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DesperateJill

✨ Legendary Member
  • Posts

    3,474
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  • Days Won

    3

Reputation Activity

  1. crying
    DesperateJill got a reaction from rebeljaffa for a status update, Oy I was sick again, this has not been a good summer for Jill at all. I probably shou   
    Oy I was sick again, this has not been a good summer for Jill at all. I probably should have had some indication that other day when I had to go to the bathroom at that park as I normally don't have to take a shit when I am away from home, so I guess something must have been brewing in my stomach.

    I just wanted to send this quick message to know that it might be a few days before I get back to all of the messages here because I see I have like 28 notifications and I just don't have time to get around to that today, so hopefully I will be back soon, but it might be a while.
  2. Upvote
    DesperateJill got a reaction from aumonier95 for a status update, My number of posts and my reputation points are both the same number right now at 316   
    My number of posts and my reputation points are both the same number right now at 3168 which means that roughly averages out so that every one of my posts gets at least one like, not bad!
  3. Upvote
    DesperateJill got a reaction from rebeljaffa for a status update, My number of posts and my reputation points are both the same number right now at 316   
    My number of posts and my reputation points are both the same number right now at 3168 which means that roughly averages out so that every one of my posts gets at least one like, not bad!
  4. Upvote
    DesperateJill got a reaction from Gatto-Italiano for a status update, My number of posts and my reputation points are both the same number right now at 316   
    My number of posts and my reputation points are both the same number right now at 3168 which means that roughly averages out so that every one of my posts gets at least one like, not bad!
  5. Upvote
    DesperateJill got a reaction from aumonier95 for a status update, Oy yet another day lost to illness, gonna try to catch up here today. This has been a   
    Oy yet another day lost to illness, gonna try to catch up here today. This has been a bad summer.
  6. crying
    DesperateJill got a reaction from rebeljaffa for a status update, I hate how half the time I get sick I relapse and am back in the hospital in a day or   
    I hate how half the time I get sick I relapse and am back in the hospital in a day or two. This has not been a good month for me. Will hopefully catch up here soon.
  7. love
    DesperateJill got a reaction from Mary127 for a status update, I hate how half the time I get sick I relapse and am back in the hospital in a day or   
    I hate how half the time I get sick I relapse and am back in the hospital in a day or two. This has not been a good month for me. Will hopefully catch up here soon.
  8. Upvote
    DesperateJill got a reaction from aumonier95 for a status update, I hate how half the time I get sick I relapse and am back in the hospital in a day or   
    I hate how half the time I get sick I relapse and am back in the hospital in a day or two. This has not been a good month for me. Will hopefully catch up here soon.
  9. crying
    DesperateJill got a reaction from rebeljaffa for a status update, Damn I was in the hospital again after just recovering from being sick like a week or   
    Damn I was in the hospital again after just recovering from being sick like a week or two ago, it was only for six hours this time, so that was relatively short, but I have to say the universe really does seem to resent me for using it as my own personal bathroom!
  10. cheer
    DesperateJill reacted to AlphaBladder for a status update, My wife has given me full control over her bladder. I’ll try not to go overboard so t   
    My wife has given me full control over her bladder. I’ll try not to go overboard so that she doesn’t end up hurting herself, but man oh man am I excited.
  11. laugh
    DesperateJill reacted to rebeljaffa for a status update, I have been accused sometimes of acting like the world revolves around me, but I know   
    I have been accused sometimes of acting like the world revolves around me, but I know it doesn't. It revolves around the sun, which shines out of my backside! 
  12. laugh
    DesperateJill got a reaction from trekkie for a status update, Q: If a talking cat was able to give testimony in court but they lied what would they   
    Q: If a talking cat was able to give testimony in court but they lied what would they be guilty of? A: Purrjury!
  13. laugh
    DesperateJill got a reaction from Mary127 for a status update, Q: If a talking cat was able to give testimony in court but they lied what would they   
    Q: If a talking cat was able to give testimony in court but they lied what would they be guilty of? A: Purrjury!
  14. laugh
    DesperateJill got a reaction from rebeljaffa for a status update, Q: If a talking cat was able to give testimony in court but they lied what would they   
    Q: If a talking cat was able to give testimony in court but they lied what would they be guilty of? A: Purrjury!
  15. laugh
    DesperateJill got a reaction from sleeping_cat01 for a status update, Q: If a talking cat was able to give testimony in court but they lied what would they   
    Q: If a talking cat was able to give testimony in court but they lied what would they be guilty of? A: Purrjury!
  16. Upvote
    DesperateJill got a reaction from aumonier95 for a status update, Q: If a talking cat was able to give testimony in court but they lied what would they   
    Q: If a talking cat was able to give testimony in court but they lied what would they be guilty of? A: Purrjury!
  17. laugh
    DesperateJill reacted to rebeljaffa for a status update, In Britain we call it a lift, but Americans call it an elevator. I guess we're just r   
    In Britain we call it a lift, but Americans call it an elevator.
    I guess we're just raised differently.
  18. Upvote
    DesperateJill reacted to trekkie for a status update, Perfect latchkey accident moment. My need went from next to nothing to intense in the   
    Perfect latchkey accident moment. My need went from next to nothing to intense in the time it took me to get to the door and unlock it. I had no chance and was peeing down my legs all the way down the hall!
  19. wow
    DesperateJill reacted to rebeljaffa for a status update, In the pub last night I was drinking - a lot - and trying to keep up the conversation   
    In the pub last night I was drinking - a lot - and trying to keep up the conversation (and not 'break the seal').... I suddenly realised time was up and quickly excused myself, however I could feel it starting to trickle as I walked through the bar to the toilets... Spent the rest of the evening conscious of damp denim.  I walked back to a friend's house afterwards and on the way I thought I was going to pee myself again but I made it there.  I had to excuse myself straight away but while I was fiddling with the bathroom door and my button jeans, it happened again. Said my goodbyes and the 15 minute walk home was chafing...  I've got to go back this morning to pick up my car, hope I didn't pee on their floor or anything and that nobody realised I started to burst 🤷‍♂️
  20. Upvote
    DesperateJill reacted to Mary127 for a status update, I drank so much water…   
    I drank so much water…
  21. laugh
    DesperateJill reacted to rebeljaffa for a status update, Why do you spell dark with a c, not a k ? Because you can't c in the dark!   
    Why do you spell dark with a c, not a k?
    Because you can't c in the dark!

  22. wow
    DesperateJill got a reaction from rebeljaffa for a status update, Here's a thought to consider the next time you go to the bathroom, consider the possi   
    Here's a thought to consider the next time you go to the bathroom, consider the possibility that ghosts are real. Once you consider this possibility that means you have to consider the possibility that any given moment that there are ghosts watching you in the bathroom, it could be anyone, Hitler, Anne Frank, Benito Mussolini, Martin Luther King, your grandmother, who knows who is watching you pee from the world beyond!
  23. laugh
    DesperateJill reacted to rebeljaffa for a status update, Toilet jokes aren't my favourite kind of humour But they're a solid number 2...   
    Toilet jokes aren't my favourite kind of humour
    But they're a solid number 2...
  24. laugh
    DesperateJill reacted to rebeljaffa for a status update, Just to let you know, Gary Numan is 13 days older than Gary Oldman.   
    Just to let you know, Gary Numan is 13 days older than Gary Oldman.
  25. laugh
    DesperateJill reacted to rebeljaffa for a status update, I thought I would share a bathroom joke with you all... Why were there balloons in th   
    I thought I would share a bathroom joke with you all...
    Why were there balloons in the bathroom? There was a birthday potty! 
    You're welcome!
     
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