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How many in omorashi/omutsu relationships?


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9 hours ago, Velvet Touch said:

Just wondering how many of you are in relationships that involve omorashi/omutsu.

I'm engaged and whilst my other half knows about my fetish she's not interested.  Earlier in the relationship she tried a diaper with me a couple of times but she's since said she was just humouring me because she liked me and thought I'd leave if she didn't join in.

In short, my relationship is open about it but it's my issue and not "involved" in our sex play or together time.

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9 hours ago, Spurgle said:

I'd like to add one more thing, I do think some users of this site give too much importance to having Omo involvement in a relationship. Ultimately a relationship is a union between two people who care about each other. Can't be in the bedroom 24/7. 

That's kind of a broad sweeping statement to make about what people should prioritize in their relationships, don't you think?

Some users of this site have a hard time having enjoyable sex outside of their fetish. It seems unfair to say that if they want a sexually fulfilling relationship, they're overemphasizing their sexuality.

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Me and my SO are into dominance/submission, I'm the dominant, she's submissive and we've sort of engaged in it since she's told me that she's into it (for a long time it was sort of awkward and we weren't sure about it. She was into omorashi and omutsu as well, but neither of us knew, so, that was a relief.) but I'm not sure if she's already burnt out on it or what. We were discussing diapers too, but, for now, I'm not sure.

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11 hours ago, supernerd222 said:

That's kind of a broad sweeping statement to make about what people should prioritize in their relationships, don't you think?

Some users of this site have a hard time having enjoyable sex outside of their fetish. It seems unfair to say that if they want a sexually fulfilling relationship, they're overemphasizing their sexuality.

Not really - I mean sex is important to a relationship sure, but for it to be an actual "relationship", as in more than just meaningless sex for fun (which as long as everyone's consenting there's absolutely NOTHING wrong with, it's amazing! :wink:) the key is compatibility of personalities/spirit/whatever you want to call it. If you're not sexually compatible (like if you don't share fetishes) then you may not get as much out of the sexual aspect as a couple who are, but if you love the person then the sacrifice of indulging in your fetish only in private is just one of the many compromises that everyone has to make in relationships.

That being said, a shared fetish IS also a very good proof of compatibility if it's there, and if you can have a strong, loving relationship AND a wild and wet sex life, that's GOT to be the ultimate jackpot!! :grin:

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8 hours ago, LunasAuditor said:

Not really - I mean sex is important to a relationship sure, but for it to be an actual "relationship", as in more than just meaningless sex for fun (which as long as everyone's consenting there's absolutely NOTHING wrong with, it's amazing! :wink:) the key is compatibility of personalities/spirit/whatever you want to call it. If you're not sexually compatible (like if you don't share fetishes) then you may not get as much out of the sexual aspect as a couple who are, but if you love the person then the sacrifice of indulging in your fetish only in private is just one of the many compromises that everyone has to make in relationships.

That being said, a shared fetish IS also a very good proof of compatibility if it's there, and if you can have a strong, loving relationship AND a wild and wet sex life, that's GOT to be the ultimate jackpot!! :grin:

My observations have led me to believe that relationships between sexually incompatible people will eventually fall apart. Even vanilla people can find that they're not sexually compatible, and you see them get marriage counseling and divorces all the time. I think you're actually underestimating the importance of sex to a large segment of the population.

Lots of people people have this fetish, but they're still sexually compatible with vanilla people. Some people with this fetish just aren't. For the people that are, your advice is good advice. For the people that aren't, I think that pursuing relationships with vanilla people is ultimately futile.

I'm not saying that deep interpersonal connections aren't important in relationships. But sex is also important. I'd even argue that sex is partially responsible for the deep interpersonal connection: it dumps all these hormones into your body that foster intimacy with your partner. I'm sure there are people reading this thread that know they're never going to have a sexually fulfilling relationship with a vanilla person. I think their time would be better spent pursuing a relationship that has both personal and sexual compatibility than trying to make a fundamentally broken relationship work.

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@supernerd222 you may well (and almost certainly do) have a good point, and I'll admit I don't have a lot of experience in relationships, but I have to hold out hope that intimate relationships can be possible without sex being the be all and end all of things. Being Ace and not very sexually driven myself, I would need to be compatible with someone on a personal level above all else, and while I'd certainly enjoy a strong sexual relationship it wouldn't work (for me at least) if that's all it relied upon.

But I guess it kinda backs up your point - I wouldn't be compatible with someone too sexual, and you wouldn't be compatible with someone not sexual enough, and the combination of how much emphasis any one person places on sex vs their own level of sexuality determines the compatibility (I'm nerdy so imagining an X and Y axis here...) but it's still a question of sexual compatibility... And I suppose the overall relationship equation depends on the combination of several sets of similar X and Y compatibility variables (I'm not science-y enough to know what that would be called), including but not limited to interpersonal AND sexual compatibility... Aaaaaanywho, I'm getting weird again...

Also, I want a )ANY) loving relationship with a girl more than I want my left leg, so just don't crush my fantasy that it's remotely feasible for a non-sexual worm like me and I'll be fine! :tongue:

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My wife has been very accepting of my fetishes, and actively encourages pee and diaper play. She's completely understanding about it - and goes out of her way to make it work. However, as much as I would like it she'll never be actively interested in the fetish, which is 100% fine. Besides that our sex life is completely normal.

On 4/21/2017 at 0:35 PM, Spurgle said:

I'd like to add one more thing, I do think some users of this site give too much importance to having Omo involvement in a relationship. Ultimately a relationship is a union between two people who care about each other. Can't be in the bedroom 24/7. 

I disagree. For me, having my fetish in a relationship was extremely important. I went through multiple girlfriends who had no interest in it (completely within their right) until I met my wife. My fetishes are more then just kinks "for fun", it's a huge part of me, and because of that it's a huge part of our relationship. Obviously we care about each other, but a relationships is ultimately about the ENTIRE relationship, everything included.

 

Edited by razia (see edit history)
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My wife tried it for me and it did not excite her at all. When she was able to, she used to sometimes tell me she peed a little when I was going down on her, which she knows excited me.

I am sure she knows I am still into it, but doesn't bring it up. Because of her medical conditions, she is sometimes in adult diapers for long periods of time and urine burns her skin. I do get to regularly check any place she cannot easily see and, if necessary,  clean her (with no AB or DL or ABDL overtones).

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I'm another one who found a GGG (Google it) girl who really enjoys playing with my kinks.  She wasn't into omorashi or omutsu before me, but she was into power exchange (essentially dom/sub stuff).  She enjoys being subby as a little girl who sometimes wets her panties and diapers.  And we are both switches too, so sometimes I get to be the little one.

I definitely agree that sexual compatibility is extremely important to a long term relationship.  If I didn't make her happy in bed she never would have stayed with me.  Similarly, when I met her, I was at a point where I wasn't going to settle for anything less than tolerance of my kink.  I told her about it pretty much as soon as we started talking seriously about dating... that might have been a little early but it worked out for me.

So basically I see us kinky types as having three options for finding love if our kink is a requirement to our being happy in a relationship.  First, just date people and hope to get insanely lucky and find somebody who is compatible and has the same kink.  Second, search within the community, like here and fetlife.  And third, date, but make being GGG a requirement and just don't spend time on people who aren't.  The last has worked for me... I figure there are almost certainly a lot more GGG people out there than there are people already in the fetish, so the odds are better.

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My girlfriend is very into ABDL play and enjoys wetting.  Outside of anything kink related, she is someone I admire very much.  We have similar values, enjoy the same activities, and generally want the same things in life.  Even if she didn't share my kinks, she is someone who I would want to be with.

In the past I have dated women who shared my kinks, but were not that great of a match outside that.  I found those relationships to be unfulfilling. On the flip side, I've also dated someone who had very similar values and was otherwise highly compatible with, except that she had no interest in my fetishes.  That relationship left me feeling like something was missing.

I'm not sure that having a partner who shares my kinks is a relationship requirement for me.  However, I did learn that I can't just turn my back on my kinks and feel satisfied.  I need some sort of outlet for them.  Dating someone just because we share the same kinks hasn't worked out well at all.

Luckily, I happen to be in a wonderful relationship with someone who is the complete package.  I could not possibly be more satisfied with my relationship.  For those of you who haven't read it already, you can learn more about how I met my current girlfriend on this thread- 

 

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To start, I'm not into omutsu play, but I do enjoy some personal omorashi play and most porn I watch involves some kind of peeing.

I have not let this be known to my wife. She is a very reserved and shy person when it comes to sex. This is mostly due to here being a non-otaku Japanese woman. (Anime is not super representative of mainstream Japanese culture in my experience, but I'm also not a fan of the medium.)

Since my wife is shy to the point of not even liking to be seen by me naked unless she is deeply in the mood and she has a disdain for anything that she would relate to things that "creepy hentai otaku guys" would be into, I keep my fetish on the down low. 

She wouldn't leave me if she were to discover my fetish, but she wouldn't be comfortable with it.

I'll actually probably put my fetish on the shelf after her visa goes through (I had to move back to the states due to work and we weren't able to get a visa for her beforehand) because I would rather not partake in my fetish and keep my wife happy than have her find out and be less than happy.  

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I'm on the singles train. I go through relationships, friendship or otherwise like sand leaking from an hourglass. I guess I just haven't really found anyone that I really enjoy being around. I have a few friends but I honestly just don't care.

Also relating to the argument about sexual compatibility. I just find vanilla relationships boring. For one thing, when your job starts to involve your fetishes, it starts to make talking to someone a bit impossible.

"So what do you do for a living?"

"I uhh, well I uhh, write stories that are totally not pornographic in anyway what so ever. Nor do they involve diapers or anything kinky. I just write newspapers for people on news sites. And I have a gaming channel which does not involve video games that have anything to do with Omorashi or ABDL or anything. In fact I play video games about newspapers. I love newspapers!"

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Me and my boyfriend are really lucky to both be into omorashi together. Granted, he's the one who introduced me to it, and I'm glad for that. Now it's something we can both enjoy normally.

 

My advice would be to always be open about your fetishes to your partner (if you trust them) early on. And, who knows?  They could at least be open to the idea. They might even have some kinks of their own they'd like to try. 

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On 4/24/2017 at 8:05 AM, thunderbunny said:

I'm another one who found a GGG (Google it) girl who really enjoys playing with my kinks.

What is GGG? I tried searching it up and all I got was a shitty website about mobile dress-up games for "girls."

I tried looking at Fetlife for a bit. Most communities in my area appear to be dead, or just have forums where it's a sausagefest looking for a female. (Shiny unicorn.) It's hard to imagine anything decent could be found there, and even then, without a condition of some sort.

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