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  1. A couple of Saturdays ago I had an interesting experience that I thought I'd share... I sing lead and play guitar in a rock band. It's super fun and quite liberating, as well, as I tend to be otherwise self-conscious by nature. Of course, rock music pairs well with drunk people, so I've seen/had a few interesting omo-related experiences, particularly after shows. Nothing too over-the-top (yet?), but worth sharing as tidbits at some point. On this particular evening, we happened to play an early show for a function. It was fun, and people were into it, but we were literally packed up and done by 8:00. I knew beforehand this was going to be the case, so had arranged to meet a group of friends for dinner in town after the show. I guess I must have had some stage mojo still going when I reached the restaurant, because when I walked in, an absolutely gorgeous Asian girl at the bar locked eyes with me and gave me a long, seductive stare. Well that made me feel awesome, and, hey, I'm not above a shallow ego boost, as I don't experience this kind of thing too often. The girl looked Southeast Asian of some kind. I would guess she was either tan for a Vietnamese girl or slender for a Filipino girl, or possibly Hmong? Anyway, she was very pretty regardless of ethnicity and she was wearing a form-fitting short blue dress that showed off her curves very nicely. Lovely looking gal, I'd guess she was in her late 20's. My friends already had a table, so I went straight back to meet them, and ended up sitting with my back to the wall, facing the rest of the restaurant. As luck would have it, the sexy girl in the blue dress ended up sitting a few tables away, facing me. Initially, we exchanged glances a few times, which was nice, but eventually I think we kind of forgot about each other as the conversation at our respective tables picked up. The restaurant we were at is a lively spot, and on a Saturday night, most people are enjoying the booze as well as the food. Our group was no different, and after a few drinks, I realized I needed to use the bathroom, quite badly. I have a large bladder and generally I can hold for long periods, but during a show I will often drink literally a gallon or more between water and adult beverages, and sometimes I don't use the restroom at all until after the show. All that liquid has to go somewhere, so I typically end up doing 2 or 3 ridiculously long pees (like literally 2 minutes steady - yes, I've timed them) within a couple of hours following a show, especially if I'm still drinking. Anyway, just as I was waiting for a good time to ask my friend next to me to get up so I could slide out, sexy blue dress gal gets up and heads toward the bathrooms. I know this place has 2 unisex bathrooms, and on a busy Saturday night, it would not be unusual for there to be a bit of a line for them. This made me feel a bit awkward going to the bathroom at this point, just in case I ended up in a queue behind sexy blue dress gal. While I enjoyed the glance exchanges, it just felt weird to get up immediately after her and follow her toward the bathrooms. So I decided to stay put for a while and re-enter the table conversation. I did happen to notice, however, that the girl in the blue dress seemed pretty tipsy. Her gait was a bit unsteady and I noticed her place a hand against the wall as she reached the hallway leading to the bathrooms. Once I got back into the table talk, I kind of lost track of time, but I feel like it was a good 10-15 minutes before my bladder reminded me that it was overdue for one of my 2-minute pees, so I excused myself and headed to the bathrooms. As it happened, when I reached the hallway to the bathrooms, the girl in the blue dress was just exiting the nearer of the two bathrooms. This surprised me, as I would've figured she'd have been back to her table by then. I tried to get a nice glance exchange as we walked by each other, but rather than look over at me, she purposely looked straight down at the ground and avoided eye contact with me. I was kind of disappointed and thought that seemed odd, but shrugged it off and was just happy that there was an open bathroom, as my bladder was starting to feel like it was about to split at the seams. When I entered the bathroom, and headed for the toilet, I couldn't believe my eyes. There was a large puddle of liquid sitting right in front of the toilet. It was at least a foot in diameter and was pooled up pretty high. As I straddled the puddle to relieve my aching bladder, I took a closer look. The puddle was several inches from the toilet base, so it couldn't have been the result of a toilet leak. I looked again at the toilet, the sink, the plumbing - no way it could have been from any of those. Between the size and the location of the puddle, and reflecting on the actions of sexy blue dress girl, it seemed to me that the puddle had to be her pee on the floor. But how? Why? The puddle seemed a bit too close to the toilet to be the result of an attempted squat that missed the bowl, though I suppose this was a possibility. Also the puddle seemed too big to be the result of a partial miss. It also didn't seem like an intentional miss as there wasn't a whole lot of splatter for the size of the puddle. Personally, I would love to think that this was a Jade-style almost-made-it occurrence, where she waited desperately for a bathroom to open up, only to pee herself right in front of the toilet as she tried to hike up her dress and get her Spanx down. If this was the case, she clearly doesn't know that proper almost-made-it protocol is to diligently sop up your pee puddle using an entire roll's worth of toilet paper. The only other possibility I could think of was that she was getting sick into the toilet and then proceeded to pee herself as she was throwing up, as can happen. What do you all think happened here? I would love to know what really happened, though sometimes it's fun to think about the various scenarios that led up to actual evidence.
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