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  1. A/N: Written for omorashi day of Kinktober! Benimaru has to piss. Truth be told, he’s not even sure how long he has had to at this point, only aware of the fact that it’s getting way past the point of simply being irritating, and starting to move into the territory of being urgent. He hates that he often finds himself in situations like this, and does everything he can to avoid them, whenever that is possible. Unfortunately, it’s often not possible to avoid completely, and he often finds himself hurrying to the bathroom at what feels like the last possible second, bladder aching from how long he has been forced to hold on. He has never actually been pushed to his limits, though, and he’d like to think that’s because he’s got a hell of a lot of endurance. It wouldn’t do for someone with his reputation for strength to have such a weak bladder, after all, and he knows that training that sort of thing just comes with the territory of training in general. In that way, it is rather discouraging that he still finds himself struggling with desperation on busy days, but he can’t help it when he has a million and one things to do, and no one will leave him the hell alone long enough to take a break. Which, of course, he could always just tell them that he’s going to take a piss, be right back. That would be easy enough, and the majority of the people he spends his time with make their excuses just like that all the time. It really makes no sense for him to be so damn shy about it, but he is. That is how he has found himself in this position once again, after a hectic day of dealing with putting another old friend to rest, and the aftermath of that festival, where he can’t seem to catch a break no matter what he does. The fight went on way longer than it should have, possibly because he already had to piss before it even started, and that threw him off, but he knows that’s no excuse to get sloppy. Now, he’s been helping fix things up, always with someone working at his side, chatting away, and he can never bring himself to try and take his leave. He’s getting really frustrated, barely able to hold still, and even when he is able to leave one project for another, there are always those stopping him on the way, making it hard for him to slip off. Everyone wants to talk to him, giving him things and thanking him and inviting him places. That’s how it is every day of his life and he’s more than used to it, even if he doesn’t get why they all adore him so much. It just becomes a huge pain in the ass when he needs to pee, and perhaps that is part of the reason he does not want to let onto that little weakness, even if it’s one that everyone has. He doesn’t think he deserves his position or all of this respect, and he feels like he would be making a fool of himself by showing that he, just like everyone else, has that sort of need. As irrational as it is, he still can’t shake that thought, and can’t rid himself of that anxiety. All day long, he’s run ragged, the throbbing in his bladder putting him in a worse and worse mood. No one ever seems to notice when he’s more short with them than normal, never put off by any irritation because that’s just how he is. But all the while, he is struggling with the tortuous throbbing of his bladder, never able to stand still for long, yet struggling with each step, worried that he’s going to leak. Again. The fact that he’s leaked at all is humiliating enough, and now, he’s starting to worry that he really might get pushed past his limits. No matter what, he can’t let that happen; that would surely be enough to ruin him, far worse than simply taking a break, not stopping when someone calls out to him. He knows that, and still he can’t bring himself to just do it. His hands tremble at his sides, and Benimaru, for all his strength and supposed charisma, has no idea what he’s supposed to do. “Just the man I was looking for!” He wants to groan when he hears that, but stifles it when he sees that it’s Konro. If anyone would be able to pick up on a subtle shift like that, it’s the man who had a hand in bringing him up. And, if there’s anyone Benimaru wants to look strong in front of, it’s Konro, and not just because he wants to make his former teacher proud. No, it goes a lot deeper than that, and he really hates to think about that, not sure what he’s supposed to do with those feelings. To make a long story short, he wants to avoid Konro now more than anyone else, and forces himself to keep his composure. “What do you need?” he asks, glad that he can at least keep the strain out of his voice. “Nothing much, just come with me really quick,” Konro replies, throwing an arm around him to start to guide him away. He’s being uncharacteristically boisterous, but Benimaru doesn’t have much of a chance to question that. The slight jostling as Konro moves him along makes him spring another leak, and he winces, praying that Konro doesn’t notice. “Where, exactly, are you taking me?” Konro lowers his voice, only audible to Benimaru, as he says, “Somewhere where you can get a little privacy. Honestly, Waka, you’ve got to stop pushing yourself like that.” He can feel his face turning red, the heat of his humiliation hitting him all at once. Konro can tell? He’s been able to tell before? He knows how bad Benimaru is struggling right now, and knows that it’s a struggle more often than he would ever want to admit? “I don’t know what you’re talking about…” he mumbles, not even able to make his lie sound convincing. “Just shut up and stop being so damn stubborn. If there’s one thing I wish you hadn’t picked up from him…” Konro mumbles, shaking his head. “I know you’ve got this image you feel like you need to protect, but I don’t think anyone’s going to have that shattered if they find out their destroyer goes to the bathroom like everyone else.” “Would you keep your voice down?!” he snaps, before biting his lip. Things just keep getting more and more embarrassing for him, and the bathroom still seems so far away. How could he have let this happen? “You think this rowdy bunch can hear me over their own mouths? Don’t worry,” he reassures him. Dropping his voice once again, he adds, “You’re gonna be okay. I didn’t mean to sound so harsh, just…I worry about you. I wasn’t saying anything before because I didn’t want to embarrass you, but today it didn’t seem like it was going to end, and I know you’d rather be embarrassed with me than anyone else.” Benimaru isn’t sure if that’s true or not. All he can bring himself to say is, “Thanks.” “Don’t mention it. Come on, we’re almost there.” They’re almost there, alright, but he isn’t sure if he can take much more of this. He keeps briefly losing control, barely able to regain it, and soon, he’s going to start showing evidence of that. Fortunately, they’re moving inside the guardhouse now, completely empty since everyone is taking part in the construction efforts outside. Unfortunately, Konro has not let go of him, still leading him along, increasing his humiliation more by the second. “I’m sorry, I just…I just…” He can’t help it anymore, he has to let a hand drop down between his legs. Though he would like to say he can’t remember the last time he was pushed to this point, that he must have been a very small child, he knows that he often finds himself resorting to this when the bathroom door shuts behind him, just to take the last few steps towards relief without losing out at the last second. The fact that he’s already doing this and is not even in the bathroom yet is no more lost on him than the fact that Konro is watching him. “It’s alright, you’re almost there.” To make matters worse, he’s speaking to him like a little kid, urging him on with a gentle, comforting voice. Benimaru would seriously rather be anywhere but here, preferably just dead so that he could forever escape this humiliation. He isn’t sure how he will live this down, how he will make Konro forget it, but as long as he can make it- He doesn’t. All at once, he has to stop, even though he urges himself to keep going. All at once, he can feel that last bit of control slip, and then it’s all over for him. No matter what he does, he can’t stop the sudden surge of hot piss, feeling like it explodes out of him, the force is so great. After so many slight spurts, it is clear that those were nothing compared to this, and before he can take another step forward, he has lost control completely, slumping forward, frozen in disbelief as he fully pisses himself, with Konro’s arm still over his shoulders. “Beni?” By the time Konro processes what is happening, a puddle is already growing at their feet. Benimaru’s shoulders begin to shake, because of course he has to add insult to injury, of course he has to make himself look even more like a helpless child. “Hey, are you crying?” “What the hell do you think?!” he snaps, his voice breaking. Only now does his stream finally slow to a stop, the damage already done, the evidence in the massive stain on his pants and the puddle on the floor. “Just…just leave me alone, let me handle this! I’m not some helpless kid, so I can…I can handle it alone…” “Whoa there, who said anything about you being a helpless kid?” Konro takes on a stern tone, moving so that Benimaru is directly in front of him, forcing him to look up at him. “This didn’t happen because you’re some helpless kid, Waka. Far from it. I think you might be a stubborn idiot, and I might be a little mad you’d push yourself this far over trying to look tough for everyone, but more than that, I’m just worried about you. That’s why I wanted to help you and try and prevent this, and, no, I’m not going to leave you alone when you clearly don’t need that.” “But I…but I…” He’s never been good at figuring out what to say to one of Konro’s lectures. All he can do is hang his head, and when he does, Konro claps a hand on his shoulder. “You’re still tougher than anyone I know. This doesn’t change that. And, hey, at least it’s just the two of us in here, right? You know your secrets are always safe with me,” he says. Though it isn’t much comfort to Benimaru, he has to admit that it is better to share this secret with Konro, if it has to be someone. Still, if he could choose, he would choose to have no one know about this. He would choose to take this to his grave. “It’s…it’s never happened before, and I’m going to make sure it never happens again,” is all he can bring himself to say, painfully aware of how stupid it sounds after it’s already out. “So you don’t have to worry about me.” “I’m always gonna worry about something, but alright, I’ll hold you to that. But just know, even if you can’t bring yourself to take those breaks in front of the others, you don’t ever have to hide it from me, and if you need help with an excuse, just give me a look. I’ll help you out,” Konro promises. Though he hopes it never comes to that again, Benimaru feels a bit better knowing that he can count on Konro for that. He still feels humiliated, and knows he might not ever be able to fully recover from this blow to his ego, but Konro’s comfort has done a lot to help him. That being said, that does make things worse in a way, because it only further strengthens his feelings, even though he’s sure this has set him back in terms of making any real progress there. “You go get changed and I’ll get this cleaned up before anyone comes in here,” Konro says, and Benimaru nods, turning to head off. Just before he leaves, though, the older man chuckles and speaks up again. “But I wouldn’t say it’s never happened before. I remember this one time when you were a kid-” “Shut the hell up, old man!” - If you're interested in my writing updates, please join my discord server! https://discord.gg/xUrPXDH I stream here, and the chat is locked when there isn't a stream going on, so for the most part, it's only posts that are updates from me
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