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Does anyone else find there bladder control is too good?


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I've tried loads of times to have a genuine accident/loss of control but have failed many, many of times. I seem to give up due to the pain and either end up going to the toilet, or purposely letting go. i was wondering if anyone else has this problem? My bladder control is excellent, and I can hold a lot for a long period of time. I get to the stage of being unable to stand up (due to the pain and pressure on my bladder) but get scared that i might be doing my body harm and give up.

Do i have to fight this urge and carry on? Will my body end up just letting go on its own, or is it a sign that it's dangerous? Also if anyone has any tips or challenges that will help weaken my bladder control, this would be a big help!

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Ugh. Yes. I hate it. I wish I could cut my capacity in half.

Eventually, you WILL wet yourself if you keep holding it. It's biologically unavoidable. The pee isn't going anywhere but out. However the stress it could put on your body is immense and you don't want to fuck around with your kidneys. It isn't worth it. If your control is too good, you're unfortunately kind of stuck with it.

The closest I've gotten to simulating a true accident is doing yoga while I'm really desperate. There are some poses that have you putting your entire body weight on your bladder. Yeah it wasn't a "real" loss of control but it was absolutely forced out of me despite my best attempts to keep it in, and it felt pretty damn nice. 

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I'm right with you. The best way to combat this in my experience is with something called the rapid desperation method, there's a thread dedicated to it I'll link here: 

I've also found that using this in combination with a "pre-hold" helps. basically you would use the method above, then do a hold til you're pretty close, let it out, and repeat for your real one. Your results may vary, as everyone is different, but that's my strategy anyway. Best of luck.

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13 minutes ago, Bulge_Lover said:

Ugh. Yes. I hate it. I wish I could cut my capacity in half.

Eventually, you WILL wet yourself if you keep holding it. It's biologically unavoidable. The pee isn't going anywhere but out. However the stress it could put on your body is immense and you don't want to fuck around with your kidneys. It isn't worth it. If your control is too good, you're unfortunately kind of stuck with it.

The closest I've gotten to simulating a true accident is doing yoga while I'm really desperate. There are some poses that have you putting your entire body weight on your bladder. Yeah it wasn't a "real" loss of control but it was absolutely forced out of me despite my best attempts to keep it in, and it felt pretty damn nice. 

Thank you for the response, It seems like we're in the same boat. It gets frustrating sometimes, but like you said, it's not worth risking bodily harm. 😞 Sigh, hopefully i'll have a genuine accident one day 😄 

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8 minutes ago, Metalholding said:

I'm right with you. The best way to combat this in my experience is with something called the rapid desperation method, there's a thread dedicated to it I'll link here: 

I've also found that using this in combination with a "pre-hold" helps. basically you would use the method above, then do a hold til you're pretty close, let it out, and repeat for your real one. Your results may vary, as everyone is different, but that's my strategy anyway. Best of luck.

That sounds like something I'm more than willing to try, thank you for showing me this! Reading the replies it seems to work for a lot of people, hopefully it'll do the same for me 😆

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I’m with you too, it’s incredibly frustrating having to basically knock out an entire day for drinking and holding. I think I’ve got it so bad because I’ve always been obsessed with hydration, so my body is used to dealing with vast quantities of fluid (~ 4 litres a day) even on a non - hold day.

I concur with what’s been said above re: Rapid Desperation. It does work eventually, but I find I need to drink 1500ml per hour for the first two hours and then 1000ml per hour for the next four hours (peeing hourly) before starting a hold. 
 

If I then drink 250ml every 15 minutes I’m normally getting desperate after about two hours and the damn bursts about an hour thereafter, about nine hours after I’ve started.

If you discover any tips to speed the process up, I’d love to know!

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Guest w92iasd

Same, I've recently been trying to tire my bladders out by holding for around 12hrs for a couple days then slamming it with rapid desperation but its still hard to get myself to even leak... maybe a bit more irritants and a bladder detraining or something

Edited by w92iasd (see edit history)
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Personally, even with rapid desperation I can’t lose control unless I do back to back holdings. BUT don’t give up!

I usually hold until lower back starts holding and then let go purposely. I keep drinking/holding for another two or three rounds and after that my bladder tires out and I get legit loss of controls.

Another note: The effects of rapid desperation take an hour or two to wear off after you stop drinking. So yeah, it winds up being a lot of time to devote to loss of control. I usually dedicate a full evening by myself for it.

Edited by Hintojo (see edit history)
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I've found this is incredibly mental. Going out and about while intentionally holding, and then coming home when I am quite full triggers the "keyhole syndrome" pretty well. I very rarely lose complete control doing this, but more often than not I experience at least one if not more significant leak(s) while pulling into my driveway or hustling into the house.

We're so trained to not pee our pants that the body simply will not give up the fight even when we're in significant pain. The only other way I've gotten around that mental block was unintentionally de-training myself. I wrote at some point in the past about a rafting trip I took down the Grand Canyon with some friends my age several years back. By the end, the combination of the outdoors, the river, the heat, and the convenience basically turned into everyone (guys and girls) peeing their pants at will whenever the urge hit without any judgment or repercussions. I found that after a week of doing that, I caught myself a couple of times starting to just let it flow while wearing real pants in real society, and I had to hustle to a bathroom to avoid a real accident.

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Yes, ive had this problem as a man. More so in my late 20’s and now at 30. Between like 15 and 25 I would push thru that pain and it would be fun and result in soaking myself eventually. Now, the pain is not as fun, a little bit different, and I only hold once in a blue moon.  I find that alcohol makes it “easier” and that I need to switch from sitting to standing etc

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I have also a very strong bladder and for me the best way to weaken my bladder is doing long intensive holds. 

The last time I was holding my pee for that long, that from the first drop of pee going in my pants, to finish my holding experience elapses 1,5hours. At first some drops came out then follows by small leaks and finally bigger spurts to complete losing control. During the hold I was keep drinking water that my bladder stays full. 

But the best part from that experience follows by the next day. I weakened my bladder so much that I felt like I'm urge incontinent. The desperation waves comes from "zero to I can't hold it any more" within a few seconds and I had no chance to reach the bathrom with dry pants.

This method works for me really good, but give your bladder time to recover after long holds like that. On the third day my bladder recoverd in a normal status. 

Maybe this method works also for many others.

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I agree with coffeedrinker that the block is largely mental. For me, I started off having trouble wetting at all, but once I started to give myself more challenges during holds it became easier to wet.

Try running water over your hands, listening to sounds of rain, sitting on the toilet fully clothed, purposefully relaxing all your muscles for a second, stretching your hands up to the ceiling, or jumping around a little. All these techniques have helped trick my bladder into thinking “pee time!” And have ultimately made it less uncomfortable for me to hold. Just do what works for you, and for a while you may need to let out a little leak on purpose to help your bladder along. Some bladders are more stubborn than others but I hope this helps. 
 

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Guest w92iasd

For some of you guys responding with advice: What would you say does better? Holding upwards of 16 hours but with a relatively low quantity (to get through daily life) or a shorter term, large capacity holding? 

Edited by w92iasd (see edit history)
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20 minutes ago, w92iasd said:

For some of you guys responding with advice: What would you say does better? Holding upwards of 16 hours but with a relatively low quantity (to get through daily life) or a shorter term, large capacity holding? 

There’s probably a sensible middle ground somewhere. Personally I can’t see myself being able to hold 16 hours even with minimal drinking, while drinking vast quantities over a couple of hours will at best leave you bloated or at worst be quite dangerous. 
 

As a starting point maybe try drinking 2 - 3 litres over the course of 6-8 hours (peeing whenever you need to) and then continue to drink liberally while you hold, until you can’t hold anymore.

Hope that helps but do DM me if you want anymore advice. 

 

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I have tried a few times, but in large part due to impatience I've never lost control for more than 10 seconds (and that was on a hold where I got lots of challenges, but it ended earlier than I intended).

Of course, it at least keeps me from having an unwanted pee accident, but I would like to experience a full blown loss of control at least once.

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Guest w92iasd
7 minutes ago, FallingDusk said:

I wouldn't say it's control rather than size for me, I just don't like how long it takes to get desperate, even when I drink obnoxious amounts of water .-.

 

Have you tried rapid desperation before? It fills you up quick and seems to give some people wettings although capacity itself won't work for me.

For me, its both control and size. I need both my control to be weaken and a large amount in my bladder to make me truly desperate

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The best thing I've found is back to back holds, preferably using rapid desperation. If you find yourself unable to lose control from one hold, empty your bladder (at least halfway) and start holding again. Most muscles in the human body fail after a certain "time under load", and your sphincter is no exception. It might take 2, 3, or even 4 holds, but if you're not giving your sphincter time to recover in-between, you'll eventually lose control.

You can think about it like any other muscle: it's pretty easy to hold a 5lb weight in front of you for 5 minutes, right? But if you try to hold it in front of you for 5 cumulative hours, even if you take tiny breaks, you're going to start to struggle. As far as your bladder/sphincter are concerned, successive holds are the same as one long megahold.

Edited by surrealexp (see edit history)
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