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(Welp guess who decided to write their own story. Yep. Me. This is definitely not gonna turn out badly. Anyway, here's a little backstory stuff before the actual story begins. So enjoy my half-assed attempt at a story and my google translated mess.) For 69 years, The Union of Soviet Socialist Republics endured. When the Soviet Union was dissolved in 1991, it was broken up into fifteen independent nations: Tajikistan, Turkmenistan, Kyrgyzstan, Uzbekistan, Kazakhstan, Azerbaijan, Armenia, Georgia, Moldova, Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania, Belarus, and the largest of the former republics, Russia. There was, however an unofficial sixteenth republic, a tiny island off the coast of Kaliningrad, in the Baltic sea. It was known as Pisuaria, and it was quite a peculiar little place. It is one of the only, if not the only country in the world, where sexuality is not only celebrated, but urination as well. Their culture of what some people describe as "Omorashi" dates back nearly 700 years. the Bolshevik revolution of 1917, all of the old laws regarding sexuality were overturned, ending the old Tsarist order. However this did not last long, as Josef Stalin would recriminalize homosexuality in 1933. Pisuaria, which kept homosexuality legal in defiance of Stalin's law, was left alone, since they were so small and insignificant, not to mention reclusive. Even after the fall of the Red Titan at the end of the 20th century, the Soviet spirit still lives on in Pisuariya. Led by their Premier Yuri Nariya, the Pisuarian people enjoy a life of lewdness. CHAPTER 1: Alice Alice had only heard rumors about the mysterious island. People who probably have never set foot in Pisuaria make up tales of men and women not using public toilets out of fear of retribution from their ruthless dictator. Others give more of a positive view on it, telling about a dreamland where you can walk around nude in broad daylight, marry whoever you want (or however many people you want), and pee wherever your heart, or bladder, desires. Alice decided that she would find out herself what Pisuarian life really was like. It was a long trip, 10 hours on a plane from New York to Kaliningrad, and an additional hour and a half from the Kaliningrad harbor to the coast of Pisuaria, but she finally made it. However, she regrets accepting the complimentary large soda the Pisuarian ferry gave all of the passengers for some reason. She couldn't fathom why, but she didn't care right now. Right now, her bladder cried out for relief. Signs in Russian and Lithuanian greet the passengers coming off the docks, "Добро пожаловать в Советскую Социалистическую Республику Писуария!" "Sveiki atvykę į Tarybų Socialistinę Respubliką Pisuariya!" "Welcome to the Soviet Socialist Republic of Pisuaria," they all said. Alice steps off the boat and heads to customs, where she will soon be admitted into the land of secrets. A male customs guard, looks to be in his late 20s, stops Alice and asks for her passport. Hopping from one foot to the other, she obliges, desperate to find a bathroom. It takes them a few minutes to check her passport, but she couldn't wait a few more seconds. "Excuse me, sir," she asked, "Do you mind hurrying it up? I really need to use the restroom!" The guard looks at another guard and then chuckles. "Bathroom? Sure. There's one over there, and there, hell, the whole COUNTRY is a bathroom!" The guard seemed amuse by his little joke, Alice however was not. "I'm not joking, I'm about to pee myself. Please, I'm begging you, point me to a restroom!" The guard tells his coworker to stay there and finish checking her passport, and he escorts Alice to the bathroom. Then suddenly the strangest thing happened. Alice noticed that he was following her into the bathroom. "Uh, thank you, I can find my way from here." The guard replies, "I'm sure you can, but to be quite honest, I need to piss too." Alice concedes, hoping to just get it over with. She rushes into a vacant stall and shuts the door behind her. She pulls down her panties, lifts her skirt, and sits down on the toilet before letting out a forceful gush of piss. Alice lets out a moan of relief that could most definitely be heard by the guard, but she didn't care. She was in heaven right now. She peed for what felt like an eternity before she finished. As she wiped herself dry and pulled up her panties, she exited the stall to see a sight that no one would have believed if she told them. The guard was standing in front of the sink, his penis in hand, letting out a golden stream into the sink. Alice asks the man "What are you doing?!" He replies "I'm relieving myself. What does it look like?" "In the SINK???" "Oh, come on, it drains to the same place those toilets do," he says. "You know," he adds, "we Pisuarians are an open minded people, not like the rest of the world." He finishes pissing and zips up, "You'll find our way of life much more...liberating." Alice pondered for a moment, could it really be that the people here don't use public restrooms that often because they don't have the same stigma around public urination as other countries do? She had so many questions, but she decided to ask the most important one at the moment, "I forgot to ask, what is your name?" The man replies "Dimitri, pleased to meet you, eh..." "Alice," she says, "Pleased to meet you too, Dimitri." And that was the moment Alice knew she was in for an interesting trip.