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Selling Your Soul in Line for the Ladies Room


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I had the nice idea of Satan being able to take souls from women in the bathroom line because some people are driven to such desperation that they would even willingly sell their souls just to get to the bathroom faster! I thought it was a nice idea for a story and I hope that you enjoy it as well. So without a further ado here we go. As always can also be read in my blog at https://desperatejill83.livejournal.com/

Selling Your Soul in Line for the Ladies Room
Sadie had enjoyed the concert even if the music was even louder than she was anticipating and her ears were still ringing. She wasn't about to miss a single moment of the concert just to leave to use the bathroom as she knew that the lines would likely be enormous. However by the end of the concert her bladder was basically ready to explode.
"Well maybe the lines won't be so bad, seeing as this is a big place and they even have indoor bathrooms that I'm sure are meant to accompany large crowds," Sadie said as she stood up and grabbed herself. "Oh my God I am ready to burst!"
Sadie ran as fast as she could hoping to beat the crowd but she could see that large numbers of people were bottlenecking her and blocking her way.
"Hurry up I really have to go to the bathroom!" Sadie shouted.
"So does everybody else!" a woman said as she pushed her way past Sadie and ran towards the direction of the building where all of the bathrooms were located.
Unfortunately for Sadie by the time she got to the building there was a line out the door, and her bladder was literally throbbing and aching in pain.
"I have to go so bad!" Sadie shouted as she crossed her legs and grabbed herself. Normally she wouldn't like to let herself be reduced to that, but she knew that she had to do something if she was going to manage to hold on and avoid pissing herself.
After five minutes of waiting on line with the line not moving a single inch, she knew she would have to do something drastic. Slowly but surely she made her way towards the front of the line, or at least where the line entered the bathroom itself, and tapped a woman on the shoulder.
"Believe me I would never normally ask this but I have a real bathroom emergency here and I'm wondering if I could quite possibly cut in line?" Sadie said with a smile.
The woman frowned and shook her head. "I've got news for you lady, every last one of us has a bathroom emergency here, so you're just going to have to go to the back of the line and hold it in and wait patiently like all of us do."
"But I'm pregnant!" Sadie said as the woman looked at her basically flat washboard stomach.
"Well you certainly aren't showing it," the woman said laughing.
"I'm in the really early stages of pregnancy would you believe?" Sadie said.
The woman laughed. "Well I think you are in the early enough stages of pregnancy that the baby is not yet using your bladder as a human punchingbag, a pillow or a trampoline, so unfortunately that means that you can wait in line like everybody else."
Sadie gritted her teeth and walked slowly towards the back of the line which had now grown longer since she had originally gotten on the line the first time. She was so far at the back of the line that she knew that there was no possible way that she would be getting to go to the bathroom anytime in the next hour.
Sadie stood there trying her best to hold it but she realized this was going to be a battle that she was going to lose.
"I can't wet myself in public, that would be humiliating, I would never live it down," she said as she shifted from foot to foot, staring towards the front of the line with her eyes bugging out of her head. She knew that as she was at a death metal concert that people there were probably a lot more understanding of deviant behavior like wetting one's pants, especially in line for the bathroom, but in an age of social media where everybody has a camera she knew that some jerk would probably make her go viral and she would be forever known as that woman who peed herself in line at a rock concert.
"Some line," the woman behind her in line said shaking her head. "I guess they didn't let you cut in line did they?"
Sadie shook her head. "Not a chance."
"Total bitches!" the other woman said as the two of them laughed.
"I'm telling you I would honestly sell my soul to Satan right here and right now if I could just go to the front of the line and avoid peeing myself! I would leave and try to find another bathroom, but I know that we are out in the middle of nowhere, so I don't know what I'm going to do. I feel like there is no way I can make it to the bathroom in time, no way I can hold it for another hour."
The woman behind her smiled fiendishly. "Would you really sell your soul to Satan just to get to the front of the bathroom line?"
"Absolutely," Sadie said as she laughed and stood there bending at the knees and gritting her teeth.
The woman smiled even wider. "Well then you are in luck, because I am the devil herself and I am here to make you an offer you can't refuse."
"That's really funny," Sadie said as she laughed nervously and looked ahead at the stagnant bathroom line that hadn't moved an inch.
The woman shook her head. "No, I wasn't joking, I really am the devil, and if you are willing to sell me your eternal soul I can make your dreams of urination come true."
"Okay this has to be the weirdest conversation I have ever had in a bathroom line before."
"I can understand your skepticism, but believe me I have collected a lot of souls in the bathroom line, more than anywhere else, it's the number one reason women sell their souls believe it or not, thank God for bathrooms designed by men, but don't thank him for anything else."
"Then why are you singling me out to make this deal to sell my soul? You could probably get any of these women's souls or a large number of them right now with the same offer."
Satan started laughing loudly.
"What is so funny now?" Sadie asked, not exactly amused at her situation.
"Nothing, it's just you are at a death metal concert, so most of these women, well I already have their souls. But simply going to a death metal concert doesn't mean that you are automatically damned, it just is that most people who go to one have already embraced me and my teachings. But you seem to like the music but are a genuinely good person and those are the souls that I want to collect the most. So what do you say, will you sell me your eternal soul just so that you can go to the bathroom and avoid public humiliation and a viral video on the Internet of yourself by wetting yourself?" Satan snapped her fingers and out of nowhere appeared a contract.
"Where did that come from?" Sadie asked.
"Like I said, I'm the devil, I have ways of making these things happen. If I need a contract to obtain a person's soul all I need to do is snap my fingers and there it is."
"You don't have to have this reviewed by a lawyer or something like that?"
Satan laughed again. "I am the queen of lawyers honey, now my time is valuable even if I have all eternity, so do you want to sell me your soul or not?"
"Okay I'll humor you and I will sign it," Sadie said as she went to sign the contract with a pen that Satan had produced, which looked like a bony finger and smelled of brimstone. "Wait a minute, I'm not doing anything like signing over my power of attorney or something like that am I?"
"No, you are not doing anything stupid like signing over your power of attorney or anything that's going to have negative consequences for your life, it merely states that you are willing to to sign over your immortal soul to me so that you won't have to spend an hour waiting in line for the bathroom and peeing your pants in the process."
"When you say it like that it sounds like signing over my immortal soul just to save time in a bathroom line sounds like something stupid." Sadie felt a spasm in her bladder. "But on the other hand I'm about to piss myself." She signed the contract.
"Excellent," Satan said as she snapped her fingers and the contract and pen disappeared in a puff of smoke.
Sadie was about to say something when all of a sudden the smoke cleared and she found herself standing at the front of the bathroom line.
"Hurry up, we can't wait all day!" the woman in line behind her said.
"Oh my God, it was really true, that woman was actually Satan, which means I must have sold my immortal soul simply to avoid a bathroom line! The implications of this are wide-ranging and are making me tremble down to the very pit of my soul, although that's maybe the trembling from me trying to hold my very full bladder."
"Are you going to give me a speech or are you going to go to the bathroom, because I could go ahead of you maybe," the woman said as she started moving towards the stall.
"Absolutely not, I sold my immortal soul for this, so I'm going to enjoy it!" Sadie said as she opened the bathroom door and ran inside.
As she went to sit on the toilet she realized that it was soaked with piss and that it was filled to the brim with toilet paper and other things that she would rather not think about. She went to flush it but it wasn't working.
"You have to be kidding me, I sold my immortal soul for this!" Sadie shouted as she shook her head. "You would think if you are selling your soul to go to the bathroom that you could at least have some quality control. But I guess that's why you shouldn't make a deal with the devil. On the other hand God made it really difficult for women to go to the bathroom easily in a timely manner, so maybe Satan really is the good guy, or the good girl in this case. Then again-"
"What are you doing, are you talking to yourself in there or are you going to go to the bathroom?!" the woman behind her said as she pounded on the stall door.
"Well it's not the best toilet in the world but it's better than peeing myself," Sadie said as she sat down on the toilet and began having the most satisfying pee of her life. "You know what that was almost worth the price of my immortal soul. I'm afraid about my immortal afterlife now, but at least I won't have to worry about that for many decades, and I will hopefully live a long and full life before that."
No sooner than Sadie had said that then all of the sudden the ceiling caved in hitting her on the head and giving her a fatal concussion as everyone ran out of the bathroom screaming.
It didn't take long for EMT workers to come and remove Sadie's body from the bathroom and proclaimed her dead on the spot.
"It looked like that ceiling was ready to cave in, but just think, it could have been any of these women in line, I guess in this case ironically enough the women at the end of the line were the lucky ones," the doctor said as she proclaimed Sadie dead.
When Sadie opened her eyes again she found herself in a place that smelled of brimstone. Annoyingly she also felt the fullness in her bladder had not only not gone away, it was stronger than ever. She looked around her and saw herself standing in an endless line snaking off into the distance.
"Where am I?" Sadie asked as she looked around.
The woman from before that she had signed the contract to came over to her. "You signed over your immortal soul to me, and unfortunately when the ceiling of that bathroom caved in and killed you that means that I immediately got to collect."
"So what, am I going to spend eternity boiling in a lake of fire now?" Sadie asked.
Satan laughed. "No nothing like that, hell is a bit more creative than that. Just sending people to burn in a fiery pit seemed rather uncreative on our part. That is why we decided that as part of the new management that everyone will have their own personal hell that they will have to endure for all eternity."
"So what's my personal hell?" Sadie said as she grabbed herself, feeling agonizing pain in her bladder.
"You're in it right now!" Satan said as he pointed to the seemingly never-ending bathroom line.
"A really long bathroom line, how long is this line anyway?!"
"For all eternity, it is never ending," Satan said as she laughed loudly. "And you can't step out of the line or leave the line ever, even though you will be seeing lots of people leaving the line to go pop a squat on the side."
Sadie also looked off in the distance and saw a men's room that was completely empty with men walking in and out at virtually lightning speed in a never ending revolving door.
"This hardly seems fair!"
"Well that's why you should never make a deal with the devil honey, have a nice eternity," Satan said as she walked away.
Sadie grabbed herself and looked at the never-ending line in front of her and thought to herself at least she would have an interesting philosophical quandary to deal with while she was waiting in line forever.

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Pretty good!  I've got a suggestion for another story with an ironic twist(partially inspired by reading your accounts of your new outside job)- a woman has an outdoors job which keeps her away from public restrooms for long periods of time and squatting outside is her only reasonable chance of relieving herself without peeing her clothes, but she's never been able to properly squat without losing her balance and she's too shy anyways, but fortunately(and unfortunately) for her she comes across an old bottle while cleaning up a park and it turns out to be a magic bottle with a Djinn inside it, the Djinn offers her one wish and Jill wishes she had the ability to pee outside, her wish gets granted but there's a twist-now the woman can ONLY pee outdoors and no place else, if she tries to go indoors her bladder won't release, which on the one hand means she can't pee herself indoors but on the other hand means that the moment she sets foot outside with a bursting bladder she will instantly lose control and piss herself, so now the woman must be careful drinking whenever she is going to be indoors for long periods of time and always be thinking about where she can relieve herself outdoors whenever she leaves(and while outdoors she searches in hopes of finding another Djinn who can undo the spell).

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