep hydrated, and not one of the other profs or volunteers who was leading them before throughout the day told the women where the bathrooms were, they didn't even give them a bathroom break! You'd think they could've used the bathroom when they ate, but they told me it was mostly outdoor barbeques with no bathrooms.

Definitely some bad miscommunication between departments. But it was no problem, I showed them to where the closest washroom was - unfortunately the ladies' room there had only 4 toilets and the group was like 40 women, and there were other women not in our event attending classes nearby who needed to use it to. So there was a big line for like an hour, I wish they had told me sooner about their issue, but I guess the school and profs were intimidating. I took the chance to grab a meal and we all took a break after. I genuinely felt bad for the women, but the next closest washroom was in another building you'd have to take a bus to get to sadly!"

This is another interesting situation that I have observed inexperienced myself as well as heard others describe and I think it goes along with what I have said numerous times before, society kind of expects women to hold it and to not demand acknowledgment of their needs, even a very urgent need like the need to go to a bathroom, and it's interesting how the majority of women are very non-complaining about stuff like this, and I think sometimes until one other woman speaks up most of the other women might feel embarrassed or ashamed it asking even to have a very basic need like the need to urinate acknowledged. Almost like it's impolite for women to even admit that they have need such as the need to urinate.

Again I think it's societal condition, women are sort of taught not to complain not to speak up about their needs and to be accommodating and everything. So it actually is not uncommon to see a group of women going all day without something as basic as a bathroom without anybody speaking up, until eventually somebody can take it no longer and then finally when somebody finally mentions it all the other women are finally feeling like they have been given permission to acknowledge, yes I actually do need to use the bathroom.


And it's always interesting to watch because you will see women basically just going all day without complaining for the most part, well most of them might be very desperate to go, and then when it's like they finally get to go to the bathroom it's almost like a blessing pretty much, almost like the acknowledgment that they are finally getting to go to the bathroom is like giving them commission to say, yes I have needs and it will be really nice to have them that right now!


Like I said I've noticed it numerous times, you see a group of women like that going all day without speaking up or anything like that, and then when you finally do get to go to the bathroom it's like the women are overjoyed, like literally somebody has said it's okay for you to finally relieve yourself.


And I also find it interesting that women are generally very patient about these type of things, almost ashamed to admit that they have to go at all, which again could be more societal conditioning. But even when there is a long line after women have already waited all day you generally don't see like a riot in the bathroom line, you see all the women patiently and politely getting in line in an orderly manner and waiting their turn.


Which is not to say women are saints, because I think that once you get to go to the bathroom you don't care as much about the woman behind you and I think that there is definite competition for being first in line, but you see very few women who make a big fuss about the fact that they are stuck waiting and you see them lining up obediently like little soldiers.


Even a person like me I have to admit is no different. I have been in numerous situations like this where you see women in a group going all day without a bathroom, and although I am thinking, does anyone else need to go to the bathroom as badly as I am thinking that they must, you generally don't see anybody speak up. And then when you finally do get to go to the bathroom, even if your bladder is absolutely screaming for release you patiently and orderly get in line and wait your turn no matter how long that is.


Maybe this is worth a topic all of its own, but it is interesting, very fascinating to me how women sort of patiently and obediently, perhaps out of some type of societal shaming, suppress their needs and politely just grin and bear it even when men might be relieving themselves.

@astralis

"Also, generally I'm not going to talk to anyone without being explicitly addressed. If someone is fidgeting around like they need to pee but aren't actively asking or getting up to go look themselves, it's 100% not my problem or even my business. Same with any scenario, unless it's like, visibly an issue (i.e. someone's going towards a door and has their arms full of heavy stuff, then I'd go open the door without asking) I'm not getting involved in whatever the problem is. People aren't my favorite things at the best of times. Imo it's likely your coworkers don't think about your collective bathroom needs like you do because they're not into omo, so it doesn't occur to them the same way it does to you. They probably assumed you noticed the porta potty, or else that at some point you'd just flat-out ask."

I can relate as I am very socially awkward and generally do not talk to people that I don't know very well including to my coworkers. But I do consider it rather ironic that as a person who likes seeing other women desperate once again I found myself in a situation where my coworkers were relieving themselves and witnessing me desperate instead of the other way around.

"The only time I can think of when I'd tell someone where the restroom was without prompting is if it was someone who shares my kink, and I knew they were actively holding for me, and it was part of the game. Otherwise, it's every man (or woman) for themselves."

I think that this is a good point, especially for women and toilets I think that it is sort of an everyone for themselves situation. Nothing says this more than after a long day of not going to the bathroom and you see women when they finally get to charge for the bathroom. Like I said women will wait patiently all day but when it finally comes to get to relieve themselves it really is a survival of the fittest situation.

 

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On 6/4/2021 at 1:34 PM, DesperateJill said:

This goes back to another interesting thing though that I have noticed. I have talked to numerous men and women over the years and I always propose this theoretical situation, where as if you knew somebody was desperate and you knew there was a bathroom where they could relieve themselves would you tell them about the bathroom or would you let them keep holding it?


An interesting thing was that I found that more men than women would tell another woman where the bathroom was and where it was available. Women seemed less inclined to inform other women of the bathroom. Now to be fair it wasn't an unbiased sample, everyone I have talked about this with has been a fan of omorashi, so this might not be the normal reaction to a person who doesn't have the fetish. And since I'm posting this on omorashi board I am going to get a similarly biased answer, but my question is for all of you men and women out there, if you saw a desperate woman who needed a bathroom and you knew where there was one available, would you tell her about the bathroom being available or would you just say nothing and let her keep holding it so that you could watch her desperate?


Now I very much doubt that my coworkers are omorashi fans, they probably just never thought to tell me about the bathroom, but it does make you wonder why wouldn't they tell me about a bathroom like that? Now I'm always going to be a little bit suspicious of them I have to admit!

Hm, I'm not sure if I was ever in such a situation. Maybe once? I can't remember. But If someone would ask me directly, I would try to help. Otherwise I probalby wouldn't notice. If I'm at work my brain is very focused on that and cuts everything else out. Honestly that's the case most of the time. I'm not very hm, observant..? There has to be an obvious problem.

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Je pense que pour beaucoup de filles, voir une autre désespérée grandit et s'épanouit. il y a toujours des jugements entre nous, elle est plus grande, plus belle, ... résultat de pouvoir prendre le dessus et laisser une fille se dévaloriser (elle se comporte comme une petite fille, elle ne peut même pas se retenir, elle ne savoir se comporter en public, ...) c'est si facile !

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It was nice to know that there was a porta potty, although it would have been nice to know it was there instead of it just being hidden off in the middle of nowhere like that. I didn't exactly ask what condition the porta potty was in because I know a lot of them are less than clean, although if the choice is between using a less than ideal toilet or holding it all day I am considerably less picky!

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On 6/4/2021 at 7:20 PM, segaface said:

I don’t think I’ve ever told anyone where a restroom was without being asked, or without the person at least letting me know they need to go. Even if I think it looks like someone needs to pee, I wouldn’t say anything since I know I’d be really uncomfortable if someone did that to me, and embarrassed that I’d been acting in a way that made my need obvious. If they don’t ask, I assume there’s a reason, like I’m mistaken and they don’t actually have to go, and are fidgeting for a different reason. 

It’s a difficult one, @DesperateJillI would say in response to your daily routine if I have assessed the circumstances correctly that a bathroom is not always available so in this instance I would mention it if I had knowledge of it, I also agree that normally it wouldn’t be appropriate to tell someone where the bathroom is until they asked for it, but if someone is new to a place I would expect someone to be shown all the facilities, coffee machine, smoking area, toilets, fire alarm gathering point etc,

if you were showing signs of needing I don’t think I could offer to show you where there was a bathroom unless you asked first,

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I don't know if it's just because I have a potty brain but I am one of those people who always tries to identify where the bathrooms are the first time I arrive at a place. In fact usually I will go immediately and use the bathroom as soon as I arrive at a place if one is available. Everyone in my family knows that that's my routine, that I always go to use the bathroom upon arriving at a place and before leaving a place to the point where it's a joke in my family that everywhere we go every toilet in the place will eventually meet my ass!


So as soon as I arrive at a place I immediately try to locate the bathrooms. Often I am disappointed as I will go to the bathroom and find it is locked or closed due to Covid, but at least I know right away that I had better take care to be cautious because I will be holding it for much of the day. But even then I don't give up right away, if I arrive at the place in the bathroom was closed once I do have to go to the bathroom I will end up checking out the bathroom again to see if it is open, hoping that maybe I will get lucky. So far every time it's been locked on arrival it hasn't been opened later, but you never know if you don't check!


In this case though I spend most of my day alone in the van just getting occasional visits from my coworkers of stuff that I need to type up. So what was happening is while they were out in the field they discovered the porta potty and were using it all day to relieve themselves, meanwhile I was sitting in the van with my legs crossed. Again I can realize that I never specifically did ask is there a bathroom out there, but then why would I? Why would I suspect that there might just happen to be a porta potty out there that they could be using in the middle of nowhere. But needless to say I did feel annoyed thinking that while I was sitting there with my legs crossed all day they were regularly relieving themselves and never thought to tell me about it. But again I'm not going to condemn them because situation reversed I likely wouldn't have said anything either.


Actually I suppose this will probably diminish any sympathy that I might have generated, but partially the reason I wouldn't tell them about the bathroom or the porta potty is because I would enjoy seeing them desperate while I am relieving myself and getting to enjoy them squirming without having to squirm myself. So I suppose that again that the irony or the poetic justice of the situation is that it ended up with me squirming and holding it all day while they were relieving themselves and getting to watch me squirm. However I don't think that they are omorashi fetishists, and people are right that they probably just didn't think anything of it. I do kind of wonder if they knew my true thoughts on these matters if they would think that I was evil for enjoying watching them squirm!

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I certainly wouldn't just seemingly randomly tell someone where the toilets are, even if I thought they were desperate, possibly unless they were [i]so[/i] desperate that it was really really obvious. Otherwise I'd only tell them if they asked, because I'd expect that most people would just ask, or if I was showing them around for whatever reason. I know I'd be embarrassed if I needed to go but hadn't got around to it - someone telling me where the toilet was would just tell me that it was pretty obvious how badly I needed to go (been there, once!).

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1 hour ago, PrincessPeeach said:

I think the difference is that they weren’t likely ‘watching you squirm’. They probably didn’t even notice. I would imagine the reason they didn’t tell you about the port a potty is because they simply didn’t think about it, or even consider that you might need to use it. Most people (who aren’t obsessed with bathrooms or omo) don’t really spend much time considering the bathroom needs of other adults. 

I would also imagine that yes, if they knew your true thoughts on these matters and knew that you were purposefully watching them squirm, they might find that a bit evil. Or at least a lot creepy. 🤷‍♀️

Yeah, basically. My colleagues even know I wear diapers but it just isn't a big deal because most people don't care about other people's toilet habits. I'm just the cute girl who..."has a medical condition"...rather than a sex freak.

Edited by China Girl (see edit history)
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@PrincessPeeach

I agree and that is why sometimes I do feel kind of evil and where I probably do lose a lot of sympathy. Even when I am in a dire bathroom situation myself bursting at the seams my mind still thinks, oh how I would love to see my coworkers suffering along with me! So I suppose it was ironic that the other day that they found a place to go to the bathroom and were interacting with me with empty bladders while they were seeing me squirm. Again they probably wouldn't enjoy seeing me squirm the way that I would see them squirming, but I can't help but wonder if there was a little bit of vindictiveness or something. But I am probably overthinking it just because of my fetish.

For what it's worth today we are in the same place and that porta potty they discovered yesterday happens to be locked today. So it was open when I didn't know it was there and now that I know it's there it is of course closed. I guess once again as I would say that people would probably call that poetic justice.

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