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LuierDraakje

Dry Member
  • Posts

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About LuierDraakje

  • Rank
    Dry

My Kinks

  • I'm into..
    Ageplay
    Diapers
    Cuddling
    Furry

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  1. If you're in Europe, try diaper-heroes.be. They might have what you're looking for. Also, Rearz sells Felicity, which are pink printed pull-ups. You can find those at abdlfactory.com
  2. Absolutely the diaper. It was made for the body of a grown adult, and it can be trusted to take a large wetting without leaking.
  3. I have memories of wanting to wear diapers as early as six years old, maybe even younger. The moment that desire started, probably coincided with the moment I discovered I was significantly different from the kids around me. I'm not neurotypical (not autism or disability related), and I realized quite quickly that I looked at the world differently and experienced it in a different way. My parents did the best they could, but there was hardly any knowledge or expertise to help them. My therapist and I concluded I might have developed regressive desired because I wanted to return to the time when my parents fully understood my needs, and I didn't think of the world and social interaction as difficult, confusing and draining yet. I didn't start actually wearing diapers until my teenage years, and didn't actually buy them in larger quantities until my early twenties.
  4. This. This so much. I do think regression and age play is a form of escapism, yes. But just like coping, it should be a temporary thing. I, too, suffer now from subconscious psychological mechanisms I have taught myself to (mentally) survive. I still live by those principles, as they're subconscious and I'm not fully aware of how they're influencing my behavior, self image and decision making. I'm working with my therapist to uncover that, however. Also, these mechanism are still there, even though the situations and circumstances that caused me to apply them are no longer present. Yet, they stunt me in my growth and development towards an emotionally healthy person that can verbalize his feelings when he wants to. My therapist agrees with me that age play and regression in itself is not necessarily harming me, but the fact that I grab that as my method of dealing with something hard, instead of actually dealing with that obstacle - that's when coping mechanisms become unhealthy.
  5. Or you save up longer chapters and post the entire chapter at once. Or you just post each chapter as an individual thread, like other people do. Some people don't like having to login to yet another site. Just sayin'.
  6. Why not post it here? Wattpad is removing diaper content, as far as I know.
  7. I would like to add a little nuance to that: many coping machanisms are okay (I don't like the word "valid", as it implies a whole other debate), in the sense that coping to a certain degree is healthy. When a coping mechanism becomes your primary way of dealing with stress, anxiety and the like, it takes the form of an addiction. As in: you can't function properly without the coping mechanism. I've met plenty of people that use kink or substances or anything one might consider 'vapid', where they instead need therapy, or at least serious self reflection. To anyone reading this: kink is not an appropriate or healthy substitute for therapy. Don't rob yourself of living a better life by assuming kink will solve your problem. It's okay to see a therapist.
  8. I personally don't see "AB" as something you "are", as in: I don't see it as my identity. It's something I'm involved with, but it's not the foundation of who I am, as I also strongly believe that wouldn't be healthy for any person. From personal experience with therapy, I know that parents and babies that have formed a safe attachment, have a way of non-verbally understanding each other. A child can communicate its needs without being able to talk or understand language. The parent can act upon this and give the child what it needs. Once a child grows older and lears to talk, there are factors that I assume can disturb this non-verbal instinctive bond. Factors like being highly gifted, having autism or some other form of neurodivergence, or another (mental) disorder that disturbs verbalization. If a child has the implicit feeling his parents no longer fully understand him, or he has trouble fully communicating his needs (which can be the case with various forms of autism), the child may develop a nostalgic wish to return the time when he didn't need to put so much effort in feeling seen and understood (which is what regression aims to make the regressor experience). This can also be the case with people who suffer trauma in their childhood. This can be physical, emotional, or sexual abuse, but that also includes being bullied as a child - the latter of which many people with infantilism experience (like myself, for instance). I would like to strongly advise you to seek therapy and discuss the above with your therapist - preferably someone who knows clinical psychology. Especially because you mention substance (ab)use, which might just as well be a more "grown-up" form of the same effect I described above. Even more so because you mentioned specifically mushrooms. I agree that using mushrooms or other substance abuse is probably not the root, but a symptom in your case. You mentioned suffering from complex PTSD, so I assume you use a substance to take the edge of whatever bad experience the CPTSD can put you through. I don't have PTSD myself, so I don't have any firsthand experience on that matter. I do think the root is the same, though. What might help you is a form of therapy that lets you deal with or even overcome some of the difficulties that arose somewhere during your childhood.
  9. IV. Little, did he know? Stella was now dressed in fluffy pajama pants, a onesie, and a shirt with a character of a children’s cartoon on it. In her mouth was a large pacifier with a four-leaf clover on the shield, attached to a cord that was clipped to the collar of her shirt. She carried a plush clownfish in both hands that must have been almost two feet long. Rowan tilted his head, pondering why an adult mare would wear such a shirt and carry a large plush animal, let alone have a pacifier. He could clearly hear the loud crinkling of a diaper underneath her clothes, which was not as apparent before. She looked like an oversized toddler in many aspects. It was as if Stella had left and a different mare had entered the living room. The pony sat down on the couch, next to Rowan, and hid most of her face behind the giant clownfish. Celester ruffled her mate’s mane, then sat down on the other side of the couch. The entire display struck Rowan as odd. The way Stella was dressed and behaving was not even the strangest thing to him, but rather the calm and seemingly amused way Celester reacted to it, and how all this seemed normal to both mares. ‘You’re probably wondering what this is all about, aren’t you?’ the unicorn said calmly. ‘I guess... Yeah. Is it okay to ask?’ Stella giggled as Celester kissed her on the forehead. ‘Shall I let you do the talking, filly?’ She nodded and took her pacifier out. ‘When I was a filly, it took me longer than usual to potty train. I’ve always had a weak bladder, which meant I had daytime accidents every now and then when I was in primary school. I often wet the bed, so my parents made me wear diapers. I also had to wear them during long car rides. A few weeks before my tenth birthday, the bedwetting gradually stopped.’ ‘And you didn’t wear diapers anymore?’ ‘Very rarely. Until I started high school. Somehow, the transition to a different school was stressful for me, and my mother suggested I wore diapers again. I was hesitant at first, but it didn’t take long before I remembered being diapered meant no worries about accidents or waking up in a wet bed. They made me feel safe and helped me sleep better, and they still do.’ ‘We met in our third year of high school,’ Celester added. ‘My parents and I had moved here from the other side of the country and I had to rebuild my social circle. Making friends is hard for a black unicorn at that age. When you’re a filly, other kids don’t see you as dangerous. There are a lot of misconceptions about unicorns and our magical abilities, let alone black unicorns. Anyway, we didn’t immediately hit it off, like you would see in any second-rate movie. It took until I got rejected by a stallion I wanted to date. In private, I dropped my cloaking and revealed that I’m a unicorn. Let’s say that didn’t end well.’ ‘I noticed Celester as she entered the bathroom and saw she had been crying. At first, I was mostly concerned with whether she had seen me carrying my diaper bag, until I saw her horn. I had seen her a couple of times before, but it never occurred to me she was a unicorn. I had never met one until then, even though I had wished for it on every birthday I can remember.’ ‘Stella asked me if I was alright, and I told her I got rejected by a guy. She said she felt sorry for me, and since my cloaking was still down, I noticed she was suppressing a laugh. I asked her about it and she said she had never experienced that problem.’ ‘I soon realized I had said something hurtful, so I decided to be honest. I had never been rejected by a stallion, because I only feel attracted to mares.’ ‘Somehow, this triggered something in me. I had considered myself bisexual for a few years, but I had never dated a mare. From that day on, we were best friends. It didn’t take long for Stella to get the obvious out of the way and tell me about her accidents and the diapers she wore for protection.’ ‘Earlier that year, my father died in a workplace accident. For two months straight, I woke up wet every night. After I began having more and more near-accidents during daytime, my mother convinced me to wear diapers during the day as well. I discovered they didn’t just make me feel safe, the diapers also helped me relive a part of my childhood, and experience some of the comfort and security I felt when my dad was still alive. I went looking online and found out there were others. It appeared to be a thing called “infantilism”.’ ‘About a year and a half later, after the finals, Stella finally told me about all that. She explained she liked to pretend she was a filly every now and then, because it helped her cope with stress and sorrow. I soon understood it took great courage to take the risk of sharing such intimate details with me. From that moment, I knew I wanted to share my life with her. A few days later, she regressed in my presence for the first time. Somehow it clicked and I naturally took on a motherly role. I’ve enjoyed taking care of her ever since.’ Rowan took a few moments to let all this sink in. ‘So that’s why you have this collection of picture books?’ ‘I do read to children in the hospital, but yeah.’ ‘Now that you mention it, thanks for tidying up our bookcase. I was expecting you to read a book, but I’m not complaining. I like pleasant surprises.’ He smiled. ‘Speaking of which, I brought a couple of surprises on the way home,’ Celester said triumphantly. ‘The first is in the hallway, and I suggest a certain little pony is going to look for it. It’s in my bag.’ Stella zoomed out of the living room, straight towards where Celester had dropped her bag when she came home. The pony quickly found what she was looking for and returned to the living room, carrying a flat square box. There was a logo of a local bakery printed on the top. ‘Did you buy cake?’ Rowan asked in confusion. ‘Yup. You took the bold action to escape from an abusive situation. Celebration is non-negotiable.’ Stella, who had carried the box to the countertop by now, carefully opened the lid. ‘Carrot cake!’ she shouted. ‘It’s her favorite. Sorry for going by a racial stereotype, but I assumed you’d probably like it too.’ ‘We’ll see if it can beat my grandmother’s recipe,’ Rowan laughed. ‘Stella, be a dear and divide the cake in three pieces. The box with cutlery should be on top of the stack with kitchen stuff. And make us some tea, please.’ ‘Yes, Mommy!’ ‘I’ll go get the other surprise from the car. Be right back.’ She returned carrying a large shopping bag filled with clothes, which she put down next to the coffee table. ‘What’s this?’ ‘I had some time between two appointments, which I decided to put to good use. I searched online for secondhand clothing and found a mother who had just sorted through her teenage son’s clothes. She wanted to sell the collective of whatever didn’t fit him anymore, so she was glad I wanted to take everything. They happened to be rabbits, too. There are no shoes, but I figured you might not need them for a while and I didn’t know if you even prefer to wear them. Stella and I have hooves, so we hardly ever wear shoes. To top it off, I bought you some new underwear as well.’ Rowan wanted to say how grateful he was for their kindness, but the words would not leave his mouth. He tried a few times more, but he kept choking up. Eventually, the rabbit teared up and began to cry uncontrollably. Celester, who had picked up on this just before he started bawling, gently embraced the rabbit and supported him. ‘How can I ever repay you?’ he cried. ‘By stuffing that cake in your face, and celebrating a new chapter in your life,’ Celester replied with a grin. Stella put three mugs on the coffee table and sat down. She patted the space next to her, inviting Rowan to join her. With the now somewhat calmed-down rabbit in the middle, the three dug in. A moment of silent enjoyment followed. ‘So... Apparently, my grandmother’s carrot cake sucks,’ Rowan stated to nobody in particular. ‘One more rabbit in the “not the best they can be”-category,’ Celester said, stifling a laugh. ‘Yeah, I’ve been wanting to ask you, Rowan. How did you end up in such a bad situation? It didn’t exactly happen overnight, did it?’ ‘I met Azalea in high school. In the beginning, we were boyfriend and girlfriend, and all was well. Then I turned eighteen, which apparently was the moment my stepdad was waiting for. Instead of birthday congratulations, I was told I had three days to find a place to live. He would change the door locks over the weekend, and I would no longer be welcome in their house or their life.’ Stella listened with her mouth agape. ‘Why? What did you do wrong?’ ‘Existing. My mother was raped at a party. Her parents were pro-life, so they made it crystal clear she would be kicked out if she had an abortion. Legends say that unwanted rabbit babies are reabsorbed in the womb, and that no rabbit is ever born unwanted, but I guess that’s just a fairytale.’ ‘Do you even know who your real father is?’ ‘Not even his name. I bear my mother’s last name. She called me “Brek”, which means “Bramble”. I assume she did that to piss off her parents, so every time they mentioned me, they’d know my mother only associated me with pain. My stepdad only took care of me because it was illegal to kick me out, and he didn’t want to look bad to his in-laws.’ ‘Wow, what a snake pit. So they threw you out, and that’s when you went to Azalea’s place?’ He nodded. ‘She invited me to stay, and I trusted her. After a few weeks, my contract at the burger joint got terminated, because they had to cut back on personnel. I was out of work for a while, and then something snapped. Azalea understood I had nowhere to go and that I would be on the streets without her. I had only a few friends, and none of them were in a position to take me in. Let alone for free.’ ‘But how did that dilapidate into imprisoning you in her apartment?’ ‘She posed the argument that I should do the household chores as long as I didn’t have a job, so there was more time for us together in the evenings. However, she often went out with her female friends, where I wasn’t welcome of course. Since I only have my high school diploma, finding a job a teenager can’t do wasn’t easy. By then, I was doing almost all chores. Meanwhile, Azalea refused to have sex with me, and noticed I became restless. I was just upset about not getting a job and feeling useless, but she gaslighted me into thinking I was sexually frustrated. To “help me control my urges” she decided to buy me a chastity cage. I protested, but she convinced me to try it, “just to see if it would help”. Things quickly escalated from there.’ ‘That’s awful!’ was all Stella could say. ‘The next morning, I woke up wearing a collar. I know many people wear them, but I never had. I looked beside me and saw Azalea wasn’t next to me in the bed. Another thing I noticed was my phone missing from the nightstand. I heard movement in the living room, so I got up to see what was going on. She sat there, at the dining table, holding a remote. A pen and a sheet of paper laid there on the table, as if they were waiting for me.’ ‘I don’t like where this is going,’ Celester said. ‘Neither did I. She told me there would be some changes as of that day. I was to sign the paper, which basically said I was willingly submitting myself to her, and the chastity and collar were put on me with consent. Of course, I said she was crazy and that I wouldn’t sign the document. I asked for my phone and the key to the cage, because I was leaving. And that’s when she grinned and pressed a button on the remote.’ ‘No... Did she put a shock collar on you?’ Celester asked, trying to control her anger. Rowan slowly nodded. ‘She asked me if I was sure, and I tried to resist. Every time I did, she shocked me, each time longer than before. I kept trying, maybe subconsciously hoping she’d pity me and stop whatever she had planned. Eventually, I nearly blacked out from the pain. With my last strength, I realized the only way to make it stop was to sign the document. She kept the shock collar on me for a few more days, until she was relatively certain of my surrender. By then, she replaced it with the locking collar with the tracking device. I wasn’t allowed to sleep in our bedroom anymore. Instead, I slept in a small side room designed to be a home office or a children’s bedroom. All I had in there was a mattress, the few clothes I owned, some particularly poorly written books about feminism, and a camping toilet.’ ‘This is getting stranger by the minute. Why the latter two?’ Stella inquired. ‘Azalea has a thing for dominating men, as I imagine you’ve deduced by now. She believes women are superior and men should serve women, in the broadest terms imaginable. I wasn’t allowed in the big bed anymore, only if I agreed to have sex with her the way she wanted. That included her taking me from behind with a strap-on, and I think of my butt as an exit only, thank you very much.’ ‘So she banned you from the bedroom and kept you as a literal slave?’ He nodded. ‘Since I wasn’t planning to volunteer for her sexual pleasure, she began bringing home other guys do dominate in our bedroom, during which I was to be in “my room”, with the lights out, not to be seen or heard. That’s what the camping toilet was for.’ A moment of silence filled the living room. The mares contemplated everything Rowan had told them and tried to understand how it made him feel. ‘I can’t even begin to imagine how your life has been in the past two years. It sounds like actual prisoners have a better living standard.’ He sighed. ‘Yeah, I’m glad to be away from her. It’s just... I don’t know where to go from here.’ ‘What do you mean?’ ‘Azalea systematically isolated me from my friends, and my parents made it clear they don’t want me in their life. I’m from a small family, and since I’m the product of rape, I’m not exactly welcome at my aunt and uncle’s place either. The clothes you girls gave me are all I own.’ ‘No bank account? No savings?’ Stella asked. ‘Azalea pressured me into giving up my PIN and plundered my account. It wasn’t much, but I might have been able to pay the first month of rent somewhere. I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place. There’s nowhere I can go.’ ‘Well…’ Celester said slowly, pretending to ponder for a moment. ‘Maybe you don’t have to. You could stay here, with us. Even after your paw has healed, I mean.’ ‘But I don’t want to impose on you. Besides, I don’t have any money. I can’t pay-’ ‘You don’t have to if you can’t. We’re happy to share our home with a cute rabbit like you.’ Rowan’s ears flopped. ‘It’s just… What am I going to do all day? And how am I going to afford rent?’ ‘Don’t worry about that. We’ll give you room and board until you find a job, and then we’ll renegotiate. The rabbit pondered for a moment. ‘It does sound like a really good offer. What’s the catch?’ Celester chuckled. ‘I’m not used to your cunning yet, I see. First of all, now that you know about the nature of my relationship with Stella, I hope you understand we won’t exactly try to keep our dynamic hidden from you. If you’re uncomfortable, just tell us, and we’ll do our best to not push it in your face.’ ‘I kind of expected this. You do you, I guess. Besides, I already told you I got hard from wetting my diaper, so complaining about your dynamic would be somewhat... hypocritical.’ ‘Alright. But wait, there’s more,’ Celester continued like she was in an infomercial. ‘Like I said, we’ll give you a room of your own, and our fridge is your fridge. We’re going to help you find a job, and when you do, we’ll come to an agreement about rent. You’ll pay a fair share of your income, no matter what that might be.’ Rowan nodded. ‘Once you have a job, you and I are going to find you a therapist. You’ve been abused by Azalea for two years, and you grew up in a household that clearly didn’t want you to be a part of it. I can’t imagine what that did to your self-confidence, let alone other social and emotional development. Even my horn picks up your insecurity every now and then.’ The rabbit looked down, close to crying again. Celester put an arm around him, and Stella followed suit. ‘I didn’t say that to hurt your feelings, Rowan. You’ve never had a place where you’re celebrated instead of just barely tolerated. I wish for you to experience what it feels like to have a place you can call “home”. Do you understand that?’ He slowly nodded, and the mares let go of him. ‘That brings us to the last condition. You have to file a complaint against Azalea, at the police station, as soon as possible.’ ‘Why?’ Rowan blurted out. ‘I don’t ever want to see her again. How does filing a complaint help me?’ ‘Abuse is often rooted in trauma or mental illness. That’s not an excuse, but it means she won’t stop on her own. There’s no way she’ll wake up one day and think “You know what? I can’t find my boy toy, let’s straighten up my act and start behaving like a normal person”. Maybe she’ll even decide to find someone to replace you. There’s only one person who can end this, Rowan, and that’s you. At all costs, she must be stopped, so professional people can decide her fate.’ ‘But what about the contract she made me sign?’ ‘If you signed that willingly, would you have escaped the way you did? Wouldn’t there be a way to terminate the contract?’ Rowan remained silent. ‘Did you know most people don’t throw out keys that unlock things they no longer own? I’ve kept your cage and collar, which I can pick in front of the police if they don’t believe you.’ ‘So you’ll go with me?’ ‘Of course, Rowan. You don’t have to do all this on your own. We’re here for you now.’ ‘In that case… I think I’d like to stay.’ ‘Yay!’ Stella exclaimed, tightly hugging Rowan with both arms. ‘Now the formal stuff is out of the way, I believe you shouldn’t wear this diaper much longer,’ Celester said, pointing at the completely blurred blue line down the front. Rowan’s ears flopped. ‘Yeah... Could I maybe take a shower?’ ‘Sure. I’ll help you up the stairs.’ The rabbit let out a content sigh. After all these years, he was finally on his way to better days.
  10. III. Fully booked ‘You’ve mentioned your mate, but where is she?’ Rowan asked as they cleared the table. ‘We’ve shared her apartment during the renovations here. She is there for the final inspection with the landlord, and to return our keys. She’ll be here around lunchtime, I guess.’ ‘Does she know I’m here?’ ‘I texted her before I went downstairs this morning, so she won’t be surprised when she finds you here today.’ ‘Wait, that sounds like you’re leaving. Where are you going?’ ‘I have some other errands to run, and seeing as you’re not clothed, I can’t take you with me. The washing machine will take another hour and a half, and I can’t spare that time.’ ‘Oh, okay. Perhaps this is a dumb question, but is there anything I can do for you?’ ‘Yup. Take some rest, and don’t hurt yourself. If you want to pass some time, the stack of boxes closest to the couch contain mostly books. There’s many kinds of books there, as Stella and I have a broad taste.’ She went into the hallway, but quickly returned, holding a crutch. ‘The hospital gave you this to make it easier for you to walk around. You can use it to get to the toilet for when you, well... for when you don’t want to use your diaper.’ Rowan looked confused for a moment, then scrunched up his face. ‘Gross.’ ‘Glad we agree on that,’ Celester laughed. ‘Did I forget anything? Oh, of course, your painkillers. I left the package of pills from the hospital on the countertop. Take one every six hours.’ ‘What do I do if I need a clean diaper?’ ‘I’ve put two spares and a package of wipes on the coffee table. You probably won’t need both, but there’s no such thing as “too many diapers”. One last question for you, and I want you to be completely honest with me. Would it make you feel safer if I locked the door when I leave, or does that make you feel trapped?’ ‘Actually, I’d prefer it if you did lock the door. I know it sounds crazy, but I’m not fully convinced Azalea is just going to let me go.’ ‘Our landline was installed last week, so you can use the phone in case of emergency. It has mine and Stella’s number in its memory.’ ‘Thanks. Do you have any idea when you will be back?’ ‘Late afternoon, probably. Keep calm, and lie down when you feel like you need to. See you!’ ‘Bye,’ Rowan said sheepishly. He just stood there for a while, listening. The sound of the front door being closed and locked, a car door, the engine starting, Celester driving away. It took a few minutes before it dawned on Rowan he was alone, in a stranger’s house, and he couldn’t get out. In some way, it felt familiar, but he soon realized Celester had locked the door for his safety. She was Azalea’s polar opposite in many aspects. The unicorn even had a motherly aura around her. Sweet and caring, even though she had no obligation to be so kind and generous to Rowan. He looked around the living room again. There had to be something he could do to pass time. He couldn’t move furniture on his own, even if he knew where it should go. At random, he opened one of the boxes near the couch. It contained books, like Celester said. The first one was a sturdy hardcover book with a spine on the cover. It looked very much like someone with a degree in a medical field would own. It read Manual Therapy for Equines and Bovines, and appeared to be part of a series. As he carefully looked at the other books in the box, Rowan got an idea. He didn’t feel like reading, but he could make himself useful by unpacking the books and organizing them. He began unpacking all the boxes of the stack Celester had pointed out, neatly sorting them by category. Apparently, the unicorn wasn’t joking when she said they had a broad taste. He found more medical books, some about law, and quite a few “chick lit” romance novels. The contents of the next box surprised him, however. It contained various picture books and other books aimed at children in primary school. Another box was filled with princess-themed stories. Rowan wondered why the mares owned these books, as he was sure they had no children. Pondering this question, he went back to the kitchen and made himself another mug of tea. It proved quite the challenge to move with a crutch while also trying not to spill a mug of blistering hot liquid, but he managed. After all, Rowan had all the time in the world. As he waited for his tea to cool down sufficiently to be drinkable without vulcanizing his throat, he checked a few more boxes. Eventually, he came to a point where the amount of books was roughly proportional to the available space in the bookcase. He stared at the various stacks of books he had carefully piled up and wondered how much time had passed. He wasn’t in a hurry, but he wondered if he could finish before Stella came home. By now, his tea was drinkable. As he took the first sip, a familiar sensation hit him - he had to pee. Annoyed, he gently put down the mug and reached for the crutch, setting out for the toilet. He then realized there was no need for such a trip. Instead, he sat back down, drank some more tea, and tried to relax his sphincter. It still took effort, albeit a little less than the previous time. With his eyes closed, Rowan cherished the growing warmth in the front of his diaper. The stream of pee made a faint hissing noise, pooling around his bits before finally being absorbed by the soft fluff. He finished his tea, as he waited to be sure his diaper was done absorbing everything. The thought of just sitting there at the kitchen table and wetting his diaper without hesitation made him slightly hard again. Rowan idly rubbed the now squishy front of his diaper, feeling his erection growing as he did. Suddenly he stopped, realizing things would get pretty awkward if he actually masturbated to completion in his diaper. The padding could take a lot more, and he wasn’t planning to explain to either of the mares why he changed out of a diaper he had wet only once. He carefully got back on his paws - or rather, one paw and the crutch. Rowan felt the diaper had swollen up around his bits and between his legs. He enjoyed the feeling so much it made him forget about everything outside of the living room. In a slow but steady pace, he began organizing the bookshelf. Save for the picture books, the majority of the literature had been tidied up now, neatly categorized by subject or genre. In the meantime, Rowan had taken another tea break, during which he had managed to wet his diaper again. Just as he had gotten up to sort through the picture books, he heard the sound of footsteps on the gravel driveway. He made his way to the kitchen window and saw a sand-colored pony with a white mane, dressed in dark jeans and a bright red coat. He listened carefully. A key in the lock, the front door being opened, the pony thoroughly wiping her hooves. She gently opened the living room door. Being conscious of his own diaper, Rowan immediately noticed a tell-tale bulge in the pony’s pants. It struck him as odd, since Celester had only said she wore diapers to bed. ‘Hiya!’ she greeted. ‘You must be Rowan. Nice to meet you.’ ‘And I suppose you’re Stella?’ ‘The one and only,’ she replied cheerfully, striking a pose. ‘I see you’ve been busy.’ ‘I didn’t feel like reading, so... I do hope you girls were planning to keep that bookcase where it is, or I’ve done all this for nothing,’ he laughed. ‘Actually... no, just kidding. You did a great job so far.’ ‘It’s ordered by subject and genre. I’ve managed to get everything in, except the picture books. I guess they’ll fit on the bottom shelves, but I have no idea how to order them.’ ‘Like you did with the others,’ Stella said matter-of-factly. ‘Say what?’ ‘They might be targeted at children, but that doesn’t matter. There’s categories for those as well. There’s fairy tales, educational picture books, silly stories without a moral, and bedtime stories, to name a few. The latter don’t go in here, by the way.’ ‘Why not?’ ‘I keep those somewhere else.’ ‘Oh, okay. Can I ask you a blunt question?’ ‘Sure, fire at will.’ ‘You and Celester don’t have foals, do you?’ ‘Nope.’ ‘Then what’s with all these picture books?’ ‘I’ve collected those for years. It started with a series about a pony who wanted to be a unicorn princess. When I was a filly, I used to put on a pink frilly dress and imagine I was the pony in those stories. Little did I know I’d fall in love with my very own unicorn princess years later. My collection kept growing over the years, until Celester made me prune it before we moved.’ ‘There were even more?’ Rowan blurted out. ‘I used to own about three times as many as you see here. Most of it is in storage. I donated a lot of them to the hospital, where I read to children every few weeks.’ ‘That’s a nice way of volunteering. I’ve had my fair share of hospitals for a while, though, if you don’t mind.’ Stella giggled. ‘Of course. How is your paw, by the way?’ ‘Still sore, but the brace and the painkiller help a lot. It’s mainly annoying that I need to think about everywhere I want to go, and that I’m slower than a tortoise.’ ‘As a rabbit, are you usually a fast runner?’ ‘That depends on whether or not my ex is anywhere near,’ he said sarcastically. She suppressed a chuckle. ‘On a completely different note, this diaper feels pretty full. I feel really embarrassed to ask, but I’ve never changed a diaper in my life, and I assume my ankle won’t make it easier. Could you please help me?’ ‘Of course! I’ll be right back.’ Stella hurried out of the living room and stomped up the stairs, before Rowan could remind her of the spare diapers on the coffee table. She returned carrying what looked like a large and thick quilted cloth sheet. It was covered with a print of butterflies in many vibrant colors. ‘What’s that?’ Rowan inquired as Stella spread out the sheet on the floor. ‘A changing mat. The floor is cold and hard, so this is mostly for comfort. It’s also absorbent, which is super useful if you overestimate the capacity of your diaper. It happens to me every now and then.’ Rowan pointed towards the spare diapers on the coffee table. Stella took one and unfolded it. She fluffed it up a little, then put it down on the changing mat. ‘Go lie down on the diaper for me please. Take your time.’ Rowan’s ears flopped. He slowly sat down on the diaper, then laid back. ‘Are you nervous?’ He nodded quickly. ‘Can you tell me why?’ He shrugged. ‘I know you asked me to change you, but are you okay with me seeing you naked?’ He nodded again. ‘It’s just... I suppose changing a diaper is routine for you, but this is the second one I wore since I was a child.’ ‘Can I touch your belly?’ He tilted his head. ‘Um, yeah? Why?’ Stella remained silent. Instead, she let her hands do the talking. For a few minutes, she gently touched his belly, moving her hands to his hips and sides, and back to the front again. Slowly, Rowan’s breathing slowed down and his muscles relaxed. ‘There you go. That’s better, isn’t it?’ He nodded. The comfortable silence was broken by the sound of the velcro tabs being undone. A slightly cold draft his Rowan’s bits as Stella folded the warm wet diaper away. She grabbed a wipe and began carefully cleaning his private area. It didn’t take long before Rowan felt himself get hard. His ears flopped and he covered his eyes with his hands. ‘What’s up, Rowan? Did I do something wrong? Did I touch you somewhere I shouldn’t have?’ He shook his head. ‘Would you please tell me what’s wrong?’ He remained silent for a while, picking his words. ‘It’s... I’ve worn a chastity cage for two years. The only time I was let out was twice a week, to shower. I had to stand with my hands behind my head while my ex used the shower head to clean me up. Quite roughly, I might add.’ ‘So this is the first time in two years someone not nasty is touching you there?’ He quickly nodded again. ‘I’m so sorry for you, Rowan. That’s awful. I’m done cleaning your front now, by the way. Could you lift up for me?’ He tried to the best of his ability. Stella pulled the wet diaper away, then made quick work of cleaning the lower part of Rowan’s butt. Even with his strong rabbit paws, it took quite the effort to keep his butt from the changing mat long enough. He let himself drop with a sigh when Stella announced she was “all done!”. ‘I’m not an expert on male anatomy, nor on rabbits for that matter, but your, um... pee pee should be pointed downwards when you’re wearing a diaper, right?’ ‘It was, yeah.’ Rowan said, still covering his eyes. ‘Well that’s a bit of a problem. How long does that usually take to, um... y’know, get back to its normal state?’ ‘You ask that like it was yesterday.’ ‘Oh, the cage. Right, sorry. Guess we’ll have to wait and see, right?’ ‘This is so awkwardly embarrassing,’ Rowan said mostly to himself. ‘I have an idea!’ Stella exclaimed. ‘Shall I read you a story? It might take your mind off of, well, laying on the floor half naked.’ ‘You’re going to read a picture book to me?’ ‘If it works for anxious children, it might help you. I’ll pick one where the pictures aren’t that important, so you can just keep your eyes covered.’ ‘Oh, okay.’ ‘I’m going to read one of my favorite stories to you. I sometimes read it when Celester is angry at me. It’s called “The Grumpy Unicorn”.’ Rowan chuckled at the bizarre form of passive aggression. Stella began reading the story, telling about an atypical unicorn that didn’t like rainbows, singing, dancing, or speaking in rhyme. It felt weird to him at first, but after a couple of pages, Rowan even became engrossed in the story. He didn’t even notice Stella folding the front of the clean diaper over his privates, until the sound of the first tape being applied caught his sensitive ears. He assumed Stella knew the story by heart, as she continued on as if nothing happened. ‘And so after a big journey and all this time, the grumpy unicorn finally learned to speak in rhyme,’ she finished. ‘All done, Rowan. Want me to help you up?’ ‘Do you know this story by heart?’ he blurted out. ‘Yup! I love weird stories that break down overused stereotypes.’ ‘To each their own, I guess.’ She shrugged and began folding up the changing mat. ‘Have you had lunch yet? I bought us my favorite oatmeal rolls.’ ‘Any fresh rabbit-friendly food sounds good to me at this point,’ Rowan laughed. ‘Great. I suggest you make your way to the kitchen, and I’ll dispose of this upstairs,’ she replied, holding up the wet diaper. ‘Be right back.’ Rowan’s peaceful sleep was abruptly ended by the familiar sound of a front door being slammed shut. He felt his muscles tense up. ‘She’s home,’ was all he could think. His eyes shot open, ready for the next string of verbal abuse from Azalea, until he realized he wasn’t in her apartment anymore. He then remembered he had taken another dose of painkillers after lunch and passed out on the couch. He let out a quiet sigh and turned around, subconsciously deciding to sleep some more, but the door to the hallway was left ajar. His sensitive ears caught a conversation. ‘Hiya mommy, I’ve missed you!’ Stella said. “Mommy”? Did her mother come for a visit? To help with the furniture or something? Rowan thought. ‘I’ve missed you too, pony. Have you been a good filly?’ Celester? Why would Stella call her “mommy”? ‘Uh-huh.’ ‘How is our guest doing?’ ‘Fine, I guess,’ her response sounded hurried. ‘He’s asleep on the couch.’ ‘I see. Are you doing the potty dance?’ ‘Yes, mommy. I need to go really bad.’ ‘What did I tell you about holding your pee?’ ‘That I don’t hafta.’ ‘Then why are you doing the potty dance?’ ‘Cause my diaper is really full and I don’t want it to leak. I want you to change me.’ ‘Alright then, go to our room. Be gentle on the stairs.’ The two girls went up the staircase and into their room, where Stella quickly shut the door and took her clothes off. She spread out the changing mat on the floor, as they hadn’t installed their bed yet. Celester searched through a nearby box and dug up a package of wipes, talcum powder, an insert, and a thick diaper with purple sides and butterflies down the center. ‘How long have you been holding it?’ Celester asked as she undid the tapes of Stella’s diaper. ‘Two hours. Hurry, please. I’m practically bursting.’ Stella lifted up, so Celester could take the wet diaper away. ‘Soaked from front to back. Good girl!’ She made quick work of the tapes on the fresh diaper, then sat down on one knee and rolled up the wet one. Stella got on her hooves and quickly felt around her diaper, checking the elastic leg gathers. ‘All clean,’ Celester said, still on one knee. ‘Does Mommy get a hug?’ The pony tightly embraced her partner, holding the unicorn’s head on her chest. Celester put one arm between her mate’s shoulders and the other on the back of her diaper, between her legs. ‘Good girl. Now show Mommy what little ponies do.’ A loud hissing was heard as Stella sighed and let her bladder loose. The insert took the first part of the beating, but Celester soon felt the warm wetness creep towards the middle part of the diaper. The mares nuzzled and kissed as Stella slowly finished her wetting. ‘Done?’ Another deep sigh. ‘Yes Mommy. Thankies.’ ‘Wow, look at the front! Even with the booster in there, you still managed to make a lot of butterflies disappear!’ Stella shyly giggled. ‘I had to go really bad Mommy, but I saved it for you.’ ‘You’re adorable. it’s a shame to cover up your diaper, but modesty is probably the better choice now we have a guest. We should find you something equally as cute and comfortable to wear.’
  11. II. Rest assured It was still dark when Rowan woke up, under a duvet, laying down on what he assumed to be a couch. He tried to sit up, but as soon as he did that, it felt like what little he could see of his surroundings was spinning like he was on a merry-go-round. Immediately, he laid back down and put his right paw on the floor, hoping this would stabilize him. As the dizziness slowly faded, he tried to recall the events of the past evening. The escape, falling and hurting his paw, leaving the city in the rain, and getting picked up by Celester. Come to think of it, he could not remember what she looked like. For some reason, he even had no clue about her species. The only thing he knew was that she had black fur. She took him to the hospital to have his paw looked after. As he remembered that, his focus shifted to his left ankle, where he felt some kind of sleeve. A brace to support his sprained ankle, he remembered. It then occurred to him that he was not wearing his pants or shirt anymore. Celester probably took his clothes off because they were cold and wet. He then reached for his neck and realized he hadn’t been dreaming – she did unlock his collar and take it off. Rowan slowly sat up again and realized why he woke up. He had to pee, and quite badly so. The room around him didn’t spin as much anymore, but he still felt like he was on a boat. As he moved to put both paws on the floor, his sensitive ears caught a faint crinkling sound. He sat still and listened, but couldn’t pick up where it came from. Until he scooted over a little to stand up, that is. With that movement, he noticed something soft but firm, somewhat pressing his legs apart, and a slightly tickling feeling around the base of his tail. Instinctively, he flexed his perineum, which would usually make him immediately aware of the sturdy stainless steel ring of his chastity cage around his balls. To his surprise, he felt no such resistance. Instead, he felt something soft gently press against his bits, where he would normally feel the confinement of the tube part of the cage. He had worn the cage continuously for almost two years. Had Celester managed to pick that lock as well? In disbelief, he slowly slipped his left hand down to investigate whether or not he was still wearing the torturous device. Where he expected to feel the waistband of his boxer shorts, his fingers felt something smooth and made of plastic. With both hands, he felt around the garment and quickly felt two large velcro tabs on either hip. The slightly tickling feeling was an elastic hole in the back for his tail. Judging by all this, and what his eyes could make out in the near-darkness, there was only one conclusion: a diaper. ‘How did I end up in a diaper? Did they put me in this in the hospital?’ he whispered to himself. Shrugging mentally, he got up. He walked over to where he noticed a faint light around a light switch, but regretted that decision as soon as he finished his first step. For a short time, his full weight had been resting on his injured paw. A sharp jolt of pain shot up from his paw, making Rowan tumble backwards. He could not suppress a yelp as he fell over. Trying to regain his composure, he noticed a growing warm wetness on his balls. In a split second, he understood he was wetting himself. Rowan clenched as hard as he could, but the strong flow would not stop. The warm urine made the tip of his penis tingle. It took a while, and a few deep breaths, before Rowan had calmed down again. His hands idly slid over the now warm plastic backing. It then dawned on him that he, a full grown adult buck, had just emptied his entire bladder in a diaper. Even worse, he slowly felt a pressing feeling against his penis increase in strength. ‘Does this… am I getting an erection? Why does this make me hard?’ He cupped the padding with both hands, feeling his bits through the squishy diaper. His ears suddenly picked up the sounds of footsteps on a nearby staircase. He quickly grabbed the duvet and covered himself, hoping the hardness would fade. A door on the other side of the room opened, and a hand reached through, flipping the nearby light switch. A black unicorn with her mane dyed icy blue stood in the doorframe, with a concerned look on her face. ‘Rowan, are you okay? I thought I heard you stumble.’ ‘I did, actually,’ he said, blinking to make his eyes adjust to the light. ‘Did you hurt yourself?’ ‘It could have been worse. I woke up because I had to pee, and I more or less forgot I had better not put my full weight on my paw.’ Celester grimaced. ‘Do I need to help you get to the toilet?’ His ears flopped and he looked away. ‘I kinda don’t need to go anymore.’ ‘Oh? Oh… I see. Did the diaper do its job?’ Rowan tilted his head. ‘No leaks?’ He quickly felt around the diaper. ‘I guess not.’ ‘I’m sorry you didn’t know. You passed out in the car on the way here, and since I knew you’d wake up in an unfamiliar environment, I figured it might help you not to have to hurry to find a toilet in the morning.’ Rowan raised his eyebrows. ‘A little weird, but thanks, I guess? At least I didn’t pee all over the couch.’ ‘That’s what my mate said when she first wore those.’ ‘Say what?’ ‘You’re probably wondering why I even have diapers here, let alone in your size.’ ‘Now that you mention it, how did that happen?’ ‘My mate Stella… She has some bladder issues. She needs to wear diapers whenever she sleeps, if we want to keep our bed dry. Putting you in one was merely practical. I’m sorry for invading your personal space.’ ‘I see. It’s just… It weirds me out a little, okay?’ Celester grinned. ‘What, exactly? Wearing a diaper, or wetting yourself? It wasn’t your fault, you know. I’m just glad I took precautions.’ ‘The relief did feel kinda good, to be honest. Did you also, y’know... I was wearing a chastity device before we met.’ Celester idly twirled the end of her mane around her finger. ‘Yeah, based on what you told me about Azalea, I figured you wouldn’t mind me taking that thing off as well. I’m glad you didn’t wake up while I was in the middle of picking that lock.’ Rowan looked away shyly. ‘That would’ve been extremely awkward.’ ‘Speaking of awkward, there’s no subtle way for me to ask, so I’ll get to the point. Do you want a clean diaper?’ ‘ I don’t know. I mean, it doesn’t feel dirty or uncomfortable or anything, it’s just a bit squishy. Or do you think I should take it off?’ ‘May I?’ Celester asked, extending her hand. Rowan nodded. She gently felt around the front of his diaper, gouging how much of the capacity he had used. Rowan was still a bit hard, but she either didn’t notice or just didn’t mention it. ‘You could easily keep this one on until morning. I’ll help you shower, if you need to.’ ‘That’s kind of you. I guess I’d better catch some more sleep then.’ ‘Yeah, me too. In case you haven’t noticed, there’s a glass of water for you on the coffee table. See you in a few hours. Sleep well.’ ‘Thanks. See you in the morning.’ Celester quietly shut the door behind her and returned upstairs. Rowan looked at the glass of water. Now that he thought about it, he was thirsty. With a few big gulps, he downed the glass. He hopped to the light switch on his right paw, turned it off, then waited for his eyes to adjust to the darkness. He soon found his way back to the couch, got under the covers, and fell asleep. A few hours later, the first rays of sunlight gently woke him up. Again, Rowan felt the need to pee, and he remembered the glass of water he had drunk in the middle of the night. As he sat up, he immediately became aware of the diaper snugly taped around his hips. Out of curiosity, he tried to pee in the diaper again. However, it felt like his body refused to cooperate. He tried laying down, sitting, standing - nothing seemed to work. Standing up proved challenging for a different reason. Whatever medication he had received at the hospital had probably stopped working by now, and he became clearly aware of the pain in his left ankle. It was continuously present and quite uncomfortable. He wouldn’t be able to sleep without a painkiller. Rowan sat back down on the couch, wrapped himself in the duvet, and closed his eyes. After a few minutes, he was finally sufficiently relaxed. A stream of warm urine flowed over his balls and into the padding of the diaper. It felt like there was no end to the amount of pee. The wetness even crept upwards in the back. Rowan felt around the front of the diaper, afraid it was leaking. The outside was still as dry as before his first wetting, although his recent peeing had warmed the plastic up. He felt himself get hard again, and stopped touching the diaper, afraid he might do something he’d regret later. A little while later, as Rowan was still enjoying the pleasant warmth around his bits, Celester quietly entered the room. She was dressed casually in jeans and a dark green hoodie. ‘Good morning, Rowan. Slept well?’ ‘The best in months, even with the ankle.’ ‘Now that you mention it, I’ll give you a painkiller at breakfast. Do you need help cleaning up?’ He gave her a confused look. ‘Since you’ve used your diaper, I mean.’ ‘How did you know?’ he blurted out. ‘Because your stumbling woke me up in the middle of the night, and you told me yourself?’ Celester replied, equally confused. A short, awkward silence followed. ‘Or did you mean you used it again?’ He nodded. ‘Did the second time make you feel any different?’ ‘No,’ he said softly. ‘Why did you ask?’ ‘Unicorns are emotionally highly sensitive. I can very easily pick up on other people’s moods and feelings. So easily, in fact, that I’ve had to teach myself to shut off that sense when I’m in public spaces. If I don’t do that, I can get overwhelmed. I don’t suppress it when I’m at home, because Stella isn’t emotionally volatile, and she doesn’t mind me reading her without talking. I... When I checked on you last night, I had forgotten to suppress my sense.’ Rowan’s ears folded and he looked away. ‘What did it tell you?’ ‘That you didn’t seem to mind wearing the diaper.’ He nodded, still avoiding eye contact. ‘And you didn’t mind using it either, did you?’ ‘No,’ he almost whispered. Celester picked up his shame. ‘Should I have rather not told you this?’ He shrugged. ‘Or are you ashamed?’ Rowan nodded. ‘Of what? Using a diaper I put you in for our collective convenience?’ He shook his head. ‘Then what are you ashamed of?’ ‘That I got hard after I did it. It felt really good to pee in the diaper, but I’m confused as to why. Part of me says it’s because I had to go really bad, another part of me said I only got hard because I’m no longer wearing my cage.’ ‘Does a chastity device prevent you from getting turned on by something?’ ‘I guess not. And it’s also a bit confusing to talk about sex with someone I met just yesterday. You’ve been nothing but kind to me and I really appreciate your hospitality, but it’s...’ Rowan suddenly tensed up and began shaking a bit. He took a few sharp breaths, as tears welled up in his eyes. ‘I’ve worn that damn cage for nearly two years. I’ve never had sex with Azalea, because she “didn’t want me inside her”. She locked me up because she didn’t trust I would keep my promise to not have sex with her until she was ready.’ ‘But did she become okay with it?’ ‘Never. I should’ve left her when she brought up the cage, but I was naive and it wasn’t like I had anywhere else to go. A day turned into a week, and a week into a month. My balls were aching at that point. She offered to take me with her strap-on, but I refused. I don’t feel the desire to have anything inside me either, y’know? She then said we had to do something about my balls.’ ‘So she let you out to do it yourself?’ ‘No!’ Rowan cried. ‘She used a vibrator to bring me close to an orgasm, then switched it off just before I came. I didn’t feel anything, but I had blown the biggest load I had ever seen.’ He sighed. ‘She then said “Look how much you produced. You must surely like this”, and decided for the both of us that she’d keep me locked up. There was no way I was ever going to have sex with her. All she gave me was one orgasm a month, which I didn’t even get to feel. She called it “milking”.’ ‘That sounds horrible! And now you’re confused because you can finally get an erection again after two years, and you get one after using a diaper?’ He quickly nodded, still crying. Celester sat down next to him and put an arm around his shoulder, gently rubbing his back. ‘It’s okay, Rowan. Whatever the reason might be, I don’t judge you.’ ‘So you don’t think it’s weird for a stranger to tell you about his non-existent sex life?’ Celester chuckled. ‘I admit it’s not a common subject, but I don’t mind. What’s more important is whether you are okay with talking about it. You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want me to know, okay?’ He nodded. ‘And before you ask, I’m not going to share these kinds of personal things with Stella.’ ‘Thanks. Even though the diaper apparently doesn’t bother me that much, I’d rather keep it between us. It’d be rude to say “I used a diaper and even enjoyed it” to someone who needs them.’ Celester chuckled. ‘There are two challenges, however. First of all, I put all your clothes in the washing machine yesterday, and I switched it on this morning. I didn’t realize at the time, but I put your underwear in there as well.’ ‘Oh. So what now?’ ‘Well... since you just acknowledged you don’t mind wearing a diaper, would you be okay with me putting you in a clean one after I help you wash yourself?’ He thought about it for a moment. ‘That’d be a bit weird, but the other option is running around naked, which I don’t think is a better idea.’ ‘The “naked” part, or the “running” part?’ Celester joked. They both laughed. ‘It’s good to see you laugh, Rowan. I’m glad you feel comfortable with me, even though we met in a strange way.’ ‘And our current situation isn’t exactly commonplace either.’ ‘Neither will the next one be. Our bathroom is upstairs, but I suppose you’d better not try to climb the staircase if you don’t have to.’ ‘It wasn’t on my to-do list, now that you mention it.’ ‘You know what? I’ll gather some things so you can clean yourself up, and then I’ll give you a new diaper.’ ‘Are you... Could you please help me with that? I’ve never put a diaper on myself, and my ankle probably isn’t going to help.’ ‘Sure thing. I’ll be right back.’ Celester left the living room and went upstairs. Rowan took the time to look around. The spacious living room was mostly filled with boxes and stacked-up furniture. A dinner table was set, but there were only two chairs. In the corner was an empty bookcase. The couch he sat on was put down haphazardly, in the middle of the room, next to a stack of boxes. The coffee table appeared to be the only piece of furniture to be in the vicinity of “the right place”. He looked at the duvet, which was covered in cartoon characters of a show he didn’t recognize. It struck him as odd, but he paid it no further mind. His attention shifted to his diaper. The soft plastic outside was completely white, save for subtle markings near the waistband. Rowan assumed those were to help put the diaper on correctly. The front of the diaper was yellowed and swollen, and a faded blue line ran down the middle. It wasn’t long before Celester returned, carrying an assortment of items. She put everything down on the coffee table and spread out a towel on the floor. ‘Go stand on there, please. Take your time.’ The unicorn grabbed a bar of soap and a washcloth and walked over to the kitchen. Rowan heard the sound of running water for a while. ‘There we go,’ she said triumphantly. ‘I’ll support you on your injured side, so you can clean yourself. When you’re done, use the other towel to dry yourself off.’ Rowan nodded in agreement. Celester handed him the washcloth and undid the tapes of his diaper. She effortlessly rolled it up and put it aside. ‘Now comes the intimate part,’ she said as she calmly put an arm around the rabbit and offered him support. Rowan carefully cleaned his private area with the washcloth, grateful his erection had subsided by now. When he was done, he thoroughly dried himself off. In the meantime, Celester had prepared a clean diaper on the couch, which she invited him to lay down on. After applying some talcum powder, she taped up his diaper with motions that implied experience. ‘There you go. Feel better?’ ‘Yeah, thanks.’ She handed him a light green shirt with a print similar to the characters on the duvet. ‘This is one of Stella’s shirts she wears to bed. She’s about as tall as you are and has a similar build, so I assume it’ll fit you.’ Rowan quickly threw the shirt on. ‘Not a perfect fit, but I’m not picky. Thanks again.’ ‘Good, um...’ Celester said, pausing for a moment as if she was about to say something. ‘Good for you. Are you hungry?’ As if on cue, Rowan’s stomach growled. They laughed and went to the kitchen. Celester filled the kettle and switched it on. ‘I only have alfalfa bread and raspberry jam for now, do rabbits eat that?’ Celester asked, with most of her head inside the fridge. ‘That’s fine with me. Back home, I wasn’t allowed to have breakfast before Azalea was done.’ ‘Wow, she treated you like you were her pet dog,’ she said disapprovingly, putting the food on the table. As if on cue, the kettle switched off, indicating the water was hot. They ate in silence for a few minutes, until Celester spoke up. ‘Do you have anywhere you can stay?’ Rowan looked down and remained silent. ‘Nowhere?’ ‘After a few months, Azalea started telling our neighbors and my friends that I was diagnosed with agoraphobia. She made it look like she was generous taking care of the fragile rabbit that was too scared to go outside.’ ‘The perfect cover, so to speak.’ Rowan nodded. ‘I looked at her phone while she was in the shower once, and noticed she had recently texted with my best friend. In a few subsequent conversations, she had subtly told him all kinds of lies about me. He doesn’t want to see me ever again.’ ‘That’s harsh. I can’t imagine how that feels for you.’ ‘I’m at a loss for words. My parents won’t take me in, and even if they would, that would just be another abusive situation. I have no money, no job and no serious job history. Oh, and I assume Azalea still has my ID.’ ‘There is no end to her evil, is there? You know what? I work at Civil Affairs at the city hall. I’ll ask around what you can do. Maybe they can declare your old ID void and make you a new one.’ Rowan wanted to speak up, but she continued. ‘And don’t worry, I’ll cover the costs.’ ‘Why are you so kind to me?,’ he asked softly. ‘You hardly know me.’ ‘Life has been hard enough on you already. And, well... I told you I was a troublemaker in my teenage years, right? When I was sixteen, someone helped me to get into way less trouble with the law than I should have been. It kept me out of jail, and made me realize I had to change. When my community service was done, I promised I would one day show my gratitude by paying forward the kindness that was shown to me.’ ‘So you’re helping me to clear your conscience?’ Rowan laughed. ‘Mostly, yes,’ she joked. ‘Jokes aside, I’m helping you because I’m in a position to afford it, and I’m grateful for being where I am today. That’s why I asked if you have anywhere to go. If you want to, you can stay with us, at least until your paw has healed. That would give us four to six weeks to plan whatever comes next. Would you be okay with that?’ Tears welled up in Rowan’s eyes. He tried to speak, but he couldn’t get a single word out of his mouth. He vigorously nodded instead.
  12. Warning: this story features themes that may be shocking to some readers, especially those who have experienced traumatic events concerning violence and/or abuse. Reader discretion is advised. Note: I'm posting the first three chapters of this story as a try-out. Once the story is completed, I will begin posting on a regular basis, and on other platforms as well. The story will feature ABDL content from chapter 2. I. Hop into the Unknown ‘Brek! Get your rabbit ass over here, now!’ Oh, how he hated that name. He had told her time and time again not to call him that. It was the name his mother gave him when he was born. He had changed it as soon as he found out his father was actually his stepfather, and he himself was the result of his mother getting drugged and raped. He slowly made his way over to the living room, where his girlfriend gathered some of her personal items and put them in her purse. ‘I'm going out with the girls tonight. I'll be back at midnight, so don't wait up for me. I expect the dishes to be done when I get back.’ After two years of living with Azalea, he knew pretty much everything she wanted and when. He also knew not to interrupt her or make sarcastic comments, because she would just make up additional chores. ‘While you're at it, clean the kitchen. And have a load of laundry done. Be in your room when I come back and don't let me see your face before tomorrow morning.’ He knew why. Sometimes, she would take home guys and have her way with them. Rabbits, hares, other somewhat related species - Azalea wasn't too picky. This time, she could be sure she wouldn't see him before sunrise. Ever since she had thrown a full pot of tea at him a few days ago - and only barely missed him - it suddenly dawned on him that he didn't have to endure all this if he didn't want to. It was as if all the fear for whatever she threatened to do to him if he ever left her, had dissolved on that instant. From that moment on, Rowan had been planning his escape. There were some obstacles, however. They lived in an apartment on the sixth floor, and Azalea always locked the door when she left. Rowan didn't have a key. Second, the collar he wore around his neck wasn't just locked, it had a GPS tracker attached to it as well. As soon as he would leave the house, she would get a message. To prevent that message, he had sabotaged her phone. When it was charging earlier, he had put pulled the charger out just a little bit, so it wouldn't actually charge. Shortly before it would be done, he put Azalea's phone in her purse and tidied up her charger somewhere else. This way, the battery of her phone would probably be dead somewhere in the next two hours. Rowan would be left with only one hurdle: leaving the apartment. In case his plan failed, or Azalea would notice her battery status and return home for her charger, he reluctantly started doing the dishes. When he had finally cleaned the kitchen, an hour and a half had passed. Rowan decided he had waited long enough. He went to his room and changed into the least down-ridden clothes he could find. Worn jeans, a faded shirt, and a hoodie that had clearly known better days. He looked at his reflection in the hallway mirror. A dull-eyed buck stared back at him, with chestnut fur that had lost every kind of shine. This attempt had to succeed, or it would cost him all will to live. Then again, if Azalea would catch him, his life would be over anyway. He went to her bedroom and searched for anything of value - money, a front door key, or the key to the stainless steel chastity cage he had worn for the past two years. All he came across was a small safe one typically finds in the closet of a hotel room. ‘That's probably where she keeps my ID as well, but what could the code be?’ he said to himself. He tried her birthday, then his birthday, then the day they met. None of those dates unlocked the safe. After the third attempt, the device beeped and the screen showed an error message. For the next two hours, all attempts to open the safe would be blocked. ‘I should have tried the date she locked me up,’ he muttered in defeat. ‘If I got to wait for this thing to give me another three attempts, I might as well stay here.’ Now was as good a time to leave as ever. He didn't own shoes anymore - he hadn't left the house for over a year - but he did still have a jacket. It was designed for late Spring and early Autumn, however, and it was almost Winter now. Still, with the wind and rain outside, it would be better than no coat. He carefully threaded his long ears through the holes in his hoodie. Some rabbits just put their ears down when they wore a hood, but Rowan was always annoyed by the loss of perception that came with tucking his ears. With one last look over his shoulder, he opened the door that lead to the balcony. Azalea never locked that door, because why would she? There was barbed wire on their sides of the stained glass panes that separated the balconies. He figured Azalea did want to prevent him from just climbing to their neighbor’s balcony, knocking, and leaving through their front door. His only option would be to drop down to the balcony of their downstairs neighbors, and surely, he would not do that. Would he? ‘Think again’, he said to himself, ignoring the cold raindrops that hit his face. He climbed over the railing and lowered himself as far as he could while hanging on to the bars. He grabbed the edge of the concrete and swung onto the balcony of their downstairs neighbors. The lights in that apartment were off, so he assumed nobody had seen him yet. One floor down, five more to go. With this rain, the chance of slipping gets higher every minute. The slightest mistake might kill me, he thought. Rowan looked around and wagered his options. There was a fire escape on the outside of the building, one balcony over to the side. If he could get around the stained glass pane that separated the balconies of the gallery, he could jump to the fire exit and climb down relatively safely. In the next apartment, however, the lights were on. He had to climb around the glass pane, hanging five stories up in the air, without attracting attention. The dire nature of the situation did not allow for hesitation. He climbed on top of the railing, quickly moved around the glass pane, and landed on the next balcony. Immediately, he let himself drop to the floor. For a few seconds, he listened tentatively, hoping there were no sudden sounds in the apartment of the neighbors he didn’t even know. There was no way he could explain his situation, or make up any other reasonable explanation as to how he ended up on someone else’s balcony, without carrying a key to his own front door. Seconds felt like minutes, and Rowan soon decided he had to continue. A five foot gap separated the side railing from the fire exit, a ladder surrounded by vertical metal bars. Rowan, being five foot six – not counting his ears – realized it would be a close call. The railing was too high to use as a stepping stone in his jump, and he couldn’t exactly try again. Instead, he climbed on the railing, stretched out his arms, bent his knees, and took a leap of faith. To Rowan, it felt like this jump would be decisive. Either he would make it and escape, or he would miss, drop five stories down, break his neck, and die. There was nothing in between. His hands made contact with the bars surrounding the fire exit, followed by his feet. Finally, the rest of his body crashed against the metal bars, absorbing the impact. His chastity cage ended up against one of the bars, sending a searing pain through his balls. It took all his effort to neither scream nor fall down. A few seconds later, Rowan felt his hands slip, and realized he had to climb down before gravity would do the job for him. Unfortunately, the bars fully encased the ladder, so he had to stay on the outside of the bars. He descended as fast as he could, slowly sliding down the wet metal. When he reached the lower end of the bars, he was still one story up in the air. The last part of the ladder could only be lowered from the inside, to prevent burglars from getting in. He had no other choice but to drop down and hope for the best. Unfortunately, "the best" wasn't what happened. An evening worth of rain had turned the pavement slippery. When Rowan landed on the sidewalk, he almost lost his balance. In a reflex, he put his weight on his left paw, which made him collapse in pain. He got up as fast as he could, to stay as relatively dry as possible. Every second mattered, especially in case Azalea's phone hadn't run out of battery yet. He had to get away as fast as he could first, then find a way to disable the tracking device. Rowan quickly looked around. The street was deserted, and he estimated nobody had seen him fall down. He limped, stumbled and practically hopscotched as fast as his uninjured paw would carry him, away from that dreaded street. A few minutes passed before he left the neighborhood, and half an hour later, he had fled the city. By now, his pants were drenched and his left paw hurt like hell. The road out of town soon traded plains for a forest, where Rowan had some shelter from the rain. Sparse streetlights allowed him to search for a sturdy branch he could support himself with, to minimize the amount of weight he needed to put on his injured paw. In the back of his mind, he constantly worried about the tracker. Only a few cars passed, but every time that happened, he was afraid Azalea was on his tail. Rowan had been walking down the side of the road for an hour now, during which the weather conditions had worsened. Even though he had some coverage from nearby trees, his coat didn’t provide much protection against the wind and the rain. The initial adrenaline of his escape had subsided, and Rowan could hardly ignore the dire circumstances he had ended up in. He was chilled to the bone, and would probably catch a cold if he stayed out in this weather. On top of that, exhaustion began to settle in. He would need to find a place to sleep or rest, or he might collapse. All Rowan could think about was to keep on walking. Every step he could put between himself and Azalea might be crucial. Just when his head started aching from the cold rain, he heard the sound of a car closing in. He turned to see if Azalea had finally caught up with him, but the big square headlights didn’t match the round-shaped city car she owned. Suddenly, the light became less intense and Rowan heard the car’s engine slow down. A sturdy all-terrain vehicle passed him and he saw the red brake lights as it stopped a few dozen yards in front of him. The driver then slowly backed up, until they stopped right next to Rowan. The right side window was rolled down, and a female voice called out to him. ‘Are you alright? Can I take you anywhere?’ ‘Anywhere would be fine, as long as it’s away from Hornet City.’ ‘In that case, get in.’ Rowan dropped the branch, opened the car door and heaved himself into the passenger seat. He couldn’t see the face of the driver clearly, but her hands on the wheel told him her fur was jet black. A golden ring on her right hand signified she was probably married. He had never seen this woman before, and he was fairly sure she wasn’t one of Azalea’s friends. ‘What were you doing out here, alone, in the rain?’ the woman said as she started driving. ‘Long story,’ Rowan said, trying to ignore his headache. ‘Do you mind if I tell you the short version?’ ‘Not at all.’ ‘Basically, I dated the wrong girl and it took me two years to draw the conclusion she treats me like a slave. I’m wearing a locked collar with a GPS tracker, and I’m terrified she knows where I am.’ ‘Why the tracker?’ ‘I’m not allowed to leave her apartment. I don’t even own a key to the front door.’ ‘Then how did you get out?’ ‘I climbed down on the outside of the fire escape. It went better than I expected, until I had to drop down the last floor. I hurt my paw in the process, and I’m not sure if it’s broken.’ Suddenly, the car slowed down. The woman carefully made a U-turn and began driving back towards the city. ‘What are you doing? You’re not bringing me back to Azalea, are you? I want out!’ ‘You want out? Back in the pouring rain?’ A flash of light struck in the distance, as if to answer the woman’s question. ‘Don’t be afraid. I’m only taking you to the hospital. If your paw is broken, you need medical attention.’ ‘But what about my collar? She’ll track me to the hospital, and knowing how manipulative Azalea can be, she’ll put up some sob story to get to me.’ ‘Then you’re going to explicitly tell the receptionist what you just said. I’ll stay with you the entire time.’ ‘Really? Why would you do that? You don’t even know me?’ ‘Because you need help, and if I were in your situation, I’d be desperate for someone kind enough to even notice me. Speaking of us being strangers, I’m Celester.’ ‘You can call me Rowan.’ ‘Alright. Were you planning on going anywhere specific before you hurt yourself?’ ‘Not really. Come to think of it, I was so focused on escaping, I didn’t even consider a place to sleep, or my next meal. What about you?’ ‘My mate and I recently bought a house outside of town, just on the other side of that small forest. I had an appointment earlier this evening that took a lot more of my time than I expected. Consider yourself lucky, Rowan. If everything went according to plan today, we never would’ve met.’ Celester chuckled. With that statement, the two fell into a comfortable silence. Rowan finally noticed the pleasant temperature in the car, in contrast to his cold wet clothes. His constant fear of Azalea being around every corner faded as his breathing slowly calmed down. They arrived at the hospital fifteen minutes later. Celester put the handbrake on the car and switched on the light at the rear view mirror. She instructed Rowan to sit still for a moment. For a while he could hear Celester mutter foul words under her breath, as she tinkered with his collar. In what felt like just a few seconds, they heard a soft metal click, after which Celester quickly removed the collar and switched the light off again. ‘How did you do that without a key?’ he asked, turning around. She showed him a pair of hair pins that had seen better days. ‘I picked the lock’. ‘Why do you even know how to do that?’ ‘Let’s say I used to be a troublemaker in my teenage years,’ she laughed. It was a quiet night at the emergency room, and they didn’t have to wait long before Rowan’s name was called. Celester wished him good luck and stayed in the waiting room. He returned a while later, wearing some kind of sleeve on his paw and supporting himself with a crutch. Celester stood at the receptionist’s desk, holding a small screwdriver, tinkering with Rowan’s newly removed collar. When she noticed him, she triumphantly held up a small black square object. ‘I took the battery pack out. If Azalea tracked your location, this is the last place she’ll be able to trace you to.’ She handed a small folded piece of paper to the fox behind the desk. ‘If a sandy furred rabbit doe by the name of Azalea Rosewood comes by asking for Mr. Buckthorn, would you be so kind as to give her this?’ The fox nodded. ‘Thank you, sir. Have a good evening.’ Celester offered her arm to help Rowan, and guided him to her car. Once they both sat in their seats again, the rabbit couldn’t suppress his curiosity. ‘What did you just hand over to that fox?’ ‘A note,’ she said, matter-of-factly. ‘I was referring to what’s on the note.’ ‘A goodbye to your ex-girlfriend. It says “Dear Azalea, fuck you very much. Kind regards, Rowan”.’
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