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Stuck (Doctor Who)

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((Here's a fic I wrote recently, sort of a missing scene based on the first episode of the newest Doctor Who season! Featuring Thirteen adjusting to her regeneration, and poor Yaz stuck along for the ride. This is very self-indulgent and I was still figuring out how to write the characters since I'd seen a whopping couple of episodes at the time, and my memory of the older seasons is rusty, but I think it still holds up.))

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Oh how I miss you, my sweet baby TARDIS...

That magical blue box would have been a slice of heaven right about now, but instead she was stuck travelling in a much slower, much less convenient contraption. Yaz's car.

It wasn't that bad, honestly, and Yaz wasn't terrible company, but...it was difficult to be entirely comfortable in anything right now. A different mode of transport, a different body...

The Doctor liked to believe she...he...er, they thrived on adaptability, to adjust to numerous changes, be they slow and minute or quick and drastic, and still remain on top of things in the end. It may get awkward, frantic at times, but it almost always ended in victory, in success.

But as much as she had been trying to adjust to this new incarnation, it wasn't going smoothly. Being a complete confused mess for the first couple of days was normal, but even a week later, she was still struggling. And right now, one particular struggle was making her ever more anxious for Yaz to reach the area where she could tinker with the rest of Tzim-Sha's equipment. The sooner she could engineer a transporter to lead her back to her ship-

-the sooner she could use the toilet before she completely burst.

Her species could retain their urine for much longer than humans before it had to be expelled, that was a fact. It had impressed many of The Doctor's companions over their many travels, and it proved to be very useful in saving time that could be spent gallivanting around on trips or saving a world. Even so, there were limits, roughly seven days, give or take, in Earth time, and she had definitely approached that.

The Doctor had never made a habit of testing his limits to this point if he could have helped it, but this time...

This time it was different. She was different.

It was such a silly thing to get hung up on in the grand scheme of things, she knew that, and she'd chided herself for a lack of open-mindedness, but even so, it was just...uncomfortable. Embarrassing. Horrendously awkward. She'd tried, a couple of days ago in a restaurant when her new friends had invited her out to lunch with them (equal parts a 'thank you for saving us meal', and a 'sorry for your loss' meal to try and ease Ryan and Graham's pain). She'd gotten all the way out of sight on the other end of the restaurant and down the little hall, only to freeze up at the symbol on the door before she could even open it. After so many lives spent being essentially banned from setting foot in there, it was difficult to shake that feeling off. To not feel like women were going to scream when she stepped in, for them to somehow know all that she had been in those lives before.

She'd lingered for a few minutes admiring the decorations on the wall simply to pass time, and then returned to her seat with a smile, joining back in on the conversation.

It hadn't been so bad then. Vaguely nagging, but only if she sat in certain ways. She'd made sure not to drink much for the duration of the meal, and had refused to partake in any further liquid consumption up to this point.

She'd realized, a day later, that maybe it wasn't even the fear of the restroom or its patrons though. At least, not entirely. It was just...she'd rather try this out, just for the first time, in the privacy of the TARDIS. Alone, in a familiar place, with no risk of judgement. Free to be as awkward as she was sure she would be.

So she'd decided to wait while she sketched plans and thought things over, and then today they'd had the funeral and gone shopping for an outfit that, while different, she was actually quite pleased with. Both of those outings had been rather uncomfortable, but between her own grief and moments of excitement, she'd been able to distract herself from the growing urge. But now there was nothing to distract her. She was stuck here in this small metal thing, the scenery outside not serving to impress her in the slightest. She tugged at her seatbelt again, dimly wondering if they were always this uncomfortable, or if it was just because of her current circumstances. 

"You've been awfully quiet." Yaz's voice almost made her flinch as she was yanked from her own head. Glancing over, she saw the woman was still keeping her gaze on the road. "I think this is the first time you haven't chattered my ear off since we met you!"

"Sorry. I just don't really feel like talking." she murmured, shifting a little in her seat. 

"Hey, it's fine, I don't mind. Just an observation." Yaz shrugged. After a few seconds of silence, she spoke up again, albeit more softly. "Is it because of Grace?"

"Huh? Oh, no, not really...I'm just tired, I suppose..." It wasn't a lie, necessarily. Parts of her body certainly were still tired from the regeneration process. Even if other parts of her wanted nothing more than to shuffle and bounce around.

"Guess you finally wore yourself out after this week, huh? I'm surprised it took this long. Just watching you bustle around and talk tires me out, I don't know how you do it!" she chuckled. "Just rest, we'll be there soon."

Nodding, she'd tried to lean back in her seat a little, closing her eyes if only to avoid torturing herself with watching the freedom outside her window. She just had to ignore the throbbing in her abdomen for a little while longer, and then she would be home.

Her moment of attempted rest lasted another five minutes before the car jerked to a stop, the seatbelt tugging to send another jolt of urgency through her. Her breath hitched, and she opened her eyes to find cars packed all around the windows. "What's going on out there?"

Yaz craned her neck, but eventually shrugged. "I can't tell from here. Don't think it's anything too bad though. It should clear up in about thirty minutes."

Why was it that trouble always found her, even when she wasn't seeking it out? Just for once, could she not just take a simple trip without an obstacle in her path? "So we're stuck then?"

"Until it clears up, yeah."

Sighing under her breath, she rested one arm against the window and let her head fall upon it as she stared at the scene outside. She had half a mind to whip out her screwdriver and just blast the bloody traffic out of the way, but of course, that would be unethical. She didn't quite have the presence of mind to solve whatever dilemma was up ahead either. Some things, you just had to leave to the humans, as silly and mind-numbingly slow as their solutions could sometimes be. 

Alright, maybe that thought was a little mean, but her patience had long since flown the coop. The pulsing in her abdomen was constant now and still growing in intensity, an eternal jab against whatever meager comfort she tried to find. Pulling herself away from the window, she tried to lean back again, only to stiffen as that movement stretched her bladder further. Fine. She'd lean forward then, like she was observing the windshield.

"Doctor, are you alright?"

"Just dandy! Why?"

"Because you haven't been able to sit still since we got out of the shop." Yaz glanced over at her, bemused. "Judging by what you've told us, I'm guessing you're used to moving around, but that leg of yours has been shaking the car for most of the drive. You're not claustrophobic or something, are you?" 

"Claustrophobic? Oh no, I've been in too many prison cells and trojan horses for that!" She immediately regretted the chuckle that accompanied her words, whatever smile she'd managed slipping from her face as discomfort took over. With effort, she stilled her jiggling leg and kept her knees apart, no matter how angrily her body protested the actions. "I'm fine, Yaz, really. Just a little anxious to get started working on the transporter, that's all."

"You look more than 'a little anxious', Doctor..." Yaz leaned away from where she'd been slumped over the steering wheel, sitting up to scrutinize her. "Clearly, you're not going to tell us everything about you, and that's fine, but if there's something bugging you right now, can't you tell me?"

The Doctor was a Timelord, an exceptional, powerful being, who had saved countless galaxies and would save countless more, who was strong and courageous and, while sometimes finding himself in silly situations, had almost always gotten out with his dignity intact. He made a point not to show weakness to those he cared about, especially for trivial illnesses and injuries. The Doctor had hoped not to compromise those goals and values so early on in her newest incarnation. 

But Yaz looked so genuinely concerned, and she had no doubt the woman was determined enough to keep interrogating until she was given a satisfying answer. She always had struggled to resist humans, and that ridiculous loyalty and kindness towards those they only barely knew...

Well, there was also the fact that her dilemma was growing dire enough that she would end up giving herself away in a few minutes, even if she did try to hide it. Forcing herself to look Yaz directly in the eyes with all the casualty in the universe, she let her hands shift to rest on her knees. "You want to know what's bothering me? I'm about to burst like a hydration pod on a desert planet. But besides that, I really am fine."

"What? Hydration pod on..." Dark eyebrows furrowed together, then inched upwards as her friend placed the pieces together. "Are you saying you have to pee?"

"Yes. Quite badly, actually. Haven't felt this way in a long time. Wouldn't recommend it, not pleasant in the slightest." she aimed for a joking chuckle, only to grimace as she shifted in her seat again. Fine, no humor to get her through this then. But what was The Doctor without wit? Glancing out the window, she made sure to keep her voice from trembling. "I'll be fine until we get there, so please don't concern yourself."

"Sorry." Yaz murmured, and she saw the woman turn back towards the steering wheel out of the corner of her eye. "But yeah, not like you really have a choice right now. We're blocked in, and I don't really...keep anything in here."

"Keep anything in here for wh-oh..." Right, one of his companions had mentioned a funny story or two. Not that they'd ever had that problem on the TARDIS. "That definitely won't be necessary." she hurried to add. She might have stooped low enough to be caught in this...compromised state, but she wouldn't stoop that low.

I am The Doctor. I will not be beaten by the likes of you, bladder.

~~~

After twenty minutes that seemed to stretch on for sun-cycles, alternating between half-baked attempts at staggered conversation or dead silence, the cars around them began to move, and she huffed under her breath as the car began to follow, slowly picking up speed as the traffic cleared and cars began to turn off onto other streets. The rolling motion of the vehicle was making the sack of liquid inside her pulse stronger, but the mere knowledge that they were finally getting out of stasis was enough to ease her mind, at least.

As Yaz kept driving, she kept her legs squeezed together, constantly swapping one over the other or winding them around, bouncing her knees or rubbing her hands along the thighs. A disorganized rhythm of movements, none of them very helpful, but arguably the only thing she could do by this point to avoid losing control. There was nothing logical about it, but her body seemed to insist, overriding any knowledge of social graces or customs. Her breathing was growing heavier as she yanked at her seatbelt again, glancing at the dashboard clock. If she could just stand, that would be so much easier than-

Just then, her bladder spasmed, the shudder rolling all the way up her spine as it squeezed and pulsed, begging to empty its contents. It was so full and swollen that she was shaking, and despite her best efforts, a sudden trickle ran into her undergarments, forcing a strange noise between a gasp and a whimper from her lips. 

"Doctor?"

She just barely managed to clench those quivering new muscles to stop the flow, but the urgency actually burned, and she knew it couldn't be contained anymore. "Yaz, you need to pull over! As soon as humanly possi-no, as soon as universally possible, it's faster!"

"What? We're in the middle of downtown, I can't just-"

"Yaz, listen to me! Your car is going to become very wet if I don't get out in the next two minutes."

"You really can't hold it until we get there in ten-"

"I've been holding it for a week! I really don't believe my bladder is content to wait any longer!"

At this, Yaz jerked her eyes from the road for a moment, mouth agape. "A week?!? You mean you haven't gone at all since we met you?!? How do you-"

"You know I have two hearts, and that's the part that baffles you!?!" She might have laughed, but it would have been absolutely disastrous to do so. "I can give you a rundown on my biology later, but you need to pull over now!"

Rushing to turn her attention back towards the road before they risked crashing, the woman shook her head. "Okay, okay! Just give me a minute to find an opening!"

A minute. A single minute. To a Timelord, it was the mere blink of an eye, half a blink even. But now, it seemed to stretch on par with the longest journeys and wars, as if she would have grown old and grey and died a thousand times over before the timer rang. Every second was a fresh round of torture, and she found any scrap of dignity she had left tossed aside as she buried her hands between her legs, pulled her lip between her teeth, and rocked. Rocked and writhed in that seat like she was a bomb that would go off the moment she ceased movement. It didn't feel very far from the truth. Her bladder was pulsing in sharp, rhythmic waves with every breath, each pain sending shudders up her spine and fresh tingling to that sensitive, strange new organ.

She couldn't remember ever having to go so badly before. Perhaps once or twice, when The Doctor was at some random holiday shindig or other on a random planet. One New Years Eve party with another Earth companion stuck in her memory, when they'd both gotten absolutely plastered. But at least The Doctor's body hadn't been fully aware then, too drunk off his arse. She was aware of every throb, every spasm, every bump in the road or this cursed seatbelt digging into her swollen skin.

As Yaz whipped to turn the corner onto a side street she had to double over, a gasp shooting from her mouth as her body ached more suddenly, much more strongly than ever. "Oh, goodness..." she groaned, screwing her eyes shut and clutching herself tighter. Her thoughts were not helping. She could barely breathe, any inhale at all feeling like she was about to lose that precious thread of control.

The moment she felt the car stop, she was lunging for the handle, almost clawing at it before Yaz reached over to unlock it for her. She scrambled out as fast as she could, and even though standing had caused a horrific shift in gravity, she didn't even take the time to notice the added pressure, bolting into the alley her friend had so kindly parked in front of. Her hands were already moving away from her crotch to toy with the front of her pants.

And in that moment, she realized something very crucial. Suspenders were a mistake.

There was no zipper to fumble with, nothing but a blank canvas of dark blue fabric that held her lower half like a prison. After a second of feeling around, a few more drips leaked out, and she was forced to shove her hands back between her legs with a whimper, muttering all manner of Galifreyan and a few choice intergalactic curses under her breath.

She was absolutely fit to burst, and she couldn't remove her hands from between her legs. Not if she wanted to avoid drenching the outfit her new companions had been so kind as to pay for. Clothes could be cleansed, yes, but it would certainly stain The Doctor's dignity, and possibly their friendship. Feeling absolutely frantic now, she scampered back to the edge of the alley. "Bsst! Yaz! Yaz!"

The woman ducked her head around the brick corner where she'd been standing guard, hissing to ensure she wasn't loud enough to draw attention. "What's wrong?"

She didn't get embarrassed by many things. Or at least, her last few incarnations hadn't. But this was making her cheeks burn, and her breathlessness didn't ease the words she had to coax out. "I...u-um, I can't quite get these off! Not without...I need your help! Please, before I have an accident!"

She couldn't quite read the look on Yaz's face, but that may have been because she wasn't actually looking at the woman at all. She was staring at her brown boots as she shuffled her legs around, all but tap-dancing on the spot. Just keep moving. As long as she kept moving, she could hold it.

"Doctor, I can't help you if you don't stay still!" Yaz hissed in her ear, dragging them both deeper into the alley and fumbling with the overall clips. "You keep jerking them out of my hands!" 

"I'm sorry, I've never needed it this badly before!" she whined, forcing herself to stand still, with the exception of one extremely jiggly leg. "It was so much easier when I could just whip it out..."

Yaz didn't respond, eyebrows furrowed as she concentrated on the clips. Finally, she unlatched them both, the overalls dropping to The Doctor's feet. "Alright! Quick, give me your coat!" 

Trying not to shiver at the sudden exposure to the air her bare legs were receiving, she fumbled to shrug off the coat and step out of the overalls, making sure to keep one hand on her crotch at all times. Even with that pressure, her bladder was weakening by the second, a few drops beginning to tease her inner thighs as she hurried over to the wall. 

"Those are the ugliest boxers I've seen in my life. They remind me of my grandpa." Yaz snorted. Whether it was supposed to be to lighten the mood or just fill the awkward silence, she wasn't sure.

"Hey, they were fashionable when I bought them! And they didn't call me grandpa, they called me daddy." As her bladder was desperately trying to tell her though, there wasn't time for defense of her past fashion choices. "Now, how do I-Just 'pop a squat,' right?" Fighting to tug her plaid boxers down with one hand, she used the other to prop herself up from behind, trying her best to balance into a sitting position, warm leaks already beginning to wet the fabric and her hand. "How did they do this on all our trips? This is ridiculous!" She had a newfound sympathy for Rose and all the others now. Her thighs were shaking just trying to hold herself up, and she almost fell backwards, trying to regain her balance while still battling with her underwear. 

"Hang on! Let me help!" Poor Yaz sounded equal parts embarrassed and concerned, and probably more than a little baffled by her train wreck of a display. Her own face was burning as she heard the clothing being dropped far off to the side, and both Yaz's hands found their way to her shoulders to hold her upright. "Just keep your bloomers out of the way, alright?" the woman mumbled.

"Right, thank you..." Her own voice was a breathy squeak as she used both hands to pull the fabric down and held it out of the way. Just in the nick of time, because her last shred of control had been lost. The dam completely burst in one sudden, jabbing urge that made her gasp out loud, and soon she was gushing all over the pavement. It was a little too warm, hissing and splattering out with a force she hadn't felt in ages, a sensation that pulled a moan from her lips. All of the pain she'd been feeling finally reduced to numbness, a relief so great she found herself nearly crying, hitching breath unable to keep up with the effort her body was expending. Was she sweating? Good grief, she was sweating. First thing on her agenda once the TARDIS was located: a hot shower.

The sound of urine drenching asphalt seemed to go on for minute after minute, the puddle expanding around both their shoes despite their efforts to shuffle away, and running along the alley in a little black stream to meet the base of the old brick wall. The Doctor had never felt so awkward, so powerless in all her- their lives, being held up by another person for an action this private, in a place that was decidedly not appropriate.

She should probably have been overwhelmed by shame, but...right now she was just overflowing with gratitude. And urine.

When it finally did trickle to a stop, she tried to take a moment to compose herself, taking in a quivering breath and exhaling. "I...I think I'm done. You can pull me up now."

"As soon as you pull your boxers back up." Yaz muttered, and when she glanced upwards she saw the woman very pointedly looking up at the sky.

"Right. Sorry." The growing breeze did feel a little strange, hitting that. Tugging the fabric back into place, which was luckily only slightly cold and damp in patches, she then pushed off with her legs as her escort heaved her back into a standing position. After a bit of wobbling from her shaking legs, she was confident enough to step away from Yaz. "Well, crisis averted. Well done, Yaz. I'll get dressed and we can get moving. Chop chop, we're burning daylight."

"You're moving on, just like that? We're not going to talk about this?"

"Did you want to talk about it?"

"Well, no. Er, maybe? I mean...I guess not. But are you okay?"

"Oh yeah, I'm just chipper. Feeling way better, got my eye on the prize and raring to go!" Stepping back into the overalls, she managed to fasten the straps herself this time, shaking a few drops of liquid off of her boots and then leaving the rest behind in wet footprints as she started to walk towards the alley entrance, dusting off her coat and pulling it on as she went. 

"You bounce back really fast."

"Well, it's over and done with now, so there's no use dwelling on it, is there? I've got an entire life time ahead of me, this moment is merely a blink, whoosh! It's gone! It's all about perspective!"

"I...I guess? Okay then, if you're really alright..." Yaz followed along, fishing the keys out of her pocket and clicking them until a noise came from the car.

"I really am fine now, trust me." And she was, honestly. Relieved, maybe a little tired, but fine. A smidgeon embarrassed. But she could cast that out once she was distracted by her plans ahead. There was a strange feeling nagging at her though, and before she could really think better of it, she turned to glance back at Yaz. "Am I supposed to be a little turned on though? I mean, I would never want to repeat that incident again in a millennia, but I'm weirdly turned on, just a little."

"I..." Yaz trailed off, and she was beginning to regret speaking when she noticed her friend looked like her brain had been utterly fried by the endless strange revelations and events of the past few days and now. But the woman had the patience of a saint, or maybe she just decided to roll with it, because she shrugged as she reached the car and held the passenger door open for her. "I mean, your bladder and...uh...it's all around the same place, so it can happen. I'm assuming. Just how close to human are you, minus the two hearts and ridiculously huge bladder?"

Ah, so it wasn't abnormal? She'd never felt that way before...new addition with these parts, then. Curious. An interesting thing to research on a rainy day, maybe. "Pretty close. Most of my organs function a little differently, depending on what I need them to do for particular environments, but they're about the same placement and appearance."

"Really?" Yaz's eyebrows flicked up, her eyes sparking with that amusing curiosity humans always had when this topic came up. "Can I see an X-Ray sometime?"

"Once I get the transporter working, we'll see." Settling into her seat, she was pleasantly surprised to find the tugging instrument of torture strapping her in was actually not very uncomfortable.  As the car started moving again, she glanced out the window, watching the alley disappear behind them. "Thank you for assisting me back there...I promise, that sort of thing doesn't happen often."

"It's fine, Doctor. You've done enough for us, saving you from...that, is the least I could do."

"I trust you won't tell the others about this?"

"About what? We just got caught up in traffic, right?"

For a very brief moment, she had a horrible thought of Deja-vu, wondering if after thousands of years yet another species had come to wipe Earth residents' memories. But then she caught the hint of a coy smile on Yaz's lips and the wink she shot her before glancing back at the road, and her breath finally relaxed as she leaned back in her seat, casting a slight smile back. "Ah, yes! O-Of course, just traffic..." 



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