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DesperateJill

✨ Legendary Member
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DesperateJill last won the day on July 7 2023

DesperateJill had the most liked content!

Personal Information

  • My pronouns are..
    she/her

My Kinks

  • I'm into..
    Bathroom Control
    Tickling
    Watersports
    Bondage
    Cuddling
    Exhibitionism
    Gender bender
    Humiliation
    Master / Slave
    Pleasure control
    Public humiliation
    Sadism / Masochism

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DesperateJill's Achievements

  1. I can definitely say that tickling is one of my other major fetishes, and it does go good with desperation, although I don't really have any real-world experience, just like with most of my other fetishes unfortunately.
  2. @mews39 "Yeah, I saw one of my favorite fanfiction authors who often writes dark stuff point that out, basically saying what I said above, that if someone's stories are really dark, you know it was written by a real person. It's interesting with omorashi in particular, I saw a post with people talking about how to get around the restrictions. The AI will refuse to write about someone wetting themselves since it's humiliating, so to get it to write the story it had to be framed as the characters intentionally doing it, which really limits what kind of stories you can get out of AI. It also seemed like you had to jump through a lot of hoops to get past the AI's restrictions and had me wondering, why not just put in the effort to write it yourself at that point?" I remember it was this time last year I actually first tried using some of those AI story writers and I have to admit I was not very impressed with them at all. I think it will probably be a while before AI can write as convincingly as people especially if it has heavy censorship like that because I certainly do not censor myself very much when I write my stuff. Like the one I did is I tried putting in a story about an Asian woman who is desperate but then her cat runs away and she can't go to the bathroom as she's chasing after the cat and the story that the AI writer basically said she goes to the bathroom and then goes after the cat, and I am like if she goes to the bathroom first it's not really an omorashi story at all. I was getting prematurely excited for a while that I could take my thousands of story ideas that I would never have time to write all of them and just put them into an AI story writer and have them write the stories for me but no such luck. Maybe AI will get to the point where I could say put my entire life's work into an AI and it would somehow be able to write the way I would by analyzing my writing, but we are not at that stage yet as far as I can tell, but who knows what will be possible in a couple of years. @inlovewithpee "Fanfiction is way too overrated" I have never really been into fanfiction much either as it seems like it's a little bit unoriginal because you are basically working with somebody else's stories. I know that there are a lot of people who like it but I always prefer my own original stuff to working with somebody else's characters, and since I usually intend to publish everything that I write it also brings up copyright issues I suppose.
  3. @RDFan2020 "Sometimes stories written by humans also have a character make it at the very end, but a human writer will usually change things around a little from time to time. This often happens with AI generated stories because virtually every AI program that I have heard of is designed to output useful and 100 percent family-friendly content only." I remember this time last year I discovered one of those AI story writers and I have to admit that that was why give up on it pretty much right away, AI stories always end up trying to go towards a reasonable and morally upstanding ending, which is totally the opposite of pretty much everything I write! So I'm not worried right now about AI taking away jobs from the people who write the kind of things that I write to say the least.
  4. I found myself in that situation pretty regularly and unfortunately there's really nothing else you can do other than just continue holding it.
  5. @Tree Trimmer "Wow! You must have had a few close calls! Did you usually pee before leaving work each day or did you hold it until you got home?" I have always been big on precautionary peeing as I use the bathroom before the house and whenever I arrived at a new place pretty much. But at work yes I pretty much held until the end of the day.
  6. @Angusburger "And no women ever asked the boss where the restrooms are and you all just quietly waited?" A lot of the time there were bathrooms but a lot of the time they didn't open them until later in the day so it was rather frustrating.
  7. I'm sorry I haven't really been participating  very regularly here lately but the last couple of months between lots of personal tragedy and lots of stress and being sick again now, I feel like it has at least partially killed the fetish for me, not completely. but it's been about six months now since I have last been on any kind of major fetish binge, so I feel that as I get older I am moving gradually towards asexuality.

    1. rebeljaffa

      I'm always glad to see you here Jill. 

  8. @Tree Trimmer "How did you ever manage to get through the rest of the day....every day???" I try not to drink very much and drink only water because anything other than water tends to make me have to go to the bathroom rapidly.
  9. @Angusburger "Would you have felt better if men also held in their pee? I still don’t get or can imagine how one can be patient enough to hold it in for hours while men get to go. Was it ever to the point of desperation or was it usually just those mild I need to go sebsation?" I can say by midday I was pretty much always desperate yes.
  10. I have yet to experience a situation in which there was a men's line where there wasn't also a huge line for the women's room. Generally speaking unless it's an extremely male-dominated event if there is any line at all for the men the women's room line will probably be correspondingly enormous.
  11. I guess I would have to say unambiguously every day at work when the men were peeing outside while I was holding it all day.
  12. @DrBorderline I think these are all good points as I relate to a lot of this. "1. Make sure there's not a larger problem overshadowing everything else. Depression and Anxiety can make it effectively impossible to think creatively or logically, and there's more than enough stuff going on in the world right now to cause either." I find that I've been pretty anxious and depressed pretty much my whole life but I find it doesn't really eat into my productivity that badly fortunately, because then I channel it into my writing. I guess that's mostly not very happy people who write a lot of post-apocalyptic dystopia anyway, but I find that I channel anything negative into my writing, and am often inspired by lots of things in the news that make me angry, not so much in regards to my omorashi stuff though, that stuff that gets written when my mind is completely overwhelmed with nothing but my fetish, which has been happening less and less over time, but when I have it bad I sometimes can't focus on anything else. "2. Cycle projects. Just as others have mentioned, when one project becomes a struggle to work on, working on something else gives a new perspective and breaks up monotony. I usually have four active projects I'm shifting from on a daily basis (original fiction, non fiction, erotica, and most recently interactive fiction) so if I get stuck on one I can shift focus to the next." I find that my mood shifts a lot from day to day and I will often work on like a larger project and then write shorter stories about stuff that is a different topic from a larger project that I'm writing on. Basically her from riding on a larger project about omorashi or something if I don't feel in the mood for that I will write something on omorashi related, or vice versa, if I am working on a serious sci-fi novel but then I have a fetish mood you gotta go where the mood takes you because otherwise you are fighting an uphill battle I have found. Very often I will plan on writing something like a longer work but then something will happen in the news and I will think of a great satire story that I want to do right away.So yeah you can have multiple things going on at once and I find that the best balance is to do a little bit of a longer project and then do a little bit of short stories each day so that you don't spend too much time when any one thing at any one time so you don't get overwhelmed with it, although if you're really doing good sometimes it's better to just keep going and going with it while the momentum is there. Right now I have about four incomplete novels that I really should get back to, one involving alien invasion, one about people with superpowers, one that's an alternate history and another one that is erotica, about my other fetish for embarrassing nudity. A couple of these I had started a couple of years ago and I really have to get back to finishing them because I hate leaving things incomplete, but again I would have to read it all again to get up to speed on where I left off and that sometimes proves onerous so it ends up not getting done even though I always intend to finish them at some point. "3. Establish a "Cutting Room Floor" file or folder. I know a guy on a survivalist forum who swears by this, and got the name from him as well; the way he explained it, film production crews shoot a lot of different scenes from different angles, and not all of it ends up in the full release. However, with the rise of the DVD, studios realized that customers were willing to pay for both the completed film and the leftover bits of Deleted Scenes that didn't work out. This same mentality is very useful when fighting writer's block because sometimes the idea or expectation of spending time working on something only to delete it when it doesn't look or sound right pulls the rug out from under any motivation an author might have. Simply save the stuff you write that you don't necessarily like in another place. Could be the end of the document, could be a dedicated document with nothing but snippets of dialogue or narration, could be each deleted scenes has its own document. You can organize it in whatever way is most convenient and intuitive for you." I have to admit I'm not really big on reading and editing, if I didn't get it right the first time I very rarely change stuff. I basically do three edits of everything, when I write a short story I read and edited immediately when I am done, then I put it in the appropriate collections based on topic and then I won't read and edit again until I read and edit the full collection and then do the final reading and editing using the editing software on my other computer before I publish it. But I find I get the most done when I am working on a larger project because then I keep writing continuously and I don't have to read and edit those chapters until the next day. But I really do hate getting rid of anything because it feels like a waste, so I do have at least a couple of things where I have like alternate endings or outtakes, and there are a couple of times I have been writing something serious and thinking I could do a comedic parody of my own work at later point or vice versa because sometimes I start writing something that is sort of serious and that I think of all these ways it could be funny but that don't fit into the story, and I think that that's something pretty cool as I have never heard of a writer doing a parody of their own book. It's almost like even though there are movies where they have like a special edition you never hear of them making like a special edition of books or doing a rewrite of a book that you felt wasn't good the first time around. And I always like to include author notes with everything that I write so that people would know what inspired it as well as other ways I was planning to go with it, like I will explain this was the original idea but then when I wrote it I ended up trying to do this instead… "4. Stimulants. I use coffee and sometimes energy drinks, but there are plenty of other options, assuming you don't have a medical reason to stay away from them." I don't really use stimulants in order to get me going, the only thing that really slows me down or getting distracted by the Internet or being sick, which unfortunately happens pretty often, but I have never really resorted to stimulants in order to keep going. "5. Sleep Deprivation. When I'm really, really stuck on something, and my schedule permits it, I'll stay up much later and just free associate while my brain is running on auxiliary power. The end results are often very surreal, with nuggets of useful ideas here and there that I can pick through once I'm away. (Did this in college a few times, and in one case wrote up a 3000 word story where a man gets in an argument with his own foot. The instructor didn't even bother to grade it, just wrote a huge question mark in red ink over the front page of the printout. Honestly? Reasonable under the circumstances.)" I find myself doing this more and more. Generally I will end up spending most of the afternoon doing my writing and then after I eat dinner it's basically writing time is over, but now I find that sometimes instead of eating my dinner and then just watching and reading stuff if I'm really working on something or if I had a unproductive day I will extend my writing time to get more done. But I'll probably going to end up doing that today because so far I haven't really done much productively so I should probably get out of here and get back to work on my writing…
  13. @LoveWetUndies "Second being, try writing something else. It doesn’t have to be a story you post or even something perfectly written. For me it can be anything and sometimes just being creative on another project helps me feel motivated to go back to the first project or even help with creative blocks." I can second this one. As a person with over 63,000 story ideas most of which will never be written due to lack of time I can say that I have been blessed over the fact that I have never really suffered from writers block, but it does sometimes feel like if I'm working on a larger project sometimes I'll get bored with the topic and go back to it later. I have about four novels that I haven't gotten around to finish, not due to lack of ideas, but just because I guess I lost interest for a while but I always intend to finish them someday. Most of the time though I tried to finish what I start before I move on to a new larger project. But I find that I like to get a good balance where I will work on a larger project and then short stories between that, so if I happen to be in the mood for say a story about Mars or aliens when I'm in the middle of writing something longer that has nothing to do with those topics, I can take a break for a day right one of those stories and then get back to the novel the next day. Sort of like how I only write fetish material when I am in a fetish mood and can't concentrate on anything else. The key is to just not abandon the project altogether, try to force yourself to try and finish it but if you need a break and need to go back to it later on there's nothing wrong with that as then maybe you can tackle it with fresh ideas. Sometimes I will write a story, especially a news of the day satire story, and I will be glad that I waited a day or two to write it because the new stuff happens that inspires new stuff within the story, so sometimes there is value in waiting to finish something at another time. I think the thing that I don't like though is if I would start writing a larger project and then I lose momentum and that I don't go back to it for a while, and then I have to pretty much read the whole thing to remind myself where I was up to before I start resuming work on it, which sometimes discourages me, so most of the time I like to start something and finish it and just keep working on it until I finish it. I don't like the idea of starting something and not finishing it because then it's wasted time if you don't end up finishing it. I think another thing that I do is that I am sort of like a person who plans out the basic idea of where I'm going to go with the story but then in mostly spontaneous when I am writing it. So basically if I'm sitting down to start something I pretty much know where I'm going to go with it, it may take different twists and turns as I start writing it, but if I have actually sat down to started I generally know or have a general idea where I want to go with it. So maybe sometimes it's better to know where you want to go with a story before you start it. As long as I know generally where I am working towards I usually don't have problems coming up with material spontaneously, once I actually sit down to write the thing it pretty much just comes to me, but I realize that not everybody can find it that effortless. There's always a perennial debate are you a plotter or a planner, some people will just work on something spontaneously and let it develop with time, others will plan it out in detail, I find that a middle ground tends to work the best, no basically where you want to go with it and what you are working towards but then leave plenty of room open to be spontaneous while you write it. The problem with planning is that sometimes you had so much material that you want to add to the story that then you never start on writing it. The best story for me to write is one where I know I basically have the idea for it and the plot for it but I can otherwise be spontaneous, if there's a bunch of dialogue that I have written for it a lot of different scenes I have to sort of plan it in chronological order, and that I have to remember not to forget to put things in there, and it really does slow things down.
  14. For me virtually impossible, if I have to go even the slightest little bit it will keep me awake, and even once I do get to sleep I usually tend to wake up numerous times to go to the bathroom, as I am not a very heavy sleeper.
  15. @JustMike "You're going to https://www.udio.com/? What does the virus software say is wrong with it? Udio is very new -- it was launched publicly just last week. Maybe your virus software just doesn't know about it yet, I don't know. The Wikipedia page is here if want to read some background about the company: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Udio" My software came up saying that it was suspicious or unknown I think, and then it asked if I should give it permission, but I got paranoid and immediately decided to leave the page. I just got a new computer like two months ago that is so much faster than my old one and I am paranoid about the possibility of getting it bogged down with spyware or something. Whenever something like that happens it just makes me really paranoid. I think you might be right though if it's only one week old and the virus software probably hasn't been aware of it. So maybe I was panicking prematurely.
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