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KrisAbyss

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Everything posted by KrisAbyss

  1. Whatever you post, I'm sure somebody will like it 🙂 I like seeing genuine experiences, intentional or unintentional desperation and wetting.
  2. I have, but I was 16 at the time. We did stay together for a while, and never spoke of it again. But things didn't end up working out. My current partner of almost 9 years is super supportive and is willing to indulge me, even if he's not into it himself. Our sex life is complicated right now but I'm glad I can trust him with all my secrets, even the embarrassing ones.
  3. I'm glad you made it to the hotel without any major accidents! That's an insane amount of water, it's no surprise you had to pee so much. Excited to see the pics when you post them 🙂
  4. OP, I have the exact same experience as you. It is annoying that I can't lose control fully, but at least it prevents me from making big messes.
  5. I generally ring in the new year with family and friends, so no. Seems like it could be fun if I'm ever alone on new years, but I hope I never have to be alone, you know?
  6. Hot story! 🙂 I'm a transmasc enby as well and I got my first STP today! It's a cheap Amazon one, I'm going to get a nice STP packer in a couple months. I got really desperate today to try to make it easier to pee standing up but my body outright refused to pee in the stp unless I pushed. How did you get used to using it? Does being really desperate help for you?
  7. I also watch only men, but I'm a weird situation because I'm transmasculine. I like to imagine myself in the body of the man experiencing extreme desperation. Watching women makes me dysphoric, even though I'm bi. I for one would love to see more male content!
  8. Having done neither, I can only imagine it feels just as good as sticking a finger in your penis. That is to say, not very. Unless you're into that sort of thing, I guess. I think most people would probably find it painful and unpleasant.
  9. Today I've been taking a sip of water every time I hit a loading screen, specifically the one with the stats and loading screen tips. That means I'm drinking for every death, every fast travel, every time I enter or exit a shrine... I fast travel a lot so I ended up drinking a lot of water lol
  10. I can't speak for that person in particular but in general, stimming and catatonia are completely different things. Stimming is soothing self-stimulation. Rocking in a chair, clicking pens, stuff like that. I don't have any experience with catatonia but the little research I've done suggests that it's very rare and involves extreme episodes of either hyperactivity or shutdown, both of which sound horribly unpleasant. I know this isn't super relevant to the rest of your post, but there's a lot of misinformation on the internet about neurodiversity so I like to take the chance to educate when I can.
  11. Yep, it's called RunPee. I've had it installed for years but I've only used it a few times. It seems pretty useful but you have to look at it before the movie and try to remember the "peetimes" cause obviously you can't be checking your phone during the movie.
  12. That was hot, hope you had fun 🙂 I couldn't see the measurements on the cup, how much did it end up being?
  13. My husband has been dabbling in erotica recently. I asked him to write me a story, and although he does not share my fetish, he agreed. With his permission, I'm sharing it with all of you. Enjoy 🙂 ----- Jennifer Bale was a mousy, timid woman who could not, however hard she tried, pee in public. She knew she was far from the only one with that problem, but every time she tried it was like running face-first into a brick wall and bouncing off. She’d sit there, bladder full with the constant sensation of starting up the stream, and then nothing would come out. It was an embarrassing agony Jennifer avoided mostly through working from home and timing all of her excursions around her bladder. It was something she’d never admit to anyone else, but the aversion was so strong in her that even talking about it made her throat close up and her thoughts turn fuzzy with shame. This was exactly the kind of thing she knew people would laugh at her about, and so she kept it silent. It wasn’t a comfortable life, but it was one Jennifer was used to. Until the day came when she got a new job. “All that remains is a background check and a drug test,” the interviewer had cheerfully told her over zoom. “You’re not hiding a closet full of dead bodies are you?” she asked, laughing. “N-no, no dead bodies or anything,” Jennifer replied, forcing a smile on her face. She pushed her glasses back up her nose and said, “I’m not a drug user or anything, but is the drug test really necessary? Wasn’t it mostly to catch people smoking pot back in the day?” The interviewer sighed and shrugged. “You’re not wrong, but try telling the higher ups that. If it was up to me you wouldn’t have to, but it’s not. Is that going to be a problem?” Jennifer shook her head vehemently. “No no, not at all. I’ve got nothing to hide.” That wasn’t entirely true. She had herself to hide, and the idea of peeing into a cup in a public restroom was…God, if Jennifer didn’t need this job, she…Probably still would’ve given in and done it. She wasn’t the type to make a fuss or make noise if things weren’t going her way. This was no different. So the next day, Jennifer found herself going down to the local clinic, horrified to find it almost entirely full. She shifted her purse, heavy with a big refillable water bottle, and tried to get the receptionist’s attention. “What? Can’t you see I’m busy?” the receptionist barked. She had the phone cradled against her shoulder while she typed on the computer. All around them, the clinic buzzed with a never ending stream of noise. Families sat close together talking, the TV blared out yuppies pretending to buy homes on HGTV, and a couple kids ran around screaming with their hands thrown in the air. Jennifer leaned in closer, wetting her lips and says, “I was told to come here for a drug test and I --” “Name?” “J-jennifer Bale,” she replied, eyes darting around. The receptionist hung up and typed a bit more on her computer. A small printer spat out a label she stuck on a small plastic cup. “The restroom’s that way. There’s a panel on the wall you can twist to open. Put your sample in there when you’re done.” Jennifer took the cup and murmured a thank you, but the receptionist was already looking past her and yelled out, “Next!” Jennifer quickly got out of the way and found a seat with a good view of the TV. She took a long, deep breath to steady herself. Step one was over and done with. Now for the hard part. She took the water bottle out of her purse and took a long, thirsty drink. The problem with drug tests, other than having to do it in a public place, was having to pee on command. Maybe other people could do it, but Jennifer was the type to be fine, to be fine, and then suddenly have to let it all out at once. That meant sitting there, she had less than zero urge to go, but needed to make herself. So she took another drink and settled in. Five minutes passed. And another and another still with no need to go. So Jennifer played a little game while watching the TV, taking a drink of water every time the home’s on TV were a price that reminded her she’d never be able to own a home. That did the trick. Jennifer went from completely fine to a sudden racing urge, like she had to catch herself to stop a slow trickle from coming out. She stood up and it got worse immediately as gravity did its thing, pressing down on her bladder. This was sure to be a good thing. Maybe she wouldn’t have the same problems going in public. Doing an almost prancing tiptoe to the bathroom, Jennifer tried the door of the one unisex bathroom and it didn’t budge. “Occupied!” the voice inside called. “Dammit,” Jennifer muttered. She stood to the side of the door and rested against the wall, waiting her turn and trying to not think about the growing urge to pee. It was difficult, and her normal position of hugging herself and appearing small served only to put more pressure on her bladder. Time stretched on torturously. Each minute felt like ten, and it wasn’t long before Jennifer had to stop herself from bouncing from foot to foot to take some of the edge off. She did the dance for a couple of seconds, before a man sitting nearby looked up and smiled, recognizing the dance. Her face flushed and she went back to suffering in stillness and silence while the waiting room remained chaotic. Finally there was the sound of flushing, water swirling around the bowl, then the sound of the sink turning on. Jennifer bit her lip suppressing a groan. The sound of the faucet pouring at full blast, even through the door, felt like it was pouring right through her, beckoning her to do the same. She managed to resist. The door to the bathroom opened, the door swinging out towards her. The occupant exited, but right as Jennifer grabbed the door, someone else came in and pulled the door shut behind them. “H-hey!” she protested. “Sorry lady, it’s an emergency!” a man’s voice called out with urgency. Jennifer cursed under her breath, but there was nothing to be done. She looked back, and a number of people were watching her. Whether it was because she was the only person doing anything noteworthy or because they were judging her, Jennifer defaulted to expecting the latter. She took a nearby seat, sample cup tight in her grasp. She honestly thought that sitting would make the urge to pee lessen, if not go away entirely. She was wrong. Sitting there sandwiched between a pregnant woman and a heavyset man, Jennifer did her normal thing of shrinking in on herself and it just made everything so much worse. Gravity wasn’t pulling on her anymore. Instead, the way she was sitting put more pressure on her aching bladder. A good ten minutes had passed since she first needed to go, and like usual the need was growing by the second. Jennifer rocked herself back and forth on the chair, breathing heavily. One leg jiggled wildly on the ground. It somehow made things better in that it gave her something to focus on, and worse as it jostled and stimulated her. She was painfully aware of the urine inside her, sloshing around like waves crashing against the shore. The toilet flushed again. Jennifer sat up straight. The door opened. As soon as the man inside was in the doorway she was out of her chair and pushing past him, closing and locking the door behind her while breathing heavily. She positioned herself over the toilet, pulling her panties down and hiking up her skirt. Holding the cup in position was a pain, but she got it there and pushed. Nothing. Jennifer closed her eyes, trying to drown out the muffled sounds of kids shouting and the TV going to an especially loud commercial. She tried to focus on just relaxing and letting nature take its course. With a grateful sigh, she felt herself shift and the flow start. And then stop immediately after just a couple drops, making the need spike painfully. “You gotta be fucking kidding me,” she said to herself. “Please please please not now.” Jennifer tried to force herself to just let go and pee. God knows she needed to go badly enough, but all the need in the world wouldn’t make her stubborn bladder let go and empty. A knock on the door surprised her into starting a stream. She was so caught off guard she nearly missed the cup entirely, but as soon as she realized she was peeing she clamped down and it was like running into that brick wall. It felt like she was still peeing, without any of the satisfaction. The knock sounded again. “Excuse me, are you done? I really need to go.” This time it was a child’s voice. Turning red, Jennifer wanted to scream at them. She’d barely been in there for like, two minutes! Instead she managed to get out, “No, not done. Please wait.” And then she tried again. It shouldn’t have been so difficult to just fucking pee. It felt like she was peeing. It felt like being in a dream where she was peeing and peeing and peeing and nothing was coming out and every second was worse than the last. Another few drops managed. And then a trickle that stopped almost as soon as it started. Slowly, haltingly, bringing the test cup up to the one third mark. And then the damned kid knocked on the door again. “Please? It’s an emergency.” And to her dismay, the kid kept knocking on the door, a constant tattoo against the wood that consumed her world. “FINE,” Jennifer almost yelled, grabbing some toilet paper and wiping. She put a lid on the sample and washed her hands. Quickly. Grabbing the sample she opened the door. A little girl no older than seven looked up at her. “Thanks,” she said, grinning and showing a missing tooth. It was hard to be mad at her for long. Jennifer gave her a pained smile and went to the receptionist. She held it out. The receptionist sneered at her. “What do you want me to do with it? You put it in the panel in the bathroom. And they’re going to need more than that.” More? It was hard enough to get this out. Jennifer said nothing as she retreated to her seat near the bathroom. Stopping and starting as often as she had was torture. It was worse now, a constant sensation of phantom-peeing. And then it happened. Jennifer reached the point where she knew, without a shadow of a doubt, she could pee in public if she had to. She could pee in public if given the opportunity. All she had to do was wait for the kid to get out of the bathroom and then everything would be fine and she could pee and go home. The minutes passed slowly, tauntingly. The rest of the water hit her bladder and now she was so full she ached. There was no way for her to sit that wasn’t uncomfortable, that didn’t make everything worse. The entire time she stared at the door, silently begging the child to just be done. Now, Jennifer could not only pee in public, she wanted to. She reached the point of silently praying, begging anyone who would hear her that she would do whatever they wanted if it meant some relief. Her panties were wet, and she knew she was starting to leak now, little droplets coming out regardless of how hard she clamped down. The TV changed to a commercial again, suddenly doubling in volume. Jennifer jumped in her seat and the motion made her let go. She was frozen in her seat, unable to move, unable to do anything as the pee finally left her, pouring into her panties and the plastic chair she was sitting in. She wanted to be horrified, disgusted, ashamed, anything. All she felt was relief as she let go. On and on and on it felt like she was peeing forever. And finally, her neighbors noticed. “Oh shit,” said the heavy man beside her, getting up and giving her plenty of room. All the people around her gave her a wide berth as all sound save the TV died down and Jennifer knew they were all watching her. They’d all seen it. Even the receptionist had stood up at her desk to get a better view, shooting Jennifer a look that was half surprised amusement, half pity. Jennifer stood up, feeling the way the warm pee dripped down her legs and pooled around her feet. She took a slow, sloshy step forward, away from the waiting room, painfully aware of how many people had seen her piss herself in public. “I’ll come back tomorrow.”
  14. I haven't tried it yet cause I don't use my computer much but I would love for it to be ported to android!
  15. I would imagine you could use a bedwetting sensor for play like this. I don't know of any that communicate with phone apps, but it's still an idea!
  16. That sounds.. Really nice. I've never held while on edibles / strong extracts so I'll have to try that some time. Just curious why you mix thc and cbd extracts? I've heard cbd actually makes thc less intense, and that it's good to use when you're too high. Did I hear wrong?
  17. I feel your pain! I'm in a similar situation. But my husband and I are getting our own apartment in a few weeks... 😄
  18. That was so close to what I remembered but just the tiiiiniest bit off... like I remember it being way longer. So I was wondering if I remembered wrong and that was it. But then I realized it said that was desperation log part 2. The one I remembered was part 1. I found it, thank you!
  19. Hey. I used to have a video saved to my computer a few years back and I would love to be able to find it again. It was a man doing a holding challenge in a bathroom. I believe he was nude, or he got undressed partway through the video. He was challenging himself to drink cups of water every so often, and to pee into a small cup every so often without overflowing it. As the challenge went on, it got more difficult for him, until eventually he completely lost control. I distinctly remember that he had the clock within view of the camera so you could tell how much time had passed between transitions. I'm fairly certain it was posted in a thread here on the forums, but I can't for the life of me find it. If someone knows where I can find the video that would be super appreciated! Thank you 🙂
  20. Not management, unfortunately. I could probably start holding during my lunch break so I just start to get desperate at the end of my shift, when I tend to be less busy anyway. That could be fun...
  21. Niice. I'm working from home too and I'd love to use that as an excuse to hold. Unfortunately I find being desperate makes me too distracted to do my job, which requires a lot of focus. 😞 I wonder if there's a way I can do it.
  22. What is a bladder stimulator? I'm intrigued.
  23. I didn't use the bathroom during Endgame. Pretty sure I did right before though. There's an app called RunPee that tells you when you should go to the bathroom during movies. I've never used it (I have an iron bladder) but I've heard it's really useful. (Although Paul Rudd suggested the alternative option of peeing in your popcorn bucket under the seat, and Mark Ruffalo suggested diapers. I'm not sure I agree with Rudd there, those things are made of cardboard 😛)
  24. I don't! 😛 It is cool to be able to hold so much, and it's convenient in real life situations, but it means that if I want to get desperate like this I have to be very patient and down a LOT of water. Some days I just don't have the time.
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