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Have You Ever Discussed You Fetish With A Professional ?


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The Sudden Urgency thread struck a cord with me. https://www.omorashi.org/topic/63007-sudden-urgency/

I went to an urologist because of issues of sudden urgency and leaking. He performed tests and prescribed medication but the problem persists. I told him it gets much worse if I think about peeing because of a very slight urge. He said that part was psychological

That got me thinking. Does the pleasure part of my brain think I will enjoy sudden urgency that it occurs even if my bladder isn’t full, and I had not felt an urge a moment ago? I don’t really; I want my bladder to be full and to be able to control myself. My entire sex life, mostly solo is now pee based, having been alone for many years. You could say I am obsessed with it, both holding my own pee with an appreciative female,  ( in my imagination) and watching a female do the same Does it overrule my sensible brain part that does not want to experience this all the time ? I have forced myself to ignore these urges, and frequently the urge goes away, but not for long.

So what to do? I have to admit I have no answers. I can’t get the rest of me to overcome the mental aspect of this. I can’t bring myself to tell any doctor or councilor what I have enjoyed about needing to pee to the point of wetting my pants all my life, and watching females do the same. I have not played much with holding my pee and wetting much in months. However, I still enjoy thinking , posting and reading about the topic. It is my sex life,  and although greatly lessened as I have gotten older,  I am not ready to give up yet

>>>>Has anyone spoken to a professional about this, and if so what was their reaction. What did they say?<<<

 

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When I was in college a female friend who probably had overflow incontinence or urge incontinence and I shared several wetting experiences. We talked about some of them and when I admitted I liked doing she insisted I discuss it with a campus health center psychiatrist. When I described one recent event and how I really liked the feeling of a self-created desperation wetting his reaction was “WHAT?”. There was no further meaningful discussion. 

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I have gone to counseling for years. Sex has never come up except tangentially when wasin a relationship. I sensed her discomfort quickly. Since then, I have  for the most part,  been single for a long time we would be discussing my masterbating.

Omorashi is not mainstream sex, so as princesspeach said I wouldn't expect it to be on a list of sexual things a therapist might suggest. The reaction that scinosensation described is what concerns me. I wonder how many therapists are familiar with it.

To us it us a normal part of life that all should enjoy.

Thank you for your response 

 

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I'm a "professional" and I talk to myself a lot, so yes. 😁 (not a joke, I'm a licensed psychotherapist)

As a counselor or psychotherapist you should try to be non-judgemental when it comes to topics like sexual preferences. Actually you should be non-judgemental most of the time - your job is to help the clients find their way, not to force your own way onto them. So if as a client you have the feeling that your therapist/counselor is judgemental or avoids certain topics, talk to them and get this straight - and if they don't change their behavior, go to someone else. Most colleagues that I know are very open-minded, but of course there's always a few bad apples. Some of us have special education/training in treating sexual problems - if you manage to find a good sex therapist, those should definitely have heard about pee play.

My own experience as someone who's a therapist (and has slept with a few therapists too): most of us are more open-minded than the average Jane or Joe. So if you want to talk about your "weird" sexual desires in therapy, go for it! It usually makes for some fun sessions, even for the therapist... 😀

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I have to admit I have had mostly negative experiences with psychologists and psychiatrists probably because I have been institutionalized. I find that they are fairly judgmental and if you are a bit weird they sort of view you as insane. I feel like they are the enforcers of social norms so I really never willingly consult with a psychologist or psychiatrist and avoid them at all costs, and I certainly wouldn't bring up my pee fetish with them.


I did have to go to a urologist when I was younger though because of my frequent urination, so I think that there were psychological issues with me not being able to pee and being not so good at holding very long when I started school.

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"I have not found that at all. Having had close experiences with a family member who was ‘institutionalized’ I found the psychiatrist there to be nothing but accepting and kind, and incredibly patient. The nurses, not so much, but understandably since they were dealing day in and day out with an extremely difficult situation. But the psychiatrist was open and supportive and encouraged this person to (against societal norms) do what is best for their own mental health, and helped them with strategies to overcome the stigma of making that decision. The many community professionals (and there have been a lot) I have been involved with this person have been the same."

I'm glad that you had good experiences but my experience has been the opposite. Especially if you have lots of weird beliefs in the paranormal they will sit there looking at you like everything you say is the babblings of a raving lunatic. Honestly when I went to my psychiatrist after I was institutionalized she would just sort of be sitting there and then no matter what I said at the end of the day she is basically just like let's increase your medication, which never helped and just made me fat and I think, but can't prove, started my current stomach ills which started at the same time. I felt like she was more of a drug pusher than anything.


After that I was pretty much done with psychiatrists for good. The way I see it they didn't really teach me anything about myself that I didn't learn on my own from keeping detailed journals. I think a person is their own best therapist in most cases.

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A few years ago, I had a conversation with my psychologist about kinks and fetishes. And even though we were in a friendly setting, she gave me a very professional response to my questions about worrying about my actual mental state when I think about the darker and more taboo kinks that I have. In which case anything related to peeing or wetting or omorashi, falls under that category. I may have mentioned it directly too. And that's how I learned what the difference between a fetish and a kink is. and she also told me I shouldn't be afraid of those things because it's not like I'm going to actually do the darker ones in real life because my logical / emotional brain would not let me. It's just fantasy. Of course, omorashi is not a fantasy. And it doesn't affect other people, like some of my other fantasies and kinks. I don't have fetishes because I have no real attachment to objects. I indulge on a regular basis even right now as I write this. I'm legit just laying in bed needing to pee trying to decide if I want to pee in the bed or what myself before I get in the shower. Haha!

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I remember one young lady posting a link to a recording of a call she made to a sex therapist who had a radio show.  

I wish I could find that link again.  Will post it here if I do, but I think it was mentioned  in The Pool chatroom which would make it difficult to track down.

From memory, the young lady took a while to open up about her desires to see men peeing in their jeans and this was interfering with her relationships.  The therapist was very patient in coaxing this information out of her.  

She reassured the young lady that many men would 'eat this up with a spoon' and mentioned the tough corporate types who spend their working day shouting at people but in a sexual relationship they want to be the submissive one and be humiliated.  Hope I've got this right. She pointed out that a vanilla relationship would be no good for this young lady and that in the 21st century we have the means to find such partners with the internet.  She essentially encouraged the young lady to follow her desires, not to try to suppress them.

Interestingly, directly the wetting fetish was revealed, the therapist immediately asked if the young lady had suffered some such humiliation as a child.  The answer was 'no' but the therapist went on to explain that such experiences can often cause fetishes that involve wee.  She mentioned that a child who was made to sit in wet panties until they dried might experience a rubbing sensation from the stiff dried material then make the link between sexual feelings and wetting herself.

I have never considered employing the services of a therapist regarding my wetting interests as I don't see it as a problem that needs to be fixed.  Still, the thought of sitting there in a clinical setting and discussing such things with a complete stranger does make me feel rather uncomfortable.  

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On 10/23/2020 at 4:01 PM, scinosensation said:

When I was in college a female friend who probably had overflow incontinence or urge incontinence and I shared several wetting experiences. We talked about some of them and when I admitted I liked doing she insisted I discuss it with a campus health center psychiatrist. When I described one recent event and how I really liked the feeling of a self-created desperation wetting his reaction was “WHAT?”. There was no further meaningful discussion. 

I really complain you this is really a shit😰

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Thank you all for sharing your experiences. Certainly there are worse things you could confess than liking to hold your pee until you wet your pants.  We are not hurting anybody .I just never felt comfortable discussing sex especially something not mainstream . Even if unexpressed i wonder what they might think .

 Except for the psychiatrist I never disclosed that I am a nudist either. There is nothing sexual about this  She said I was an exhibitionist. I have not seen her in eight years.

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I remember this one person I talked to who is extremely into female desperation to the point where was a total obsession and was interfering with his life told his therapist about something like that, and she was mostly understanding and even mentioned a couple of time she was desperate in line for the bathroom.


But the way I see it unless it's interfering with your life in some way, or the fetish is somehow making your life miserable or causing harm to yourself or others, I don't really see it necessarily being an issue that you need to go to therapy over or bring up in therapy and is sort of just a private sexual matter between you and any potential partners who might share the interest with you.


I have never felt that my fetish indicated mental illness or anything. I have a lot of issues but my fetishes aren't one of them. The only issue is that sometimes I can get really carried away on fetish binges to the point where it's hard to focus on anything else, and I get really sexually frustrated over it, but other than that I don't see it as a major mental issue.

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You are correct. This became a thought because i have been seeing a urologist because my enlarged prostate has caused some retention and leaking issues . Last week I fully wet my pants , twice upon arriving home. 

The urologist said  such urge incontinence when I think about having a chance to pee, but had not had to go badly , are all in my head. I thought perhaps my obsession with desperation and wetting had caused an issue. I have not held for fun in a long time. I could not tell him that. That's what prompted this discussion.

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51 minutes ago, DesperateJill said:

I remember this one person I talked to who is extremely into female desperation to the point where was a total obsession and was interfering with his life told his therapist about something like that, and she was mostly understanding and even mentioned a couple of time she was desperate in line for the bathroom.


But the way I see it unless it's interfering with your life in some way, or the fetish is somehow making your life miserable or causing harm to yourself or others, I don't really see it necessarily being an issue that you need to go to therapy over or bring up in therapy and is sort of just a private sexual matter between you and any potential partners who might share the interest with you.


I have never felt that my fetish indicated mental illness or anything. I have a lot of issues but my fetishes aren't one of them. The only issue is that sometimes I can get really carried away on fetish binges to the point where it's hard to focus on anything else, and I get really sexually frustrated over it, but other than that I don't see it as a major mental issue.

I get more frustrated on not being able to share it with anyone (my wife in particular).

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1 hour ago, wettingman said:

You are correct. This became a thought because i have been seeing a urologist because my enlarged prostate has caused some retention and leaking issues . Last week I fully wet my pants , twice upon arriving home. 

The urologist said  such urge incontinence when I think about having a chance to pee, but had not had to go badly , are all in my head. I thought perhaps my obsession with desperation and wetting had caused an issue. I have not held for fun in a long time. I could not tell him that. That's what prompted this discussion.

I'm 69 and have an enlarged prostate, which has been checked out by a urologist.  I sometimes have leaks, typically either when approaching the toilet, when doing something physically stressful, or if I have been sitting for a long time, then a few minutes after I stand up.  I also sometimes have difficulty peeing first thing in the morning, but no trouble the rest of the day.  I've never been into holding although I enjoy casual wetting when I get the chance, and masturbate frequently.  So I don't think your situation is related to holding, or even particularly abnormal.

When the urologist asked if I suffered from incontinence, of course I just described my symptoms, but in my mind I was thinking "Suffer?  No, I enjoy it."

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On 10/24/2020 at 2:47 AM, wettingman said:

I have gone to counseling for years. Sex has never come up except tangentially when wasin a relationship. I sensed her discomfort quickly. Since then, I have  for the most part,  been single for a long time we would be discussing my masterbating.

Omorashi is not mainstream sex, so as princesspeach said I wouldn't expect it to be on a list of sexual things a therapist might suggest. The reaction that scinosensation described is what concerns me. I wonder how many therapists are familiar with it.

To us it us a normal part of life that all should enjoy.

Thank you for your response 

 

Hey, I don't know how old you are, but you don't really want to remain without a relationship do you?

I think you should choose - either a relationship is more important than omo - in which case just pretend you don't have the fetish - that was my choice.

Alternatively, find yourself a fetish website and use it until you find a woman you like who also likes wetting. Maybe you might even find someone here?

 

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I did once. I went to a whole bunch of therapy for a bunch of reasons as a preteen/teen. I asked my psychiatrist if I was "weird or unhealthy" for liking this fetish when I was about 14.  I was also questioning my sexuality/in the process of realizing my bisexuality and, for a lot of reasons, adults I could ask these kinds of questions to were far and few between, so I asked her. My psych was pretty nonchalant about it. She told me she had heard of plenty stranger fetishes, asked me a few questions about my experiences with it (I think trying to discern what I found compelling about it), told me I may grow out of it but I may not, and asked if it was bothering me or interfering with my day to day life. I told her I didn't think so, she said it was normal for me to have issues coming to terms with stuff like that at my age. Overall, fairly professional and encouraging. Weirdly enough, one of very few actual positive experiences I had with that psychiatrist. Looking back, she made the wrong call 9/10 times, but that time she was right. I'm glad she didn't introduce any additional reason to need therapy, at least that time. 

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