Jump to content
Existing user? Sign In

Sign In



Sign Up

Is it all right to fantasize about real people?


Recommended Posts

Even after accepting myself fantasizing about fictional characters (with omorashi and my other fetishes) on account of it being harmless, I still haven't really felt comfortable fantasizing about, say, celebrities, or especially people I know personally because I'd have a hard time facing them if I did (even though they'd never know about it). I thought it would be too perverted, so for that reason I still don't.

But, I've been reading a lot of people here do, and haven't been told off for it. So, does that mean it is all right to have those fantasies about real people as long as you keep them to yourselves (or else only share them with others with the fetish/es), and don't say or do anything to make them uncomfortable, or do anything perverted like spying on them in the bathroom, trick them into wetting themselves, etc.?

(Even if so, I'd probably still leave people I know out of my fantasies at least)

I know this probably sounds like a stupid question like my questions usually do. But remember I accepted that side of me a lot later in life than most people usually do. Plus, what reminded me of my uncertainty about this is I just read a fanfic on fimfiction where Sunset Shimmer reads people's minds and gets offended at all their sexual fantasies about her, until she realizes it's only in their subconscious.

Edited by The Dark Wolf (see edit history)
Link to comment
40 minutes ago, DerivativeWings said:

What's in your head is yours and yours only. I don't think it's morally objectionable to fantasize to anything.

In the meatspace, you ought to keep it safe, sane and consensual, though!

A thousand times this. I'd keep sane in there though. There are people who get turned on by the idea of amputating their limbs... don't indulge them.

Fantasize to anyone and everyone, though. That is 100% ok.

Link to comment
1 minute ago, kochel428 said:

A thousand times this. I'd keep sane in there though. There are people who get turned on by the idea of amputating their limbs... don't indulge them.

Fantasize to anyone and everyone, though. That is 100% ok.

Sane means different things to different people, which makes it slightly optional.

My rule of thumb is; don't do something you'll regret in three days or less.

Link to comment

 

2 hours ago, The Dark Wolf said:

Even after accepting myself fantasizing about fictional characters (with omorashi and my other fetishes) on account of it being harmless, I still haven't really felt comfortable fantasizing about, say, celebrities, or especially people I know personally because I'd have a hard time facing them if I did (even though they'd never know about it). I thought it would be too perverted, so for that reason I still don't.

But, I've been reading a lot of people here do, and haven't been told off for it. So, does that mean it is all right to have those fantasies about real people as long as you keep them to yourselves (or else only share them with others with the fetish/es), and don't say or do anything to make them uncomfortable, or do anything perverted like spying on them in the bathroom, trick them into wetting themselves, etc.?

(Even if so, I'd probably still leave people I know out of my fantasies at least)

I know this probably sounds like a stupid question like my questions usually do. But remember I accepted that side of me a lot later in life than most people usually do. Plus, what reminded me of my uncertainty about this is I just read a fanfic on fimfiction where Sunset Shimmer reads people's minds and gets offended at all their sexual fantasies about her, until she realizes it's only in their subconscious.

 Eh... Personally I'm not crazy about fantasizing about people with whom you have a personal, but non-intimate, relationship.  As you suggested.

It just makes boundaries of appropriate behavior a bit blurry if you are orgasming to thoughts of your friends and colleagues and then interacting with them in socially appropriate ways later. 

Obviously it's a debatable point and I'm not suggesting it's inherently unethical, just to add a voice of the other side of said debate.

Link to comment
Guest RedFish3000

Well, I think there's nothing wrong with fantasizing like that, as long as you don't try to make your fantasies true. I myself have had several fantasies about female friends of mine desperate to pee and that kind of stuff, but as long as you keep it to yourself and don't take action on them, I think it's fine.

Link to comment

Fantasising in a "fetish" context about someone you know and find attractive is no different really from doing so in a "vanilla" context, I expect nearly everyone has done so in one way or another.

It's not a problem unless it becomes an obsession, or makes your day-to-day relationship with that person awkward in a way that impacts on your life. And obviously, as the original poster said, involving them in anything non-consensual to satisfy your fantasy (in this case, things like deliberately putting them in situations where they might become desperate or have an accident, or similarly making fake photos or videos) is definitely not on.

And if you want to write a story, just change the name (and avoid any other strongly identifying characteristics). Only you will know who it's really about ;)

Edited by nappypants (see edit history)
Link to comment
  • 1 month later...

I think there is nothing unusal about this, nobody can blame you for this. It also does not hurt anyone directly either, as far as I can tell from experience. But there are two things to keep in mind: First one: Everything you think will have a little bit impact on you, what you say, what you do, usually just unknowingly, some people would also tell you about chaos theory, but that falls in the same category for me, I also do not know much about this theory. So in theory it comes out of your mind. The other thing is quantum physics: Theoretically what you think has impact on other waves, therefore also on objects, people, energy. To come to my conclusion: As long as it does not hurt anybody I think it is OK, but even if you do not notice it in any way it has a little impact on the world around you, might not even be bad.

On 2/15/2018 at 11:34 PM, kochel428 said:

Another way to think of it is, don't do anything to get or give an orgasm that won't go back to normal after the orgasm.

Well I do not think you can take this as a good rule of thumb. If you wet something it will not be completely normal after it. You have to wash it at least, if you do that often, the clothes will look old, I personally like diapers, wetting diapers can not be undone, at least not disposable ones, but there is nothing with it I would not say it is unhealthy for me or other people. (Of course you could argue about climate change or something, but that falls in the category of the above mentioned, I would say.)

Link to comment
47 minutes ago, Tailsuser said:

Well I do not think you can take this as a good rule of thumb. If you wet something it will not be completely normal after it. You have to wash it at least, if you do that often, the clothes will look old, I personally like diapers, wetting diapers can not be undone, at least not disposable ones, but there is nothing with it I would not say it is unhealthy for me or other people. (Of course you could argue about climate change or something, but that falls in the category of the above mentioned, I would say.)

I wasn't talking about inanimate objects. I meant bodies and emotional wellbeing. And "go back to normal" doesn't mean "remains exactly the same." It just means, don't do anything that's psychically or physically damaging to yourself or others.

Link to comment
1 minute ago, kochel428 said:

I wasn't talking about inanimate objects. I meant bodies and emotional wellbeing. And "go back to normal" doesn't mean "remains exactly the same." It just means, don't do anything that's psychically or physically damaging to yourself or others.

Oh, ok. Yes, that seems reasonable. And how to you think about people not being able to cope with their fetish? On the one hand it hurts themselves, but on the other hand suppressing it won't be good either. So they depreciate themselves for doing what they do but they also do something good to themselves.

Link to comment
On 3/27/2018 at 2:29 PM, Tailsuser said:

Oh, ok. Yes, that seems reasonable. And how to you think about people not being able to cope with their fetish? On the one hand it hurts themselves, but on the other hand suppressing it won't be good either. So they depreciate themselves for doing what they do but they also do something good to themselves.

Those people should get therapy before engaging in fetish play with partners.

Link to comment
22 hours ago, Spectator9 said:

Fantasizing about people you know isn't "wrong", but if you do it often it may affect the way you interact with them in the future.  The boundary between fact and fiction may get blurred over time, and emotions can be influenced by both.  Do it with great caution.

While I found the answer to my question a while back, for this reason I will still avoid fantasizing about people I know personally.

Link to comment

I have lots of fantasies about people, friends, crushes, etc. Back in high school, I was in my school’s marching band and I always stood right behind this cute guy. He had a really nice butt and I would always imagin the back of his tight shorts expand as he pushed a load into them, and then watching a stream of pee dribble down his leg and a puddle expand. It was harmless and I never said anything about it or did anything about it, it was just a little daydream. 

I think it’s similar to judging people. It’s pretty hard to be antotally non judge mental person and don’t make any assumptions based on what people say or do or how they look, but it’s okay as long as you don’t say anything about it. I judge the actions of my friends all the time, I can’t help it, but I don’t tell them my judgments, so there’s nothing wrong with it. 

Link to comment

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...