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Fetish and privacy how much are you concerend, what do you do?


Fetish and privacy  

42 members have voted

  1. 1. How much are you concerned about your privacy, especially on your fetish side?

    • Completely
      10
    • Much
      12
    • Kinda
      11
    • a bit
      5
    • not at all
      4
  2. 2. How much do you do for privacy?

    • Second OS
      3
    • privacy friendly OS
      5
    • privacy friendly browser (for example with noscript)
      13
    • second browser (also TOR)
      11
    • VPN or TOR
      6
    • nothing
      16
    • changing Windows settings
      4


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If you asked me about this three years ago, I would have told you that I wasn't very concerned about privacy.  While there are definitely people that I don't want to know about my fetish, I didn't expect that anyone would go looking through my stuff trying to uncover if I had any secret kink.  I have some friends who know what I'm into, and I would allow them to freely use my computer when they came over.  I had nothing to hide from these people.  As far as using VPN or TOR, I saw no reason to- I wasn't visiting any sites that were legally questionable, so I had no reason to hide what I was doing.  People who used these services, I figured, we either just overly paranoid or involved with things that were legally questionable.

Then, a couple  years ago, everything changed.  Computer security is now a primary concern with me.  I found myself caught up in a police investigation regarding child pornography.  As far as I can figure, the most likely thing that happened was that someone nearby was sending or downloading a picture when their device momentarily pinged my wifi.  That was all it took for the cops to get a search warrant, burst into my home, and take every single computer, phone, or anything else capable of storing data.

Now, they did eventually give it all back when they couldn't find any evidence that I had anything to do with what they were investigating, but it took nearly two years for them to return everything they seized.  Meanwhile, I had to explain every website I had ever visited, explain how ABDL is not related to pedophilia, be interrogated about stories on this very site involving childhood memories, stories that I did not write or had even read, but existed.  The fact that my girlfriend had ordered a children's book online as a Christmas gift for her young cousin was something I was interrogated about.

I had to explain my fetish and intimate details of my relationship to multiple police officers and lawyers, sometimes in a court setting while attempting to get my property back, where everything was recorded and is now a matter of public record.

I never want to go through anything like that ever again, and the only real way anyone has to protect themselves against this kind of thing is to be incredibly secure in everything they do.  I am not going to go into detail about everything I do to protect myself here, as the steps I take are quite thorough.

25 minutes ago, Tailsuser said:

I am curious about what you are doing for your online privacy, especially while visiting pages like this. Personally I do not use TOR right now, but a VPN, also I use a second browser on a Ubuntu machine.

Tor was really designed for a state level adversary, but isn't completely effective in that a state level adversary could take control of a TOR exit node and use that to get back to you via traffic analysis.  TOR is only effective if the exit node has not been compromised, and there can be no way to know that.

VPN can be a good option, bit it is only as good as the VPN service you are using.  A VPN service can  mask your IP from the sites you visit, but if you are dealing with a legal adversary they are going to have additional tools at their disposal to look past your VPN.  Traffic analysis can reveal a VPN user.  Also, it is important to go with a "no log"
VPN service, otherwise if those logs are compromised your real IP could be discovered.  Just because a VPN company claims to be "no log" does mean it is true.  They might delete server logs, but if they enforce any kind of bandwidth or connection limitations, there is no way to do that without some kind of log information.  Then there is also the matter of customer account and payment info and how that may relate to usage data.  Also, even with proper "no log" VPN services that do protect your data, how often are they clearing their server logs?  Is it every hour? Minute? Day? Month?  And are they clearing these logs in a way that can not be recovered.

Then there is the issue of hardware MAC addresses.  These belong to the network adapter on your computer, and will always be the same, regardless of what OS you are using.  Your MAC address isn't visible to sites your visit, but it is visible to your router.  Your router may log network traffic, at least for a period of time, associated with device specific MAC addresses.  This information could be visible to an adversary if your router was ever to be compromised.  Some ISP's, however, will also collect and store this information from your router, so even clearing the info off your router itself doesn't stop your ISP from having it.

Clearing your browser history, or browsing in private mode, also doesn't do that much if you are up against a technically sophisticated adversary who has access to your computer.  Your computer will keep a local DNS cache that will show your entire browsing history, no matter what you do with your browser or  what mode you browse in.  Windows users can see this by going to the command prompt and typing "ipconfig /displaydns"

Finally, there is always the danger that you think you have everything configured correctly and you have a leak somewhere.  A site like 'Do I Leak' can help you identify some of these leaks.  But, just because you aren't leaking right now, doesn't mean you won't.  If your firewall or VPN software halts unexpectedly, you could leak information without realizing it.

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6 minutes ago, TVGuy said:

Tor was really designed for a state level adversary, but isn't completely effective in that a state level adversary could take control of a TOR exit node and use that to get back to you via traffic analysis.  TOR is only effective if the exit node has not been compromised, and there can be no way to know that.

Yes, this is correct. But as far as I know exit nodes can just identify you if they do know who is coming from the other onion "rings". Also if you live f. e. in the US, taking an Russian exit node will probably protect you better.

 

7 minutes ago, TVGuy said:

VPN can be a good option, bit it is only as good as the VPN service you are using.  A VPN service can  mask your IP from the sites you visit, but if you are dealing with a legal adversary they are going to have additional tools at their disposal to look past your VPN.  Traffic analysis can reveal a VPN user.  Also, it is important to go with a "no log"
VPN service, otherwise if those logs are compromised your real IP could be discovered.  Just because a VPN company claims to be "no log" does mean it is true.  They might delete server logs, but if they enforce any kind of bandwidth or connection limitations, there is no way to do that without some kind of log information.  Then there is also the matter of customer account and payment info and how that may relate to usage data.  Also, even with proper "no log" VPN services that do protect your data, how often are they clearing their server logs?  Is it every hour? Minute? Day? Month?  And are they clearing these logs in a way that can not be recovered.

Using crypto currencies online helps, if you can use them anonymously, that is usually done through some kind of money laundering, you might argue that this is not completely legal, though. The bigger problem is that they also know your IP Address, as your real IP, also if you are not using openVPN they probably have a client on your PC, which is not quite... Good? But it would be wise anyway to not choose a VPN provider in your country. Panama is quite popular at providers, also Switzerland. Basically you have to trust whoever you are using the VPN from, some do use TOR in front of it.

 

14 minutes ago, TVGuy said:

Then there is the issue of hardware MAC addresses.  These belong to the network adapter on your computer, and will always be the same, regardless of what OS you are using.  Your MAC address isn't visible to sites your visit, but it is visible to your router.  Your router may log network traffic, at least for a period of time, associated with device specific MAC addresses.  This information could be visible to an adversary if your router was ever to be compromised.  Some ISP's, however, will also collect and store this information from your router, so even clearing the info off your router itself doesn't stop your ISP from having it.

The MAC address. Yes, that is not good. But spoofing can help as you can actually spoof it. When it comes to routing your traffic, one might want to use his own router which does not store the traffic information. But if you are using a local client you will not lose too much of information to it, maybe revealing your IP, that might be counterproductive, but your ISP does know this, either. I consider the greater risk is to use the right DNS server, however. If you are in a virtual private network, you should usually use the DNS server of this, but when I tried openVPN once I figured out that this does not work always, "Do I leak" comes handy here. Funny name, btw. What you can do against this is just setting your DNS server to 1.1.1.1, if you trust those guys, I personally think this is at least better than your ISP who even needs to log in some states.

 

21 minutes ago, TVGuy said:

Clearing your browser history, or browsing in private mode, also doesn't do that much if you are up against a technically sophisticated adversary who has access to your computer.  Your computer will keep a local DNS cache that will show your entire browsing history, no matter what you do with your browser or  what mode you browse in.  Windows users can see this by going to the command prompt and typing "ipconfig /displaydns"

This is something I have actually not heard of. Gotta find out how to delete this on my Ubuntu machine, using Windows for this is something that would never come to my mind. And as I found out Unix systems don't have this. That comes handy.

Thank you for your advice, I appreciated it.

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On 5/7/2018 at 12:25 PM, Tailsuser said:

Yes, this is correct. But as far as I know exit nodes can just identify you if they do know who is coming from the other onion "rings". Also if you live f. e. in the US, taking an Russian exit node will probably protect you better.

 

Using crypto currencies online helps, if you can use them anonymously, that is usually done through some kind of money laundering, you might argue that this is not completely legal, though. The bigger problem is that they also know your IP Address, as your real IP, also if you are not using openVPN they probably have a client on your PC, which is not quite... Good? But it would be wise anyway to not choose a VPN provider in your country. Panama is quite popular at providers, also Switzerland. Basically you have to trust whoever you are using the VPN from, some do use TOR in front of it.

 

The MAC address. Yes, that is not good. But spoofing can help as you can actually spoof it. When it comes to routing your traffic, one might want to use his own router which does not store the traffic information. But if you are using a local client you will not lose too much of information to it, maybe revealing your IP, that might be counterproductive, but your ISP does know this, either. I consider the greater risk is to use the right DNS server, however. If you are in a virtual private network, you should usually use the DNS server of this, but when I tried openVPN once I figured out that this does not work always, "Do I leak" comes handy here. Funny name, btw. What you can do against this is just setting your DNS server to 1.1.1.1, if you trust those guys, I personally think this is at least better than your ISP who even needs to log in some states.

 

This is something I have actually not heard of. Gotta find out how to delete this on my Ubuntu machine, using Windows for this is something that would never come to my mind. And as I found out Unix systems don't have this. That comes handy.

Thank you for your advice, I appreciated it.

All good points.

The intent of my list was not to suggest any kind of solution to these issues, only to illustrate that computer security and online privacy can be more complex than many people realize, and doing things like simply browsing in private mode and clearing your history doesn't mean that there is not a trace of your online activities or that you are totally secure.

There are ways to protect yourself against all the different things I mentioned in my list, but each and every way of addressing those things comes with its own set of caveats.  I think it would be irresponsible to, in this context, say here is what you should do to protect against all these issues, when there are so many varied nuances.  I think the best thing is for people to be aware of what the potential privacy threats are, and decide on their own how they want to address them.  A lot of it also comes down to what kind of adversary you are trying to defend against.  Are you trying to stop your roommate from discovering your secret fetish porn stash, or are you trying to make sure that the authoritarian regime that rules your country doesn't know that you are visiting unapproved websites?

On the DNS issue, it is totally possible to configure most OS's to act as their own DNS server.  This is somewhat limiting, as it involves having to manually enter each host and the IP you want it to resolve to, but if you really, really don't want your ISP, VPN, or any other DNS provider to know what sites your a requesting, this would be one way you could be sure of it.  You can do this in linux with IP tables or on Windows with the hosts file.

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To be honest I feel like I am in the minority who doesn't care much and doesn't take almost any precautions to be incognito. I mean of course I don't want to advertise it on my Facebook account or put a bumper sticker on my car related to it, as well I don't want to attract some kind of weird creep to stalk me, but otherwise I don't see why would I have to take extensive precautions to hide any evidence of it. I am actually looking around to connect with people in my area who share the same interests in omo, I have a Fetlife account that I share with my wife and we have our photos there (with no faces shown), and when I know that someone local is kinky/fetish inclined person I don't mind to tell them my Fetlife name so they can check what I am into (not like it happened a lot, just a few times, and I didn't feel awkward about it at all). My point is that I don't see how my life would go down the drain if someone I know would get to know about my fetishes. May be some people would think I am weird and it's gross but again, it's their opinion and I am not a cookie to be everyone's favorite. Tbh in my late teens I would rather die than let anyone know in person that I like pee holding, getting closer to my mid 30's I really don't care much if someone will figure it out on their own about me.

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It depends upon the device I'm on for my security. I should note that I work in the tech industry, so I probably know more about best security practices then most people here.

If I'm on my phone, I use one browser for porn, and one for regular stuff.

All my computers, including my personal ones, are password protected. If I leave them for even a second I always click Ctrl + L to bring it to the lock screen, so that no one can hop onto my computer without me knowing it.

All my web browsers are set to automatically clear my browsing history the second the browser closes (I'm surprised this isn't an option in the poll. It's ridiculously easy to do in every web browser). The only 'history' my browser retains is my logins at websites (because it's too damn much of a hassle to login every time).

 

While I haven't done it yet, I've been pondering encrypting all the omorashi stuff I've downloaded over the years, so that no one can rip the hard drive out and browse it. I doubt any of my family or friends would ever rip the hard drive out and look through the contents, it would more be for protection if I get a new PC and accidentally forget to remove it before ditching the old hard drive.

 

The hard drive encryption might be a step overboard, but lets just say I've seen someone who had their embarrassing fetishes discovered this way. An ex-employee at one company I used to work at kept their pornography collection on their work PC. When they left the company they forgot to delete the pornography collection on their work computer. Eventually a year after he left someone needed to find some files on his old hard drive... and they noticed a folder called 'Taxes'... where they found a bunch of embarrassing pornography. From what I've heard the pornography involved people using common kitchen objects on each while while having sex. The person who discovered the pornography began to laugh their head off at their desk, which got everyone around them to wander over and ask "ok what's so funny over here", and then join in on the laughing. So pretty much everyone who worked at that company knows of that poor guy's secret fetishes.

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On 5/13/2018 at 3:31 AM, FullBladder85 said:

All my web browsers are set to automatically clear my browsing history the second the browser closes (I'm surprised this isn't an option in the poll. It's ridiculously easy to do in every web browser). The only 'history' my browser retains is my logins at websites (because it's too damn much of a hassle to login every time). 

Oh yes looks like I forgot about that, deleting history is kinda natural to me.

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I use a side OS for all this kink browsing, and my computer is password protected. I use VPNs, but there are holes in those, too. 

Online transactions are particularly challenging. Bound2Burst uses a fairly nondescript name through Verotel but that's only proof against the casual family snoop, not against anything government-related. My best hope for avoiding government entanglement is to just fly under the radar. I'd like to be able to receive payment for stories I've written, but I don't want such transactions going through PayPal -- and I don't trust the cryptocurrencies, either, so I'm stuck so far. 

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I'll leave the room with this site still visibly open and I keep my omo vids in a folder in documents. I could care less who knows about my fetish as I really don't consider it that weird and if anyone does find it weird then hopefully they'll be able to laugh about it.

To be honest I consider this to be one of the least embarrassing fetishes out there.

 

 

Edited by SodaPopinski (see edit history)
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5 hours ago, Tailsuser said:

Why exactly do you think so? I mean, why is omo less embarrassing than BSDM or something?

It's mainly because I see this fetish as so... tame compared to something like BDSM. BDSM involves being tied up, spanked, hurt and other things that someone without the fetish would likely consider very unpleasant. It's also not as gross as something like foot worship (no offense if someone's into that) since pee is pretty much sterile while foot worship is often enjoyed most when the foot is dirty. It's definitely not the most common fetish out there, but it's also not as rare and obscure as watching a woman sit on a balloon until it pops (that's a real thing). So, in general, I just consider it too tame and common to be truly embarrassing.

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I don't really hide my fetish from people. I don't go around broadcasting it openly because in that sense it is a private thing. I don't however care about people finding out, either through perception or finding fetish content on my computer/phone/search history etc. Life is too short to worry about what other people think. If they want to spend their time judging me for what I like then let them, I would rather spend my time enjoying my life.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Pretty much gonna second what Gemmy said. Life is indeed too short to worry about others' opinions.

I have my own PC and handset, if someone decides to snoop around (provided they can get past my passwords) then that's their issue and not mine.

I've had mature conversations with friends where fetishes have come up and I've been honest, but I've never been one to feel that I have to tell my family/friends/colleagues what my personal interests are. I understand some people do (usually AB/DL people I've met) but I feel it's not something you need to tell people that don't need to know (IE - family).

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2 hours ago, Alice Baker said:

I use a VPN pretty much constantly and our ISP doubles it by having our internet line constantly bounced through a different hostmask than I'm actually in. I've had problems with privacy and stalkerish behavior.

I am with Alice on this one though I'm less internet savvy so I haven't actually used a proper vpn in quite awhile. I too have had these problems and have quite literally been stalked, and quite recently had a situation that had me off the walls in anxiety because it almost happened again.

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But that is not nyo! If you use secure connections all the time, it will raise a question: why are you doing that? Do you have something you wish to hide? Along with secure things, you need to create the visage of a good citizen by non-securely watching cat videos, then diving into the deep web.

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I'm not concerned about being discovered, I just make enough effort to hide it that if I ever were discovered, anyone pointing it out is at least equally guilty for snooping in my stuff, and I'm not ashamed to admit my nature. I think that's all I need to do to get by in this world. Also, having been hiding things almost in plain sight for a while, I have to say it's amazing what people will overlook when it's placed along with other things that draw more attention. But also being a kind person goes a long way. If you don't have enemies, you won't likely have anyone with the goal of hurting you socially, so then you can leave yourself vulnerable and not have to worry. I've never had someone go to any significant effort to hurt me. Even school bullies would show restraint when I remained strong and friendly.

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