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background: a girl called Stephanie has struggled with a weak bladder and frequently worries about accidents. now it's the summer before high school she has begged her parents to enrol her in a summer camp designed to help girls like her who have trouble holding their pee and her parents have agreed  

 

Stephanie has only just arrived at the camp and already she has high hopes for the future no longer will she constantly have to think about where he closest toilet is. she is greeted outside by camp counceller jannet who leads her on a tour through the camp showing her the cabins and letting her put her stuff down and showing her the shower block which also had the only available camper toilets (there were only 2 for the entire 50 campers to use for 2 weeks ) 

once the tour was concluded she was brought back to her cabin to meet her group of 4 other girls (the camp had 10 groups of 5 ) 

the girl introduced themselves as Emily a short brown haired girl,Scarlett a tall blonde girl with heavy make up for a girl not even in high school, Jamie a black haired average sized quiet girl and kacey who looked and dressed like a goth girl. the girls had little time for introductions as the girls had to go with their group leader Janet for their first challenge which was  a simple pee holding contest to see what the counceller was dealing with as the girls went to meet their counceller they saw other groups of girls going to meet their counceller the girls met up with Janet and were each given three 500ml bottles of water to drink each and after all three bottles were drank all 5 of the girls were starting to feel it's effect on their bladders and Emily and Stephanie were already squirming around which Janet took note on after half an hour all 5 of the girls were squirming with there legs crossed and Stephanie had her hands dug in her crotch all were also looking visibly distressed as neither wanted to be first one to wet themselves after another 5 minutes a 3 second hissing could be heard and Janet looked around to see who leaked she then her another spurt being released but from another direction and as if on queue all 5 of the girls started to wet themselves and Janet saw all their leggings darken and they algae sighs and moans of relief as they soaked their lower half the last girl finished peeing after 1 minute all the girls were shocked after all peeing themselves and Janet sent them to the showers and to get new clothes all 5 girls trodded to the showers with kacey dashing into a toilet stall due to the weakness of her holding muscles and the   sheer amount of liquid she drank she released another strong 30 second stream from her tired holding muscles and then joined the others in showering all the girls then went to their cabins as it  was now free time none of them mentioned the contest they only knew it would be a hard 2 weeks  

end of part 1

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This is a really cool idea and I'd love to see what you can do with it, but the structure of this was almost impossible to understand let alone enjoy. It badly needs paragraph breaks and better punctuation. They let you pace the story rather than just rapid-firing ideas at us in a big block. Even at a special pee-holding camp, you went from drinking water to everyone wetting in like 4 lines. We don't even know these girls yet! Let them interact a bit and show us their personality. Certainly they each have stories about how they ended up at a camp for weak-bladdered girls, and none of them except for Stephanie seem to have any feelings about the experience so far.

Organizing a story to make it entertaining is hard work. But with enough love, I'm certain this premise is a winner. 🙂

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Completely echo what @AliasnameTO said above. The premise is great, and I'm sure a fantastic story could be built around it.

I'm probably the least qualified to critique on here, having started my first piece of fiction a week ago after not writing for something daft like 20 years. But here's my thoughts, purely from a readers perspective. 

There's no reason you can't jump straight in with the Omo to create some dramatic effect, with the descriptive stuff following a short distance behind to pad things out a bit if that's the way you fancy running it, after all it's your story, but a little more structure would help with the readability and probably the engagement from readers.

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 part 2 

day 3 

Over the last day Stephanie had the time to learn more about her cabin mates and why they decided to attend camp. Emily had decided to go after an embarrassing accident in school,Scarlett had doubts about her holding ability and thought she could test it hear, kacey did pee holding contest at home with her friends and wanted to get an edge over them  and as for Jamie she thought this would help her hold her pee on family road trips as she hated having to pee in bottles or on the side of the road. 

yesterday consisted of their counceller teaching them methods on how to hold their pee which lead to another holding contest though instead of having to pee themselves they were made to hold for a set amount of time and then told to try and make it to the bathroom though since every group did it at the same time they knew the bathroom would be crowded so 4 of them just ran to the bushes and pee'd there with Jamie bolting to the toilet she made it but she had a small wet spot on her leggings. 

Stephanie woke up on the third day to find her cabin empty she was a heavy sleeper and it was still before the earliest wake up time so she figured the rest of her group was already up. this was confirmed when kacey walked into the room and told her the rest of the girls were queing for the showers and told her to get moving. 

When she got up she noticed she had to pee quote badly as they had stayed up late talking amongst each other and had some sugary drinks each girl had brought from home and it filled her bladder over night she quickly got up grabbed a towel and fresh clothes and followed kacey to the shower and toilets when she got there she saw a line of about 20 girls for the toilet and anothe 15 for the shower cubicles sure she could go in the smaller line and pee in the shower  it there no way she could wait in that either. kacey saw the look on her face and said "you need to pee?" Stephanie nodded "badly and I can't wait in either line"  kacey thought for a second and said "come with me I know a secluded spot u can pee in it's what I did yesterday I always just find a bush to pee in when I can't wait " kacey left the block and Stephanie followed behind her. 

she was lead to a secluded area at the back of the camp kacey looked arou d and said "go here I'll keep watch" Stephanie listened and lowered her trousers and panties before lowering into a squatting position at a tree after a small sigh a thick stream exited her urethra and splattered onto the dirt at her feet she sighed in relief as she kept peeing and prayed no be would come along. her stream started to slow after 30 seconds and stopped after 45 though she continued to sit there for a bit letting her urethra dry off so no evidence would be left when she came back out to see kacey she said "you need to go get showered now and meet us in the mess hall" Stephanie nodded and headed for the shower block. 

When Stephanie arrived at the mess hall she noticed her group sitting at a table together in which after getting some food promptly joined them. she sat at the table to see her group greet her whilst she ate she noticed Scarlett and Jamie moving around a bit while they spoke but she thought nothing of it . eventually Scarlett spoke up and said" I gotta run to the bathroom " Jamie followed up with "I gotta go too " they watched the girls go to the door only to be turned away by thecouncrllr who was standing by it. the girls sat back at the table and Scarlett said " they said nobody leave until breakfast finishes in 30 minutes. Stephanie then said it's alright u can hold it" Jamie said " no u don't get we are both bursting we haven't been since 7 pm yesterday" all the girls looked panicked apart from kacey who handed them her empty coffee thermos and told them "here use this" Jamie looked at her in shock and said "I'm not using that the reason I came here is so I won't need to do stuff like this" Scarlett simply looked at the thermos for a minute and said "uhh fine but only cause I'm wearing a skirt it should be easier to not be noticed tell me if someone notices" the girls nodded their heads. 

Scarlett then opens the thermos and puts in under the table as Emily sees her home her skirt up and lower her panties to her shins she then shifts forward and positions the thermos at her pee hole the girls then hear a quiet psssss 

along with a quiet ahhhh coming from Scarlett as Jamie tries to block it out as she makes sure no one's sees Scarlett. her stream continues for longer than usual as she had to keep it quiet and in that time Jamie had her hands in her crotch and was breathing heavily trying to if back the flow of urine trapped inside her. after 1 and a half minutes Scarlett stream suffices and she looks on the thermos and rd Jamie "if you wanted to go u can't now it's all full she then screwed the lid on and told kacey she'd wash it out and give it back to which she agreed. 

Emily looked over at Jamie and said "Will u be able to hold it for 20 minutes" she replied with "I don't know" 

Emily then had a crazy idea though she wasn't sure how Jamie would respond "okay Jamie none have the counceller have know were sitting here as they have not looked at us or came over here and u clearly won't make it till the end of breakfast maybe you could just pee on the floor" the look she gave Emily was in describeable " are u nuts what happens if someone finds out I'll get kicked out " Emily replied with "well it's better than everyone seeing you pee it pants and u cod just squat behind the table no one will see u our table doesn't face anywhere" Jamie just sat there continuing to think and then said "fine but just because I'm desperate " Jamie slowly got up from her seat but as she did asmall spurt escaped her urethra and sprayed her white panties she helped and increased the grip on her crotch before seeing something in the distance a closet with a window at that was possible to pee out of and the window was definitely openable she darted towards the closet losing spurts of piss as she did she ran in the closet and shut the door behind her she got her leggings and panties down to her knees and forced the window open she stuck her crotch out the window and then let her stream release out of poor strained bladder as a torrent came out of her and splattered on to the grass below as her piss exited her she moaned in relief as she looked down to see it was forming a puddle o a patch of grass below. it went on for longer than she expected at 30 seconds it was still going strong she thought to herself how much was she holding. her stream cut off at the 1 minute 15 mark and she took a moment to inspect the damage her panties were soaked but none had gone to her leggings. she pulled her panties and leggings up and exited the closet relieved to find that no one else had seen her go in. 

she sat back at her table and continued eating her toast as kacey said "did u pee in the closet " Jamie looked at her and said "no I pee d out the window " all the girls gasped and kacey said "said even I haven't done that before that one's new" the girls continued to talk over the next 15 minutes before the end of breakfast and once it ended headed to meet their counceller for their second activity. 

end of part 2 

 

next part will feature Emily and kacey desperate to pee

I hope I improved on the first part as I can admit that wasn't my best work. and also if anyone looking for male desperation wants to make a male version of this I encourage  it's just male desperation doesn't do much for me so it isn't something I'd write

 

Edited by Joey1234 (see edit history)
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On 7/20/2019 at 8:37 PM, AliasnameTO said:

This is a really cool idea and I'd love to see what you can do with it, but the structure of this was almost impossible to understand let alone enjoy. It badly needs paragraph breaks and better punctuation. They let you pace the story rather than just rapid-firing ideas at us in a big block. Even at a special pee-holding camp, you went from drinking water to everyone wetting in like 4 lines. We don't even know these girls yet! Let them interact a bit and show us their personality. Certainly they each have stories about how they ended up at a camp for weak-bladdered girls, and none of them except for Stephanie seem to have any feelings about the experience so far.

Organizing a story to make it entertaining is hard work. But with enough love, I'm certain this premise is a winner. 🙂

I can definitely admit part 1 wasn't my best work it was just something I drummed up quickly instead of putting in time and effort and I hope I improved with part 2 

Edited by Joey1234 (see edit history)
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part 3 

day 5 

the last few days at the cap had gotten much tougher the holds had gotten longer and the bathroom would sometime randomly be locked though that wasn't a problem for kacey who usually just pissed behind a bush and to be fair so did the other girls but only in the most extreme circumstances even Jamie had started to pee outside more often though it was clear she didn't like it and none of the ever had to piss in a thermos or out a window but overall the girls still enjoyed the camp and all their average hold times had gone up and they all felt more confident in how long they could hold. 

it was late at night on the 5th day and all5 of the were up in their cabin talking and getting to know each other. 

"okay girls here is a good question. where's the weirdest place you've pee d " it kacey who said this and the other girls just gave her this look the said typical. "okay kacey you start" Emily said. kacey nodded "okay so one time I had to pee in a thermos during a school overnight trip on a bus. I woke up in the midde of th night absolutely bursting for a piss and I had already leaked a bit in my pants. so what I did was grabbed a thermos that was full of coffee,probably the reason I had to pee so badly so i snuck few rows behind where no one was sitting across from me and I was wearing a skirt so it was easy to just shift forward move my underwear to the side and just pee in the thermos the hardest part was keeping it quiet as I was just so desperate it hurt trying not to pee full force."  

"okay I've told my story who's next?"  "I'll go next" Emily replied "okay so one time after going home from school and I was bursting for a pee but sadly my parents weren't home and my front and back door was locked the only thing open was the gate to the back garden and once I leaked in my pants I knew it was now or never and I had to pee in my parents watering can and the weirdest thing is my parents never found out even when they had to water the plants" 

"ill go next" Jamie exclaimed but not very eager "one time I had to pee in a folded up towel during a car trip  I remember having to pull my leggings and panties down whilst my sister sat next to me whilst I told her not to look and I remember how good it felt to finally release all that trapped up urine I was lucky the towel contained it all" "Scarlett you want to go next" Jamie said looking at her "okay I guess. so one time I had to pee in the sink at school the line was super long and I had already started to pee a bit in my pants before i could hoist myself over the sink the craziest thing was that other girls saw what I was doing and joined me which made me feel even more awkward listening to everyone else pee at full force the other girls weren't even trying to hide that they enjoyed and our school had a problem with girls peeing in the single years after it was their own fault though the school doesnt  have enough toilets." kacey turned to Steph is and said "okay your turn" 

Stephanie thought for a minute and said "okay so one time I had to pee in a bbucket for multiple times a day whilst our toilet was being fixed that was pretty bad." 

"Christ all this talk of peeing has made me notice how quick that coffee went through me" kacey said digging a hand in her crotch "we warned you about drinking all that coffee" Scarlett replied. kacey didn't reply as she bolted to the door only for it not to budge. kacey looks panicked and said "damn they must have locked the door they did say they would be cutting down on bathroom breaks" the girls then heard  psss and a help from kacey as she shoved her other hand in her crotch and doubled over she could feel her bladder burning and desperate for release they heard a longer spurt escaped kaceys pee hole along with another yelp from kacey who was shaking from how desperate and finally her floodgates burst open and a torrent of piss escaped her urethra at full force and sprayed into her pyjamas and eventually reached the floor and formed a yellow puddle on the floor.the other girls looked on in horror as her puddle grew and her stream continued going full force at 45 seconds and finally sufficed at 1minute 30 seconds. 

kacey looked in horror at her puddle her pyjamas and panties were ruined and all she could do was cry as this was the first time she had actually pee d herself as whenever she was critical there was always a bush or a tree to pee behind but lucky for her her cabin mates started to comfort her and got her some fresh clothes  

end of part  3

next part will definitely have Emily desperate for sure 

 

 

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part 4 

day 7 

it was now a week since the girls had arrived at camp and they had started and they started to become good friends and on top of that their holding ability had increased drastically as they have been able to continually hold it during challenges and meals in which they were not allowed to use the bathroom  and they also had to pee in the bushes less often as they were always able to holding until a stall was available even kacey who was always the first to walk out and go behind a tree had started to just wait it out in line but there was still times when the girls would struggle to make it and also times when they just had to pop a squat showing that they weren't yet expert holders  

it  was just after breakfast and the last 4 of the50 girls had started to trek out of the mess hall (kacey had ran ahead for some reason probably needed a wee) and the girls went to meet their counceller as they were first up for challenges. 

Emily stayed back and said to her friends "I'll catch up I gotta pee first " her friends told her to her to be quick as they couldn't be late. Emily jogged to the toilet block normally she wouldn't ever have to pee after breakfast but she had started drinking coffee with her breakfast only to find it kinda went right through her. she went into the toilet block only to see practically every girl waiting in a massive  line  and could clearly hear there streams hitting the toilet bowl. she heard one flush and saw kacey walk out " Oh hey Emily you need to pee too" Emily just decided to go when she had the chance "oh no the other girls just asked me to see if I were done" both girls exited the block with Emily looking back on it. 

soon the two girls met up with the others who had already met up with their counceller . each girl was given three items a bottle of water which they were told to drink right there,something to pit round their wrist which they were told was a tracker which could only be removed by a key thecounceller had and a map of the which had a mark saying restroom. Janet then explained the challenge "this challenge will test how able you girls are at finding a toilet with a map" as we said this four other councellers marched over to them "You will each be taken to a random point in the forest track each an equal distance away from the toilet the point you will start at is marked on each of your maps and when you reach your start point you will be given a compass and told to wait 5 minutes before walking. as for anyone who thinks they could just piss in a bush the tracker can also tell if you are currently peeing also to make the challenge more difficult the water you girls just drank was laced with dieturic" Emily gasped at this revelation.she had already needed to pee but hearing of the dieturic was nuts in fact she could already feel herneed increasing and she had seen how desperate they could make a personas her sister had took one to clear out an infection which made it harder for her to pee. 

Emily and rest of the girls were lead off by their counceller with Emily taki g a glance at the bathroom before they were fully in the woods.  when she arrived at her starting location she was given compass by the counceller and reminded to wait 5 minutes before setting off 

those five minutes before setting off were when it really started to get serious that bottle was starting to work its way down and the dieturic was making it even worse as she had to cross her legs whilst standing though she was still determined to make it and as she was wearing a skirt it would be easy to just remove her pants when she got to the bathroom. before her tracker heaped indicating she could make her way she determined the bathroom was South East of where she was and she determined she should just go off the path it's be quicker that way. 

the walk towards the bathroom was hellish as she had to stop every few minutes to regain control it felt like she was going to burst at any moment it reminded her of a school hiking trip when she tried to only pee when she was absolutely bursting as she hated peeing outdoors though she didn't wet herself that day she soaked 2 pairs of panties and nearly leaked into her leggings and o nthe second day one of her friends had to help her into the  bushes as she couldn't walk right and later she had to pee on the path as she couldn't move and her friends wasn't carrying her luckily her group were the furthest behind. Emily didn't know why she was thinking  about this as it wasn't helping her aching bladder at all this showed when a 3 second trickle escaped her urethra and she had to jam both her hands in to cut it off, her urethra burned due to her stream cutting off as it desperately needed relief it took her a bit to regain control  but once she did she kept walking. 

after a few minutes of walking she leaked again this time causing it to drop off her panties and onto the grass oh what she wouldn't give to just drop her panties and release her trapped urine all over the dirt she looked up only to see  a sight she had been waiting for all day the bathroom she had been searching for with kacey and Jamie standing outside they didn't look desperate so it must be open. Emily bolted to the toilet constantly losing drops and leaving a small trail of urine behind her she grabbed the handl and shook wildly only for it not to open she turned to kacey and shouted "who's  in there"  she replied with "Stephanie and she got in but I know a way you  can pee I did it when Jamie was in there. see the trackers aren't trackers they just detect if you're peeing inacertainarea and that area is larger than just the bathroom I learnt this from my older sites who was here a few years ago just pee behind the bathroom" Emily didn't know if this was false and she diidnt care she just ran behind the toilet and didn't even bother squatting she just raised  her skirt moved her underwear to the side and with a sigh a torrent of pee exited her urethra and sprayed all over the wall and dirt she looked down at her torrent of piss and admired how much urine she held but she also saw the damage to her pants in short they were soaked she would have to change them when got back to the cabin. her stream was so loud it could be heard by Stephanie inside the toilet "has someone pee'd themselves" she asked kacey just said "I'll explain later" it was about 30 seconds into her piss when she saw Scarlett run right next to her who was also wearing a skirt lift it up move her pants to side and start spraying the same wall right next to her. she turned to Emily and said "I'm so sorry I just couldn't hold it any longold she responded with "it's okay" at 45 seconds of Emily peeing with no sign of her stream slowing down she heard the toilet flush and the fire open both girlscould hear footsteps overteir loud streams they saw Stephanie com round "What's going on here. oh sorry " as she jolted back round to where kacey and Jamie were Emily's stream finally slowed down at around a minute 30 and finally stopped after almost 2 minute. she put her panties back in place and headed back to the other girls with Scarlett still peeing wildly. she came back round after 30 seconds after Emily going back. 

not 5 minutes later they saw their counceller coming towards . Emily, Scarlett and kacey expected to be scolded for behind the toilet but instead all girls were congratulated for pee so.g in the right area and were all lead back to camp and allowed to change out of any cloths that may have gotten wet  

end of part 4 

and also I've been thinking of making a spin-off about one of the other girls in the group which one  would u like to see 

 

 

 

 

Edited by Joey1234 (see edit history)
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part 5 day 11 

So far it had been business as usual with no special challenges so far but one thing for sure is that all the pee holding was starting to have a positive effect even though 2 of the girls couldn't wait to use the toilet and had to piss round the back of the block the girls holding ability was still better than ever at the start of the camp a couple of girls had wet themselves  bit all that had stopped and to add to that more girls were willing to wait in the bathroom line than just pee behind a bush all 50 of the girls were rapidly improving but issues still arose now and again. 

it was about 1pm on the 11th day and kacey was making her way to the toilet block. since she never pee d before or after breakfast she hasn't had a chance to go all day and the coffee with her breakfast wasn't helping she thought to herself "man why do I even still drink so much coffee it just go's right through me" she turns a corner to see the toilet block but also Stephanie outside jiggling the handle. she went over her and said "they must've locked it I mean they did say it would be randomly locked sometimes" Stephanie looked a bit surprised when she appeared out of nowhere but agreed "probably. let's just go to lunch I barely need to go anyway" Stephanie walked of to the mess hall hall and kacey followed her in truth she barely had to go she just liked to go when she got a chance as it could at anytime be randomly locked. 

When the girls got to the mess hall the doors were locked behind them as was usual at this point and they took their seats with their friends. after 15 minutes food was made available and when given the offer of coffee kacey declined it as it wouldn't help her bladder which was slowly sending out slightly stronger messages that it needed release instead she just had water as she had found it made her the least desperate. lunch went on as normal apart from the odd leg cross from kacey who was starting to regret not just going in a bush as the morning coffee was still going down to her bladder along with some fruit juice she had afterwards. 

while kacey was focusing on her food and her bladder she failed to notice that Stephanie was facing her own difficulties with her bladder. in truth she and lied about how desperate she was outside the toilet block in truth she already had to go quite badly when kacey went round and the fruit juice she had with her lunch wasn't helping as she had had her legs firmly crossed for 5 minutes and unlike the first time one of them had been desperate at meal times there was no thermos to relieve herself into and there was a counceller in front of the closet so that idea was out so at this point she had no options but to wait. 

20 minutes went by and at this point Stephanie was seriously struggling and kacey was at the point of having firmly crossed legs and the craziest part was no one noticed Stephanie intense shifting or kacey crossed legs all 5 were just talking  amongst each other whilst waiting for lunch to end. 

soon an anoucement was given to say that lunch would end in 10 minutes and the sheer shock of someone suddenly shouting caused a small spurt of piss to escape Stephanie urethra and spray her black panties this caused her to shove both hands in her crotch to stop the impending flood from escaping and soaking her panties and leggings at this point kacey was at a point of having one hand dug in her crotch and biting her bottom lip she looked down to see her poor overflowed bladder had started to bulge out which would be noticeable if she stood up she decided she would just make a run for the bathroom without saying anything to her friends. 

as the end of lunch came and the doors were unlocked both Stephanie and kacey ran out of their seats and  bolted out the door but since Stephanie was much faster than kacey she made it to the bathroom first she ran in to see one stall was out of order before running in to the one closest to her she slammed the door shut and locked it before she could get her leggings off a continuous stream left her bladder and sat in her pants and leggings before she got them off luckily she was sat down on the toilet before it could run down her legs she sighed as her stream turned into a torrent echoing throughout the bathroom as it splattered into the toilet  bowl. 

When kacey ran in the bathroom she almost cried seeing the other stall was out of order as she leaked against the wall handed jammed in crotch she looked over at the sink and realised it would fit her ass meaning she could pee in there. she quickly got her leggings and panties down and hoisted herself on the nearest sink and with a sigh a torrent simply erupted from her urethra but Stephanie did not hear that her friends was pissing in the sink as kacey load of piss exited her she stared up at the ceiling puffing and panting her stream still going strong. What she didn't think about was that Stephanie would probably see her as after 1 and a half minutes she was exiting the stall relieved from the pee trapped inside and when she saw her friend power pissing into the sink she was so shocked she couldn't say anything and kacey said nothing either so all Stephanie did was go to the sink furthest away from kacey and wash her hands and by the time she was done with that kacey was all finished and was starting to wash her hands and said to her "I'm sorry I couldn't hold it" Stephanie replied with "it's honestly alright " as she waited for her to finish and went to meet the other 3 girls. 

end of part 5 

part 6 will definitely be the final part but I might make season 2 if I can come up with original ideas 

 

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part 6 finale  

day 14 

it was now the final day at cap and all girls holding ability had been more than double what it was when she first arrived and all girls were proud of that bit there was still times when they'd struggle 

it was now breakfast in the camp and it was about to end one thing was unsure though the girls knew there would be one final test before the end of camp and none of the girls knew what it would be that was until the head counceller made an announcement "ahem a strong fast acting dieturic has been added to all of your drinks your goal is to make it to the bathroom time without wetting it should be taking effect now" after saying this all the girls in the cafeteria tense as their bladders suddenly fill at a rate faster than the knew was possible the counceller then added that they were making sure no one would sneak off to the bushes the doors were soon opened and 50 girls made a run for the bathroom with their hands in their crotches apart who Scarlett who tripped and fell over and ended up at the back of the line. 

Scarlett looked in horror as she saw the line of 49 girls struggling to contain their bursting bladders and she was t the end of it. 

Scarlett stood in the line as t what seems like a smile place girls went in and out 2 at a time Scarlett looks down at her waist to see her bladder visibly bulging out of her and she slowly stroked her now aching bladder while keeping the other hand in her crotch that was until her bladder spasmed and caused her to leak a bit in her skirt which made her shove another hand in their as well. 

as the line dragged on she saw the rest of her group entering the cabin looking as if they had already gone and were going to pack up Scarlett envied their empty bladders as her begged for sweet release. 

after what seems like forever and a few more leaks the last two girls exited the stall and Scarlett pushed past them and ran into the first empty stall and was able to remove her leggings and soaked panties and whilst squatting over it without sitting released a torrent of trapped urine into the toilet causing her to moan continuously though since she wasn't sitting and her aim wasn't very good some of it splattered on the stall floor . When her stream finished she couldn't believe how good it felt and she didn't even know how long showed she just ran out to her cabin to  say goodbye to her friends and the camp 

the end  

I might make  story about another group of girls if I get more ideas but in the mean time you could read my spin-off about kacey 

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