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First accident witnessed by wife/husband/partner


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I've been trying to think of a way of having a first "accident" in front of my wife, who has no idea about my love of wetting. I also don't have any feel for whether she could get into wetting fun.

I came up with a scenario to try. I could tie a ridiculously tight knot in the cord of my exercise pants and, when I get home one day busting to go, tell her I can't undo the knot and ask for her help. Before she has too much chance to undo the knot, I would pull away, saying "I can't hold it anymore" and either jump in the shower or sit on the toilet and flood my pants.

Question 1: Is this a good idea to "test the waters" and is a little bit of deception worthwhile? Or am I going down a wrong path?

Question 2: How did your wife/husband/partner discover your love of wetting?

I would love to hear your thoughts on both questions.

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@wetskipants I am currently in the same position as you.  I am interested and experimenting, but would like to inform her and then let her make her decision whether she wants to be part of it.  It’s just overcoming that nerve to ask.  I deal with “no” or “fuck off” on the daily being in sales, but this is someone I’m spending my life with; it’s someone I care about their opinion, likely the only opinion I care about.

Feel free to message me.  I’d love to get some more details on your relationship etc .

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5 hours ago, wetskipants said:

Question 1: Is this a good idea to "test the waters" and is a little bit of deception worthwhile? Or am I going down a wrong path?

Question 2: How did your wife/husband/partner discover your love of wetting?

1.) yes, you can test her. Your idea is not bad or you can go with your wife to the dinner, drink some drinks...and on the way home you can tell her that you need to hurry up, because you need to pee so much....and do not hold it at home

2.) I just told her about it

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2 minutes ago, AquaVitae said:

Nah. Would advise against. It's a decent idea for a new partner who is already open to kink related things but your wife is going to immediately suspect.

 

If you saw a stranger have an accident, your mind would fill in some gaps about why such an unlikely thing happened. But your wife knows you too well. At best she will be a little confused about exactly how you an adult male allowed this to happen. But lets say it ends there. Ok, so now youre going to tell her thats your fetish after the fact? Yeah your cover is immediately blown because as that point all the pieces come together.

Just talk to her.

Agreed here 100%.  My wife is very open and understanding about things, we have a talk it out relationship.  The issue for me is I have compartmentalized this for a long time, but would like to bring it up.  There are some things I have noted over the years that would either lead me to believe she would be ‘okay’ with me doing it, but may be intrigued too.  

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47 minutes ago, PrincessPeeach said:

FWIW, I’d sooner just have my husband tell me then to pretend to have an accident. 

Don't get me wrong, i fully understand how difficult it is to do that.  My husband basically forced me to tell him what I was doing on my phone one day, so I did. It took me like an hour to get it out, but he was actually pretty low key about it. He was like ‘that’s it?!?!’ lol. 

I think having an ‘accident’ might be alarming for your partner, especially if you’ve never been accident prone. 

It funny how I relate to this story....😉

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5 hours ago, PrincessPeeach said:

FWIW, I’d sooner just have my husband tell me then to pretend to have an accident. 

Don't get me wrong, i fully understand how difficult it is to do that.  My husband basically forced me to tell him what I was doing on my phone one day, so I did. It took me like an hour to get it out, but he was actually pretty low key about it. He was like ‘that’s it?!?!’ lol. 

I think having an ‘accident’ might be alarming for your partner, especially if you’ve never been accident prone. 

I think I understand what you were saying.  Somebody who knew you well might be suspicious if you had no history of being accident prone.  However it's also true that anyone can have an accident if they need the toilet badly and put off going for long enough.  Also even normally continent people can occasionally experience problems with control.  It's using the benefit of hindsight but I suspect the best thing is always to declare a bladder weakness (even if you don't actuaslly have one) at the beginning of a relationship, so that if a wetting happens it isn't too unexpected.  

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8 hours ago, PrincessPeeach said:

FWIW, I’d sooner just have my husband tell me then to pretend to have an accident. 

Don't get me wrong, i fully understand how difficult it is to do that.  My husband basically forced me to tell him what I was doing on my phone one day, so I did. It took me like an hour to get it out, but he was actually pretty low key about it. He was like ‘that’s it?!?!’ lol. 

I think having an ‘accident’ might be alarming for your partner, especially if you’ve never been accident prone. 

Thanks, Princess Peeach. What you say makes a lot of sense. 

Thanks, everyone. I've decided not to go ahead with the accident plan. Appreciate all of your thoughts. 

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16 hours ago, wetsalesman said:

How long have you two been together and did your interest pre date your marriage?  Feel free to Pm it not comfortable to answer here.

Of course, I did not tell her about my omo fetish on the first meeting or when we had a first sex. At the startof our relationship she lived in her appartment and I had my own appartment. But after 3 months we thought about to live together. So I told her about my fetish because I could not hide it longer- it is little bit suspiciously when you get laundry so often 🙂

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20 hours ago, Lukhas said:

Of course, I did not tell her about my omo fetish on the first meeting or when we had a first sex. At the startof our relationship she lived in her appartment and I had my own appartment. But after 3 months we thought about to live together. So I told her about my fetish because I could not hide it longer- it is little bit suspiciously when you get laundry so often 🙂

This is the way to do it! Just tell her upfront, but of course you choose time and place carefully. Remember that it is easier to talk if you are beside each other, eg in bed or sitting in a couch.

I know it’s difficult. It took me 13 years of marriage! But I have not regretted my decission a single second.

Now I wet my pants or bed whenever I want and is not judged for it. That’s freedom, and true love.

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20 hours ago, Helena said:

This is the way to do it! Just tell her upfront, but of course you choose time and place carefully. Remember that it is easier to talk if you are beside each other, eg in bed or sitting in a couch.

I know it’s difficult. It took me 13 years of marriage! But I have not regretted my decission a single second.

Now I wet my pants or bed whenever I want and is not judged for it. That’s freedom, and true love.

Just got to 11 years so maybe only two to go?!? Thanks for your comment. 

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  • 6 months later...

I'm not sure how long it took, maybe 3 or 4 years after we got married, and 6 years of dating prior to that.  She had something new she wanted to try and we talked about things.  That's when my like of wetting came out.  We made some plans on a weekend trip, to do a hold until you wet scenario in the car.  We packed plastic bags and towels to protect the car seats, and extra clothes.  We stopped in a park over looking on of the great lakes as a thunderstorm came up.  We were there between 15 and 20 minutes, during which time we both had wet our pants.  As it turns out, while she's not into it, she will at times play along with me, and I can wet myself anytime without being shamed for it.  

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I see you already decided not to stage an accident (you made the right choice, IMHO), but I figured I'd chime in anyway to say that if my partner had a kink they weren't sure I'd share, I would be 100% ok with discussing it like adults, and 100% Not Okay with them trying to sneakily try it out on me without asking. Involving me in a sexual situation without my prior knowledge and consent would be a serious betrayal of my trust - even if I had the same kink.

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To echo what has already been said, communication is key to healthy relationship. I told my now wife while we were still dating. I think it was still pretty early, before 6 months of dating at least. She has always been okay with it, early on she would tell me when she needed to pee and recounted the two accidents she could remember from her past. Over time, she let me start watching her pee in the shower, which is something she always did when she showered, not something she started just for me. Eventually, she wet herself for me and even let me video and post on this very site. Peeing and wetting do not turn her one at all but she is happy to do it for me and I am very thankful for that. She knows I like to wet myself as well but for now that aspect has not come up further.

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I've told every person I've ever dated about my fetish very early on. The moment things start taking a sexual turn in any of them, I'd let them know about it.  I NEVER had a single person tell me it was disgusting. I think I got maybe 1 hard no from a date, and that was the end of the relationship. It would never have worked anyways.

Always tell your partner upfront about your fetish if it is really important to you.

My better half always knows when I'm playing kinky games, She asks me why I'm being suspicious...

Funny thing. I have no problem with her catching me playing wetting or desperation games, but I'm super uncomfortable with her catching me watching porn or masturbating, even though she doesn't care....

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From a women’s perspective, honestly I respect a man who can just out right tell me what they want / like. 
I told my partner of 5 years, it took me about 2years or so and it was about a year after he’d actually experienced an accidental wetting when in a bar. He’s less on board than I’d like but willing to try things for my sake, which is reasonable. Although, I’m unsure regarding the future of the relationship sexually if he does give it a go and hates it. 

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On 4/14/2020 at 5:42 PM, wetpantsboy said:

She knows I like to wet myself as well but for now that aspect has not come up further.

Why not?

If you like it, you should be upfront to your wife that you wan´t to wet yourself when the urge hit. I´m pretty sure she will be fine with it, after what you describe above.

On 4/15/2020 at 1:30 AM, Anathema said:

My better half always knows when I'm playing kinky games, She asks me why I'm being suspicious...

Funny thing. I have no problem with her catching me playing wetting or desperation games, but I'm super uncomfortable with her catching me watching porn or masturbating, even though she doesn't care....

😄🥰 That´s true love! So cute!!

Please tell us more about your little games, and of course what happens when you are busted with wet pants! 😊
I love such romantic stories from every day life.

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57 minutes ago, Helena said:

Why not?

If you like it, you should be upfront to your wife that you wan´t to wet yourself when the urge hit. I´m pretty sure she will be fine with it, after what you describe above.

I do still wet myself from time to time, typically before showering. What I meant was we haven't discussed wetting together or her watching me wet myself. She wouldn't care that I do it alone.

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On 4/15/2020 at 1:30 AM, Anathema said:

I've told every person I've ever dated about my fetish very early on. The moment things start taking a sexual turn in any of them, I'd let them know about it.  I NEVER had a single person tell me it was disgusting. I think I got maybe 1 hard no from a date, and that was the end of the relationship. It would never have worked anyways.

Always tell your partner upfront about your fetish if it is really important to you.

My better half always knows when I'm playing kinky games, She asks me why I'm being suspicious...

Funny thing. I have no problem with her catching me playing wetting or desperation games, but I'm super uncomfortable with her catching me watching porn or masturbating, even though she doesn't care....

Exactly the same here. After gaining experiance in different relationships and seeing that my kinks do not just disapear, I do tell a new partner quite early about what I like. If it is important for You, there is no reason to hide it.

But as Helena already said , chosse the time and place when to tell. Especially if You are to tell it to a female partner.

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